


This Bird Set Free

by thatmitchsentho



Category: Pitch Perfect
Genre: F/F, HSAU, High School AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-09
Updated: 2018-07-17
Packaged: 2018-08-07 16:38:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 49,088
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7722034
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatmitchsentho/pseuds/thatmitchsentho
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Beca Mitchell finds herself expelled from Greenhill College and lands at Barden Academy. Not ideal for three weeks into senior year, and even less ideal that her dad taught at her old high school. So now she's here at Barden and trying to figure out where she fits in at school, and how she's going to figure out what's going on at home. [Mitchsen endgame, other pairing involved.]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Beca Mitchell looked up at the gates from the safety of her parked car and sighed. Barden Academy. This was so not the place she wanted to be right now. Or ever. Yes, technically it did have the reputation of being one of the finest high schools in Greater Atlanta, save for maybe Greenhill College, but her recent expulsion from said College had landed her here instead. Sure, it hadn't been ideal for her to get expelled three weeks into her senior year. Especially from a school that her father held a tenured position at. But what was done was done. Now she was staring up at the gates of what looked like hell on earth, wearing a plaid skirt, a button down and a fucking tie. Uniforms. Fucking archaic.

She grabbed her bag, got out and locked the door. Just as she'd hoped, the first bell went. She didn't want to socialize with any more of these people than necessary. Unfortunately, a group of boys by the front gate weren't in a hurry to get to class. One of them let out a wolf whistle, and she rolled her eyes.

"Gonna get me some of that fresh meat," he said in a cocky tone.

"Go fuck yourself, Abercrombie," she said with a glare and stalked toward the office building. She was pointed to a chair by a surly looking receptionist, set to wait until she was summoned by the principal. She followed him in to his office and sat opposite him at a desk that was supposed to be intimidating.

"Miss Mitchell," he said. "We don't normally take mid term transfers. Especially in circumstances like yours."

"Yes, well I personally think that the bigger tragedy is that I'm being forced to transfer at all," Beca said. He didn't seem to appreciate her comment.

"Fortunately, your grades and extracurricular activities are… acceptable." Beca restrained from snorting audibly. Acceptable was a joke. She was top three in her class. "Did you have any questions?"

"No, sir, I read the school handbook and student guide cover to cover, I'm ready to go." He eyed her with a measure of disdain.

"You'll have to roll those sleeves down," the man said to her pointedly.

"Why?" Beca said. "Three quarters of the students here have their sleeves rolled, including just about every single person I walked past on the way in." She knew why. She had read the school uniform code quite carefully and was prepared for this conversation.

"Tattoos are not permitted," he said.

"Could you point me to where it says that in the dress code, please?" Beca asked, pulling out her code of conduct. "I must have missed it." The man gave her an unimpressed stare, and she matched it with an unflinching stare of her own.

"It's in there," he said. "Trust me on that."

"I'm sure it isn't," Beca said. "There are rules about makeup and what size jewelry I can wear in my piercings, there are rules about the length of skirts and shorts, rules about shoes and hair color, how the school tie is to be tied, and there are even rules about not having any other color shoelaces but black. But nowhere in this dress code is there a single sentence saying that tattoos are prohibited."

"Well, perhaps there should be," he said. "Perhaps we've never had a student with body art before."

"Well, until your dress code is amended, which according to your school handbook has a full term cooling off period so that replacement dress codes can be reprinted and handed out to all parties at the school, I'm afraid you can't force me to roll my sleeves down," she said, getting up and shouldering her bag. "Now, if that's all, I don't want to miss more class than I already have." The man visibly bristled.

"Not an ideal start, is it Miss Mitchell?" he said. "Dismissed." Beca rolled her eyes and slouched out. The woman at the desk handed her a stack of papers.

"All your teachers need to sign the top one," she said. "Bring it back once you've seen them all."

"Okay," she said. She used the poorly photocopied map that she'd been provided to navigate her way to her homeroom class. She paused for just a second before she took a deep breath and entered. This was going to suck.

"Miss Mitchell," the woman said. "I was told you were coming." Beca looked at the teacher. She could feel the eyes of every other student in the room locked on to her.

"Yep," she said. "You need to sign this." She handed the teacher her form, and she scribbled on it.

"Aubrey?" she said. A prim and polished looking blonde looked up. "Would you mind giving Rebecca the lay of the land?" Beca rolled her eyes.

"Sure," Aubrey said.

"It's Beca," the brunette clarified to the teacher.

"Pardon?" the teacher asked.

"Not Rebecca. Beca. Legally my name, has been for years," she said. "Since I was born, actually. It's also written on the top of the form I just gave you."

"Sorry," the woman said with not even a shred of sincerity. "Beca." Beca slouched toward the seat she'd been guided toward, dropping her bag at the side of her desk. There was a guy sitting across the aisle, and before Beca could even say hello to the blonde who would be her chaperone, he leaned over.

"Hey," the guy said. "I'm Jesse."

"Hey," she said disinterestedly. It didn't deter him.

"What classes are you taking?" he asked, gesturing to the top sheet of paper on her stack. She didn't answer so he peered over. "Goddamn Aubrey, she's taking as many AP classes as you." Aubrey looked over, and the entire room was also listening. Nobody was more intense about school than Aubrey.

"Really?" Aubrey said.

"What AP classes are you taking?" a redhead asked from a row behind her.

"Bio, Chem, Physics B, English Lang, English Lit, Spanish, Music, Politics and Government," she said.

"Holy shit," said a brunette sitting next to the redhead. "Why?"

"I get bored," she shrugged. She was pretty much radiating a solid field of 'leave me alone', so apart from the blonde, nobody spoke to her for the rest of homeroom. Even the interactions with the blonde - Aubrey? - were limited to a quick skim of her timetable and some directions on the shitty map she had. The bell rang and she pulled a chunky pair of headphones out of her bag and plugged them into something in her pocket and headed for the hall, keeping her head down, following the throng of students to the next class.

Classes were barely tolerable. She found that most teachers didn't appreciate the chunky headphones around her neck, the piercings, the tattoos and the nail polish. But she was more than able to keep up in class, so they were left with no choice but to narrow their eyes in quiet disdain. And that was something she was used to. She got that at Greenhill, hell she got that at home, too.

When lunch came, Beca found herself sitting with a student named Cynthia Rose. She'd ended up next to the girl in Math and found her to be refreshingly honest, very chill and kind of funny. They'd hit it off talking about music and next thing you know, Beca had her first actual friend at Barden Academy. They were soon joined by an exuberant Australian.

"Hey," she said. "New chick? What's up? I'm Fat Amy."

"Fat Amy?" Beca asked with a smirk and a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah," she said. "If I call myself Fat Amy, twig bitches like the ones we got here can't do it behind my back, you know?" Beca laughed.

"I'm Beca," she said.

"We take Math together," Cynthia Rose said to Amy.

"Ah. Now, forgive me shorty, but why is Aubrey Posen looking at you like she might be sizing you up for a cage fight?" Beca looked around and saw that the blonde was indeed appraising her with a cool stare.

"I don't know. I've barely actually spoken to her," Beca said. "We have homeroom together though, and some guy was saying that apparently I take as many AP classes as her, which grabbed her attention."

"Well," Cynthia Rose said, "Aubrey's pretty much had the valedictorian spot on lockdown for months. And if you're showing up with more AP credit, she's worried. What's your GPA like?"

"It's 4.0, for all my non AP classes. I don't know how you guys weigh AP classes here, to be honest," she said. "I'm meeting the guidance counselor later because they haven't figured out how to weight me and my dad wants to know how bad this unplanned transfer looks on paper."

"You're not just a regular transfer?" Amy asked. "What'd you do, get expelled from your last school?"

"Uh, yeah," Beca said. Cynthia Rose smiled. Amy put her burger down and gave her full attention to the new girl.

"So what'd you do?" Amy asked.

"I punched an All American wide receiver and knocked him out," Beca said. "And I wouldn't apologize."

"Oh damn!" Cynthia Rose said. "You've got some spunk, that's for sure."

"Yeah, well, he should've kept his fucking mouth shut," Beca said. "He gave me shit daily for years, and after it became painfully obvious the school administration were going to do nothing, I didn't do anything about it either. But then he said something I couldn't ignore, so I punched him in his fucking mouth."

"What did he say?" Amy asked.

"He asked how I could possibly know I was gay if I'd never had a dick in my mouth and then described how he might allow himself to slum it for a day and let me try it out," Beca said. Cynthia Rose's jaw dropped. "He grabbed my head and shoved it into his crotch, so I hit him, and I hit him fucking hard. Thought I'd broken a knuckle or something."

"You're fucking joking, right?" Beca shook her head. "And they wanted you to apologize for that?"

"It was probably more the fact that the football team has a concussion and head injury rule. If you've been concussed or unconscious within 48 hours of game time, you don't play. He was unconscious for all of thirty six seconds, sat that night's game out, and the Greenhill Lion Pride went down by eighteen points," Beca said. "As if I give a shit about football."

"So the school kicked you out for decking a homophobic jock?" Amy said. She looked like she was weighing something over in her head. Then she picked her burger back up. "Worth it."

"Yeah, definitely," Cynthia Rose agreed.

"It wasn't ideal to wait until senior year, though," Beca sighed. "My dad will be ever so thrilled if it kills off my college prospects. Though they're his prospects, not mine. He was a teacher at my old school, and even he was of the opinion that I shouldn't have hit Tom, but should have let the school handle it. Because of the bang up job they'd done so far."

"Is he cool with you being gay?" Cynthia Rose asked.

"Hard to tell. I've told him, but we've never talked about it since," Beca said. "It makes him uncomfortable, I think. But we don't talk much to begin with."

"What about your mom?" Amy asked innocently.

"She died when I was fourteen," Beca said. "Just me and dad now."

"Sorry," Amy said. "Sometimes my mouth, not so much connecting with my brain."

"Nah, it's cool. I mean, my mom was fucking awesome and I miss her, but it was a long time ago and I've made my peace with it," Beca said. "She knew about me being gay though, she was always pointing out cute girls to me. Kind of embarrassing at the time, but I actually miss it now."

"Do you have a girlfriend?" Cynthia Rose asked.

"Not right now," Beca said. "There was a girl at Greenhill, but we broke up over the summer. Apparently I'm a little intense for a high schooler and that turned her off a bit. But that's okay, because damn, do you have some pretty girls here at Barden."

"Yeah, we really do," Cynthia Rose agreed. The two of them shared a look and Beca knew that she was also gay.

"Surrounded by gays," Amy sighed. "This literally happens everywhere I go. Not that I mind, since that just means there's more boys available, and they all love Fat Amy."

"Like, honestly," Beca said, "Is there some unspoken rule that every hot girl in this school sits at that table?" She pointed to the table where the girls from her homeroom and half the cheerleading team were sitting.

"Anyone in particular caught your eye?"

"It's just looking at the moment," Beca said. "I've only spoken two words to most of those girls, they were nice enough. But I can't just go for hot, I need more than that, you know?"

"Which ones were in your homeroom?" Cynthia Rose asked.

"The redhead, and the brunette with the legs that go on forever," Beca said. "They were sitting with that Aubrey chick."

"The redhead is Chloe, the brunette is Stacie," Cynthia Rose said. "You know who Aubrey is, and the other blonde with the curls is Jessica. Then you've got Casey, Holly, Ingrid, Sarah and Amelia." She pointed them out around the table.

"All quite attractive," Amy said. "If you're into that sort of thing."

"And they're nice, for the most part. Aubrey can be uptight but if I had her dad breathing down my neck I'd be a crazy rabid bitch too," Cynthia Rose said. "That sounds harsh. She's not as bad as she can come off."

"Noted." She looked around a little more and saw a table full of guys staring at her, one of them being the guy she'd sworn at that morning.

"Hey Cynthia Rose," she said. "Who's that guy?" She jerked her head toward him.

"That's Bumper," she said. "Douche. King of douches."

"Ah. I thought as much."

"They're all staring at you," Amy said.

"He whistled at me this morning and I told him to go fuck himself, which I don't think he appreciated," she said. Amy laughed and high fived her.

"You're going to be an interesting person to know," she said. "I like you."

"So what's the situation at this school anyway?" Beca asked. "Please don't tell me it's packed with assholes or something."

"It's pretty okay," Amy said.

"Yeah," Cynthia Rose said. "I mean, Bumper, he's definitely an asshole. And a couple of the guys really idolize him so they can be dicky too. But you're not going to get shit just for existing here. They wouldn't let that bullshit homophobia slide here. It's never been a problem for me."

"Um, are you comfortable with people knowing you're of the lady loving persuasion?" Amy asked.

"I'm out," Beca said. "Why?"

"Because Jesse Swanson is looking at you with some major heart eyes," Amy said. Beca looked around and recognized the guy from homeroom.

"Right," she said. "It's cool. If he comes and tries to start something I'll just tell him. But on the whole I don't really care who knows. Not my fault girls are gorgeous."

"Preach," Cynthia Rose said. They continued talking over lunch until the bell went.

"What class do you have now?" Amy asked.

"AP Chem," Beca said.

"I'm going that way," Cynthia Rose said. They got up and made their way toward the science rooms.

"So have you got a type?" Cynthia Rose asked her.

"I do, I guess. I'm not like, saying I'd only date my type but I'm a fan of a cute blonde," Beca said. "But for the record, that Stacie chick? Wow. Legs for days."

"I know, right?" Cynthia Rose said. "She's straight, though. But damn, that girl is definitely hot. Fortunately she's also really cool. Like I said, most of the girls are."

"I'll catch up with you later?" Beca said as she reached her classroom. Cynthia Rose nodded and she headed inside. To her extreme surprise there was about twelve people in the class, one being the girl they'd just been speaking about in the hall. The girl waved at her from her bench space, Aubrey sitting two rows behind them with another boy.

"Hey," she said. "There's a spare seat here if you like." Beca went and sat next to the other girl.

"So, Beca," Stacie said. "How's your first day going?"

"Not bad," Beca said. "Class is class."

"You're from Greenhill, right? Isn't that like forty minutes away?"

"Yeah," Beca said. "It's a bitch of a commute but Greenhill's out of the question and my dad is all anti-public school and shit." Stacie nodded as the class began. Beca was surprised to see how into the lessons Stacie was; apparently she was quite the science nerd. As they worked on the project at hand, Stacie asked her what classes she was taking, so Beca told her.

"Oh, you're taking a lot of the same classes as Aubrey and me," Stacie said, jerking her head backward. "I mean, I'm taking the same AP science classes as you, and music, but you and Bree are like, going to be everywhere together."

"You're taking music as well?"

"Yeah," Stacie said. "It's a good class. So you're musical?" Beca nodded.

"Music is kinda my thing," she said.

"Oh really? Do you play something?"

"I play lots of things," Beca shrugged. "It's weird, I've never really not been able to play something I've picked up. But I more like making music at the moment. Mixing, mashups, DJing, that sort of stuff."

"Oh, cool," Stacie said. "You should let me hear some stuff sometime." They talked while they worked, until the bell rang, signaling that it was time for music.

"Does Aubrey take AP Music as well?" Beca asked.

"It's pretty much the one AP course she doesn't take," Stacie said. "Her dad thinks music is a waste of time. He's like, the hardest of hardasses. Bree stresses herself sick trying to make him happy." Beca could tell Stacie worried about Aubrey from the tone in her voice and it made her resolve that whatever standoffish impression she'd gotten from the other girl in homeroom that morning, she'd look past it.

During music, Beca found herself sitting with Stacie, and with a few of the other girls she'd spotted at their lunch table. Chloe, the redhead, was on the other side of her and next to that was Jessica, the other blonde. Cynthia Rose was sitting in front of her with a handful of guys, including Jesse, who kept trying to turn around and talk to Beca.

"So what do you do for fun?" he said.

"Shoot pool with my buddies in Greenhill," Beca said. "Music. Hang out. Same stuff everyone else does."

"Do you like foreign movies?" he asked. "There's a film festival on next weekend if you're interested." Everyone seemed to cringe.

"You're a movie nerd?" Beca asked.

"I guess," he said. "So. Interested?" Cynthia Rose shot her a look.

"Is this a date type invitation?" Beca asked, twirling her pen in her fingers.

"Um, maybe?" he said. Beca dropped the pen.

"Okay, dude," she said. "Let's just go with thank you, but no. Because firstly, it's literally my first day here and that would be way too intense. But secondly and most importantly, I'm not really in the market for a boyfriend."

"Already seeing someone?" he asked.

"No," Beca said. "But if I were, it would be a girl, get my drift?" Jesse nodded slowly.

"Sure," he said. "No harm, no foul?"

"Sweet," Beca said. "But we can hang out sometime if you're cool with just being friends and you know, not a movie. Not really my thing." He nodded, taking the revelation well. But Beca could feel eyes on her, as she'd outed herself to her new classmates.

"Speaking of hanging out," Stacie said, "Next Friday I'm having a party at my place. You should come, everyone is."

"Is it your birthday?" Beca asked. Stacie nodded. "Sure, why not. It's not like my dad will notice I'm gone anyway."

"Say what?" Cynthia Rose asked.

"He's dating this medical receptionist so he's basically either at Greenhill or he's at her place," Beca said. "We don't see each other much."

"Do you have any brothers or sisters?" Jessica asked.

"Nope, it's literally just me," Beca said. They all got back to work, and despite her first impression of the school, Beca had to admit that she wasn't hating her first day at Barden Academy.


	2. Chapter 2

The next couple of days went really easily for her. Sure, her teachers were still not overly impressed with her appearance or attitude but were relegated to silence since she technically wasn't doing anything wrong. But she settled in just fine, hanging out with Cynthia Rose and Amy, or even with Stacie and some of the others. It was weird, there wasn't really a firm set of rules around who hung out with who, they all kind of just mingled.

It was the first Thursday she'd been at Barden when she snagged Chloe and Jessica walking toward their lunch table and stopped them so she could ask a question.

"So, Chloe, Jessica," Beca said. "If you've got a second, I have to ask you guys something, a favor of sorts."

"What's that?" the redhead asked, stopping next to Beca.

"Any chance you guys know what kind of music Stacie is into?" Beca said. "I was thinking if I could find out what some of her favorite songs are I might put together a couple of mixes or something for her as kind of a birthday present to give her next week." She gestured to the open laptop in front of her, where she was already working on something.

"Hey, that's super cool," Jessica said. "You really make your own mixes? How do you even do that?"

"Oh," Beca said. "Um, sit if you like, I can show you." The blonde sat her tray down and perched next to Beca on the seat, eager to learn about whatever it was the brunette was doing on the screen.

"I'll get you some ideas and Facebook them to you later today," Chloe said to Beca, "But I'll leave you guys to it." Beca tugged the headphones off and unplugged them, then set about showing Jessica the basics of how she made a mix. She used a couple of songs she'd already mixed before, and after she showed her how to match up the downbeats and adjust tempos, she showed her the finished product.

"I mean, obviously there's a fair amount of tweaking and stuff, this is just the basics," Beca said. "It's also a bit noisier around here than I like it when I'm working on stuff."

"I would be completely lost even trying to figure something like that out," Jessica said. "I can't believe how good it sounds when you're done, though."

"Thanks," Beca said.

"Stacie said you're a bit of a music nerd," Jessica said. "For want of a better term. What else are you into?"

"Well, in terms of listening I'm really down for almost anything," Beca said. "But yeah, music nerd probably applies." Jessica stayed with her for the rest of the lunch period. Beca showed her a couple more of the mixes she'd worked on and even let her try matching downbeats, but the blonde was more than happy to admit that it wasn't her forte.

"It's fine," Jessica said, "I'll stick to singing."

"You know I was surprised that your school has such a big AP music class," Beca said. "At Greenhill there were only four of us."

"Barden used to have a focus on the arts," Jessica said. "I think my dad said that, anyway. But funding is easier if they just go for excellence across the board and not just arts, so it switched, but it's definitely more arty than the other schools in the area."

"Greenhill was more about STEM," Beca said. "It's like, some massive honor if you graduate and go to MIT."

"Do you miss it?" Jessica asked.

"Greenhill?" Beca said. "Too soon to tell, I guess. I miss some of my friends, though most of them graduated last year. But I still see them after school and weekends."

"That's nice," Jessica said. They turned their attention back to the computer in front of them for the remainder of the lunch period.

It was the following Monday when Beca locked her car and headed across the parking lot. She saw a blonde figure struggling with some kind of bulky folders, bigger than an arms breadth, so she stopped.

"Hey Jess," Beca said. "Do you need a hand with that?"

"Would you mind?" Jessica asked. "It's my art portfolios, they're freaking huge."

"If I minded I wouldn't have offered," Beca said. "Load me up." She swung her messenger bag behind her and accepted the armload of books presented to her by Jessica, the blonde taking some kind of black case and the bulky folders.

"Where are we headed?" Beca asked.

"Art building," Jessica said. "Thank you so much."

"No prob," Beca said. "So you're an art nerd as opposed to a music nerd?"

"Yeah," Jessica said with a smile. "I'm trying to get some stuff together to start submitting my college applications. There are a few art schools I'm interested in and I really shouldn't leave it too late."

"That's rad," Beca said. "Your folks are okay with you skipping out on a more traditional degree to study art?"

"Well, mom had to talk dad around a little but once he actually saw the stuff I was doing and realised it wasn't just some little hobby, he was fine," Jessica said. "How does your dad feel about the music thing?"

"Oh he's not a fan of that at all," Beca said. "But it's going to make me happy, and mom would have wanted that. She was all about music."

"Maybe he doesn't like it because it reminds him of her too much," Jessica observed.

"Yeah, maybe," Beca said. "Who knows? We're not close, I wouldn't presume to know what he's thinking on any given subject unless he outright tells me."

"Were you close with your mom?" Jessica asked. It was an innocent question but Beca paused so she'd assumed she'd said the wrong thing. "Sorry, we probably don't know each other well enough for that kind of question."

"No, it's okay," Beca said. "Mom and I were really close. I didn't even have to tell her that I was gay. She just knew. I told her everything, though."

"Sounds like you miss her a lot," Jessica said.

"I do," Beca said. "Don't get me wrong, I know she's gone and everything and I've dealt with that but I do miss her. More than I know what to do with." They walked on in silence for a while until they reached the art building. Beca held the door so Jessica could get her stuff inside.

"Thanks again Beca," Jessica said. "I always underestimate how much stuff I have until I have to bring it all down."

"Glad to help," she said. "I'd love to see what you're working on."

"Seriously?" Jess said.

"Sure," Beca said. "I mean, I'm not an artist myself but I'm not averse to art."

"Most people just aren't that interested," Jessica said. She opened one of the portfolios and pulled a piece out. Beca was impressed. It was watercolor and ink, and all Beca knew was that it was really good. She knew a couple of arty types back at Greenhill, but this was better by far than anything she'd seen any of them produce.

"Wow," she said. "This is really cool."

"Thanks," Jessica said. "I've got six in this same style, it's going to be the bulk of my submissions, so hopefully the admitting boards like them as much as you do."

"I'm sure they will," Beca said. "Seriously." She left Jessica in the art room and headed off to class. But as she sat in homeroom, her mind drifted back to the blonde. She was pretty. And easy to talk to. She hadn't come to Barden looking to start dating anyone straight away, but Jessica was creeping into more of her daily thoughts. There were some glaringly obvious questions that she needed before she could even think about pursuing that, though. And whilst she'd only been the school for a week, she knew just who to ask.

Stacie and Chloe. They were very clearly the center of the social scene at Barden. Everyone knew them, everyone liked them. And they weren't your normal queen bees. They were nice and approachable, and Cynthia Rose had pointed out that they were inclusive - Stacie didn't just invite her friends to her party, she invited everyone. If there were two people who were going to be able to give her the skinny on Jessica, they were it.

She decided to head them off one morning before classes so she could do her recon without being overheard by half the school. She wasn't really one for wasting time, so the following morning she sat on the hood of her car in the parking lot, drinking a large coffee with her headphones and sunglasses on, waiting for them to arrive in Chloe's mini cooper. Sure enough, they arrived together and headed toward the gates.

"Hey," Beca said from the hood of her car, tugging the headphones down. "You guys have a sec?"

"What's up?" Stacie asked.

"I was hoping to catch you guys before we integrated with the masses," she said. "I'm gonna just lay it out there, I'm not exactly a beat around the bush type. You two seem to know everything about everyone and you're pretty honest. I know I haven't been here very long but I was hoping to talk to you guys about one of your friends."

"Oh," Chloe said, slowing to a stop. "Sure, go ahead."

"Can I ask you about Jessica?" Beca asked. Chloe and Stacie just grinned. This was good.

"What about her?" Chloe asked in a tone that indicated she knew very well what was coming.

"Well, I guess the first question would be is whether she's seeing anyone," Beca said. "And provided the answer was no, the second question would be whether she dates girls. Or would ever be open to dating a girl. Me, preferably."

"You're into Jessica?" Stacie said.

"I won't lie, there are a lot of attractive girls at this school, the both of you included," Beca said. "But I have a bit of a weakness for a blonde, and we've talked a bit and she's really cool, I'd like to see if there's something there."

"You're in luck," Chloe said. "Because she's not seeing anyone currently and she may have already asked Stacie about you."

"Oh did she now?" Beca asked. "That's a good sign for me, then."

"Well she just asked what I thought about you," Stacie said. "But I said I think you're pretty chill and you're interesting. So what, you're going to ask her out or something?"

"I'm hoping maybe to get to know her a bit better, like try and catch up with her at your party Friday," Beca said. "Talk to her about something not school related for a change. So she's into girls?"

"She's never really confirmed or denied anything," Stacie said, thoughtfully. "And she's not dated at all that I'm aware of, and I know her parents aren't really against it either, so I don't know exactly what the deal is there. My guess would be that she's probably bi, but also demi. So if you guys talk and have a connection that's going to be the more important part."

"Okay," Beca said. "Thanks." She left the headphones down and grabbed her bag, joining them.

"What's your deal though?" Chloe asked as they began to walk toward the gates. "If I stalk your Facebook I'm not going to find out that you're some kind of womaniser or serial hoe? Greenhill isn't littered with the broken hearts of a hundred women, is it?" Beca laughed.

"No way," she said. "I've only had two serious girlfriends. And if you need a personal reference I can provide one." Chloe laughed as they passed the front gates, Bumper calling something vaguely homophobic toward Beca. The smaller girl just flipped him the bird and kept walking. He was tame compared to that asshole Tom from her last school.

The night of Stacie's party Beca threw on some black skinny jeans and tugged a plaid shirt on over a faded tank. Her dad wasn't home, as per usual, but she texted him nonetheless. Sure she didn't really communicate well with him but that didn't mean she hated the guy.

_[Gone to hang out with some of my classmates. Will be home later.]_

She got one back a moment later.

_[Staying at Sheila's tonight. Don't drink and drive.]_

Beca just rolled her eyes. If her dad knew her even a little, he'd know she didn't even drink. But she texted him back with an assurance that she wouldn't do anything of the sort, then she grabbed her keys and set off on the forty minute drive between Greenhill and Barden. It wasn't a bad drive, and she also drove straight past a drive thru Taco Bell so she grabbed some food as well. By the time she got to the party it was underway but not crazy. Good timing. She went into the house and unfortunately the first people she ran into were Bumper and a couple of his cronies.

"Oh look, the dyke is here," Bumper said.

"Real original, asshole," Beca said, scanning the room for - well, anyone else really.

"Don't know why you'd bother coming to a party like this, we don't breed homos at Barden," he said. She turned and advanced on him.

"Why does it bother you so much who I have sex with?" she asked. "Is it because you're repressing your own latent homosexuality? Or is it bitterness because you know damn well that of all the girls at this party, 90% of them would rather come home with me than with you?"

"In your dreams, Mitchell," he said, though his buddies were hollering at him.

"Sorry Bumper, but she's probably right," came Stacie's voice as she sauntered into view. "You're a pretentious spoon-fed dick and Beca's independent, mysterious and has that rebel streak. It's not much of a contest. Plus she looks about sixty times better in a tank top." His buddies started another round of teasing.

"But cheer up, sunshine, there's good news," Beca said to him, "because if you keep practicing you might just get there one day and be able to suck your own dick since nobody else is ever going to do it for you." Everyone within earshot burst out laughing and Bumper turned bright red, slinking away.

"I like you," Stacie said with a slight slur. "You're cute and you have a hell of a lot of sass for someone in such a tiny package." Her eyes roamed over Beca appreciatively.

"Hey now," Beca said, "I know I said you were attractive the other day, but - correct me if I'm wrong - you're seeing that Donald guy. And that's a no go zone for me, Legs. I don't go after someone else's girl. Especially straight girls."

"I am seeing Donald," Stacie said. "And that's going pretty well for me."

"Plus," Beca added, "There is no way in hell I'd be able to keep up with you, Stacie." The taller girl erupted in laughter.

"At least you can admit it," she said.

"Okay, now that our mildly awkward flirting is out of the way," Beca said, "I brought you a little something." She produced the flash drive from her pocket.

"And what is this?" she asked.

"I asked your friends what some of your favorite songs are," Beca said. "Made you some mixes."

"Seriously?" Stacie said. "Beca, that's so cool. I'm gonna go put them on right now. Drinks in the kitchen okay?"

"Sure," Beca said. "Make good choices." She wandered into the kitchen, stopping to say hey to Cynthia Rose and her date Denise, and saw Jesse pouring beer from a keg.

"Hey Beca," he said. "Beer?"

"No thanks," she said. She surveyed the table of drinks. "Anything here without any alcohol?"

"Not a drinker?"

"Not in general," she said. "And never when I'm driving. Greenhill's forty minutes away, remember?"

"Oh yeah," he said. "Um, when I cleared the fridge out for Stace she made me put all the Dr Pepper in the second fridge in the basement, if that's more your style."

"Thanks, Jesse." She was about to head down there when she saw Jessica come in. The blonde looked over at her and they smiled at each other, so Beca took a deep breath and went over to say hello.

"Hi Jessica," Beca said. "Can I get you a drink?"

"Uh, I'm driving," she said a little nervously.

"Me too, but I know where Swanson stashed the Dr Pepper. I'm actually not much of a drinker, to be honest," she said. Jessica smiled at her.

"Neither am I," she confessed. "I normally offer to drive so I don't get hassled about getting wasted. Hangovers really mess with me and then that messes with a lot of other things. Work, softball…"

"So can I interest you in a Dr Pepper?"

"Yeah, sure," Jessica said. She blushed a little as Beca walked away. She'd been thinking about Beca more and more lately. The transfer student was definitely someone she was interested in, and that was kind of new for her. She'd been asked out before but hadn't really found herself interested in any of the offers, or found herself interested in making any offers of her own.

She soon found herself thinking about it, though, because Beca was cute and fascinating. Over the next few hours she discovered the shorter girl was a great listener and had a mildly self-deprecating sense of humor. Jessica hadn't laughed so much in her life. She'd asked the brunette about her tattoos, and discovered it wasn't just the two she could see, but two more.

Beca was pleased at how it was going. Jessica was really sweet. She loved her family a lot, and she was a positive and optimistic person in general. She didn't have a bad word to say about almost anyone, except Bumper Allen, which seemed to be a general consensus amongst most of the students. Jessica had asked about her tattoos, so she'd stripped the plaid shirt off and pulled up her tank a little to show off the one on her back. Then she pulled the strap down to reveal the flowers on her shoulder. She felt her breath hitch when Jessica's fingers lightly brushed the skin as she murmured something about the shading.

She saw Stacie watching them from across the room, the taller brunette winking at her, and Cynthia Rose walked past a couple of times to offer drinks if she was getting them for herself and Denise. She pulled her shirt back on and they kept talking, only now she was sure she wasn't imagining the fact that Jessica was standing a lot closer and the looks they shared felt a little more than just party chatter proximity. It was about quarter to midnight when Jessica realised that she had to leave.

"Curfew?" Beca asked.

"Not really," she said. "My folks actually wouldn't mind if I was out later, but I've got to work in the morning and I'd rather not be a zombie."

"Hey, where do you work?"

"At the Starbucks in town," Jessica replied. "You should drop by tomorrow. I promise I'll even give you a discount."

"Discounted caffeine? Deal," Beca said, rubbing the back of her neck awkwardly. "I had a lot of fun talking to you tonight."

"Yeah, me too," Jessica said, a light blush spreading across her cheeks. "If I didn't have work in the morning I'd stay later. But I need this job, keeps me in art supplies."

"I'd really like to do this again sometime," Beca said hopefully. "Maybe with less people and more of a… date type arrangement, if you'd be okay with that."

"Yeah, that would be nice," Jessica agreed. "Let me give you my number." Beca grinned as the blonde plugged her number into her cell.

"I'll see you soon?" Beca said. Jessica nodded and was just about to leave, turning at the last minute to peck her on the cheek. She felt the warmth of her lips for a moment, grinning before going off to find Jesse or CR.

She didn't stay much longer at the party, it was her experience that things just got out of hand after a certain point and the level of alcohol many of her classmates had consumed would definitely be pushing that limit. She realised for the first time that she hadn't seen Aubrey anywhere.

"Chloe," she said, spotting the redhead lining up some shots with Amy. "Aubrey doesn't like to party?"

"Aubrey's father would murder her for the very thought," Chloe said. "She's managed to sneak away once or twice, but she's more focused on schoolwork than parties." Beca nodded, she could understand that thinking. Then she double checked that CR and Denise were okay for a ride home before driving back to her place.

The house was dark and quiet as she unlocked the door, but she was used to it. She went upstairs and tossed around the idea of doing some homework, but figured bed would be a better idea since she had the whole weekend to do homework. After she changed and slid under the covers, she replayed the night with a smile on her face, deciding she'd drop by Starbucks in the morning to see Jessica.


	3. Chapter 3

Beca was back in Barden at just after ten am the following morning. She knew where the Starbucks was, she drove past it daily as she traveled to and from school. She parked in an open space down the street and walked back to the store. Instead of driving all the way to Barden just to talk to a girl, she'd brought some homework with her, figuring Starbucks was as good a place as any to get some work done.

Jessica was working the register as she arrived and the blonde smiled broadly as she came in. Beca met it with one of her own as she approached the counter.

"What can I get you?" Jessica asked.

"I'll take the biggest mocha you can muster up," Beca said. "It'll help me concentrate."

"What are you working on?"

"English Lit this morning," Beca said. "Maybe if I get bored I'll work on a mix or something." Jessica rang up her order, with the promised discount, and told Beca to take a seat and she'd bring it over in a minute.

"That's okay," Beca said. "I'll just wait for it."

"No I'm on break so I'll bring it over," Jessica said. "I've been here since six." Beca made her way to a big corner table with a power socket handy so she could plug her laptop in. Since Jessica would be joining her she decided to wait to spread her stuff all over the table.

She came over a moment later holding two cups and set one down in front of Beca as she took her seat. "I hope you don't mind me crashing your table for a few minutes."

"Of course not," Beca said. Jessica was wearing a hoodie over her uniform shirt, probably so she didn't get hassled by customers while she was on break. "Has it been busy today?"

"Saturdays are weird," Jessica said. "Especially this time of morning, it's either people who want to study - like you, who camp out at a table or just people who want to caffeinate and go - or there's the people who are stumbling home hungover."

"Very astute."

"Well, it's still a little bit too early for the brunch crowd and it's too late in the morning for the earlybirds," Jessica said. "Don't question it, it's just the way it is."

"I'll take your word for it," Beca replied. "So this is a pretty popular study spot?"

"Yeah," Jessica said. "Aubrey will be here soon, she likes to study out of the house whenever she can because she hates being at home with her dad and her mom is pretty busy most weekends with charity stuff and foundation stuff."

"People keep telling me that Aubrey's dad is this full psycho," Beca said.

"It's not that he's psycho," Jessica said, "He just expects perfection. Both of Aubrey's brothers graduated top of their class and went to Harvard, where they graduated top of their class. She's expected to do exactly the same."

"What's her mom like though?"

"Pretty nice actually," Jessica said. "But even she can't talk her dad around. I feel sorry for Aubrey. It must be super stressful."

"It sounds like it would be," Beca said. She paused for a moment. Her own grades and class ranking were pretty damn high, and the guidance counselor had implied that if she kept the same trajectory she could take top spot by Christmas break. But it meant literally nothing to her and everything to Aubrey. Then she shook her head and refocused on the girl on the other side of the table.

"Do you get on with your folks?" Beca asked.

"I do," Jessica said. "I know it's not exactly the norm, but they're pretty good so far as parents go. We're all pretty close, but that wasn't really a choice. With five kids, we're always in each other's space."

"You have four brothers and sisters?" Beca asked incredulously.

"Four brothers," Jessica corrected. "Two older and twin younger."

"Oh god, four brothers," Beca said. "That must be… interesting."

"Interesting is an understatement," Jessica said. "It's gotten easier to have some privacy since Jake and Chris went to college. But I do miss them an awful lot. We used to go to Panthers games together, all five of us. Now we don't get much time to watch sports together."

"You're a Panthers fan?"

"If you're not a Panthers fan, my grandfather will strike you out of his will," Jessica said with a fake solemn tone. "The whole family is. Do you follow football?"

"I don't really, not enough to barrack for a particular team," Beca said. "But I don't hate sports, it's just not what's on my radar. It's pretty much music for me." But wheels were turning in her head, because she had a very well connected friend in Greenhill who could get her tickets to Panthers games whenever she wanted. This was a fact she was all too aware of because he had pestered her to go and hang out with him on more than one occasion. And she also had this feeling like the Panthers may even be playing as early as this weekend, which would be a pretty good first date. Jessica was fiddling with the lip of her paper cup and had gotten uncharacteristically shy.

"So, were you serious about going out sometime?" she asked quietly.

"Of course I was," Beca said. "Maybe this weekend?" The blonde's face brightened.

"Yeah, sure," she said. "I was only going to be painting otherwise, but it might be nice to take a break from worrying about applications for a while."

"I don't even think you need to be worried," Beca said. "I mean I've only seen a little bit of your stuff but I thought it was awesome. I've got an idea for the weekend though, so leave it with me and I'll text you the details."

"I'm looking forward to it," Jessica said. She checked her watch and sighed. "I've got just enough time to duck to the bathroom and then back to work."

"I'll see you in an hour or so for a refill," Beca said. "And thanks for the cheap energy boost."

"Anytime," Jessica said with a smile, getting up from the table. Beca pulled her laptop over, opened it and plugged her headphones into it, ready to get into some homework. She always worked better with music on, so she hit play on something that would help her focus and opened the notes she had taken on her Lit paper so far.

She didn't even realise how long she sat there for, not until someone placed another cup in front of her. It was a short guy with a crew cut, but Beca looked up and thanked him, then glanced at the counter. Jessica mouthed that it was on her, so Beca thanked her as well. She plowed through her Lit work and then moved onto Politics, finding herself in the rhythm. Her phone buzzed a while later, Cynthia Rose asking what she was up to. She sent a text back saying she was at Starbucks and to come hang out if she wanted, the other girl texting and saying she'd be there shortly. Beca decided she'd earned a break from the homework and packed it all away, leaving just her laptop and headphones out so she could work on a mix while she waited. She looked up as Cynthia Rose approached the table, two coffees in hand. She smiled and tugged the headphones off, saving her work.

"How'd you pull up after last night?" Beca asked, after thanking her for the coffee.

"Okay," Cynthia Rose said. "Didn't drink much. But Denise and I, we're a proper thing now, so that's cool."

"That is cool," Beca said. "I'm happy for you guys."

"But more importantly than that," Cynthia Rose, "what's going on between you and Jess? Because she sent this coffee over here for you and you guys basically only had eyes for each other last night." Beca's eyes moved over to the blonde, who was serving a customer.

"Uh, yeah," Beca said. "Well, we did talk all night. And I asked her if we could go out sometime and she seems pretty into it, so that's a thing we're gonna do."

"Oh, serious?" Cynthia Rose said. "Hell yeah."

"I don't know how she'd feel about stuff getting out before we've actually managed to go on a date though, so-"

"You don't have to worry dude, I've got your back," Cynthia Rose said. "So what are you going to do?"

"Well she was just telling me that she hasn't been to a Panthers game in a while and she misses it," Beca said, "And I have a buddy who's dad is like, connection city, and he could get me tickets if I asked."

"She'd probably dig that," Cynthia Rose said. "Better than the same old movie and dinner, too."

"Yeah, I'll give Luke a text and see if he can hook me up," Beca said. "He'll probably make me trade him some new mixes or something, but that's a fair deal." She sent a message to Luke.

_Hey man, can you get Panthers tickets this short notice? Looking to take a girl out._

_For you Becky, anything._ She cringed at the use of 'Becky'. Luke was the only person in the world who called her Becky, and he did it now because he knew it pissed her off. He was one of her best friends from Greenhill, and if she was going to admit to missing anyone from her old school, it would have been him. Though he had also graduated the previous year, so it's not like they were hanging out regularly before she got expelled anyway.

_I'll trade you a flash drive of new mixes for two tickets._

Luke was a music junkie and the only person who Beca had trusted to listen to her music as she started taking it seriously and making her own stuff. He ran the radio station on campus at his university, playing her mixes constantly and was easily the most supportive person of her love of making music. He hounded her all the time for new material. It was ten minutes before he texted back.

_Who's your daddy? Two tickets for Saturday's game. I'll meet you at Hugo's at eight? We'll shoot some pool._

_Sure, and I owe you._ She liked the idea of shooting pool with Luke that night, it had been a while since they caught up.

She decided not to tell Jessica about her plans for their date until they were walking from lunch to Music on Tuesday. They'd lagged behind the others just a little so they could talk uninterrupted.

"So do you have plans for Saturday?" Beca asked. "I was thinking we could go to the Panthers game, catch dinner on the way back."

"You got tickets to watch the Panthers?" Jessica said. "Oh my god, of course, that'd be awesome."

"Sweet," Beca said. "Um, if you text me your address I'll pick you up?"

"It's a date," Jessica said. Beca waited for a few minutes.

"Have you, you know, told any of the others that we're going on a date?" Beca asked. "Not, like… I don't want to put pressure on you or anything. But I told CR, we're kind of bros I guess. And she won't say anything, she's-"

"Relax, Beca," Jessica laughed. "So Stacie and Chloe know, but that's it. They know everything, though. And I'm not ashamed of you or of us, but I'd prefer to keep it low key just until we find our feet, if that's okay with you?"

"Of course," Beca said. "I feel the same. But I'm looking forward to Saturday."

"Yeah, me too," Jessica said with a smile. Beca felt her stomach swoop. They entered the classroom and Beca took her seat between Stacie and Chloe. Both girls looked at her knowingly, but didn't say anything to her.

Stacie ended up accosting her the next morning, just to ensure that her date plan was solid and her intentions were good. Beca explained that they were just going to watch a game of football and have dinner, nothing weird or shady. Stacie was impressed with the plan, but then she turned serious.

"Look, Jessica is literally one of the nicest people on the planet," Stacie said. "So be good to her, okay? You don't strike me as an asshole, but I also don't know you that well. But I know her, and I like her."

"I swear I'll be good to her," Beca said. "I think she's really sweet and I know you don't know me but I'm not like that anyway."

"Good," Stacie said. "Wouldn't want to have to kill you."

On Saturday, Beca pulled up to Jessica's house and got out. She'd been to a football game with Luke before, but wasn't invested to the point where she'd bought any supporters apparel. But it was warm, so she was wearing a worn out button down with some shorts and her standard Converse. She knocked on the door, and a guy answered who looked a little like Jessica, but with dark hair. One of the twins, she guessed.

"Can I help you?" he asked, a faint look of recognition in his eyes.

"Yeah, I'm Beca," she said. "I'm here to pick Jess up." The boy held the door open and she went inside. Then he called up the stairs.

"Jess! Your ride's here!" After that, he looked at her curiously for another moment and then slouched away, just as footsteps sounded down the stairs.

She looked fantastic. All she was wearing was a Panthers jersey, short denim shorts and some kicks, with a cap on, but she looked perfect. Like she lived to be outdoors. She grinned widely as she saw Beca.

"Hi," she said.

"Hey," Beca said. "One of your brothers let me in, not sure if it was Trey or Grant." She was pleased she at least managed to remember her twin brothers' names. Jessica grabbed her purse and they headed outside and got into the car.

"I am so excited right now, it's been so long since I've managed to get to a game."

"I'm glad you were down to come," Beca said honestly. "I've actually got a friend who can get tickets to just about anything, Panthers games included."

"Do you keep in touch with many people from Greenhill?" Jessica asked.

"Some. Luke, the guy, he's in college now, and there's a handful of others," she said. "But it's okay, I actually kind of like most of the people here in Barden. Except that Bumper kid, he's such a fucking asshole."

"He is, I told you."

"He reminds me of the guy I punched in the jaw," Beca said. "That same entitled attitude. Doesn't bode well for him." Jessica laughed, and Beca turned the radio up so they could sing along.

When they got to the stadium, Jessica was excited by how good their seats were. Beca angled towards some refreshments, and the blonde argued with her about paying.

"No, Beca, you got these tickets, let me buy," she said.

"Yeah, but they were free," Beca said. "I asked you out on this date, so I'm paying."

"Fine, but next date is my treat," Jessica countered. Beca smiled at the idea that Jessica was thinking about a second date already.

"Deal," she said.

Beca could admit she didn't know much about football, but she knew she was having a great time. Jessica was certainly enthusiastic about it, and it was hard not to get swept up in it. Sometime in the third quarter, after they'd been standing and cheering a Panther touchdown, Beca let her hand rest on Jessica's knee. It was a subconscious gesture, and she almost pulled it away, but the blonde reached down and let her hand rest on top of Beca's, entangling their fingers.

The Panthers lost, by a small margin, but Beca didn't really care. Jessica spent the entire game with a huge smile on her face, and it was so radiant that it made butterflies erupt in Beca's stomach just to see it. They stopped for a quick bite on the way back, and the sun was just starting to go down as they pulled up back at her house. Jessica took her hand again as they walked back to her front door. They reached her porch. "Thanks for today, Beca."

"I had a lot of fun," Beca said.

"Me, too. It was really nice to get back to a game," she said, smiling widely. Beca couldn't help but stare at her. "What?"

"You're just really beautiful," Beca managed. "Sorry, I'm normally a little smoother than that. Just sort of came out." A deep blush spread across Jessica's cheeks and she stuck her hands in her pockets.

"You're sweet," Jessica said. "Can I tell you something?"

"Sure," Beca said.

"I don't really date," she confessed. "Boys or girls."

"Seriously?" Beca said. "You're like, gorgeous. And a lot of fun, and easy to talk to. Who wouldn't want to date you? What's wrong with everyone in Barden?"

"I've had… requests. But I never felt like taking any people up on it, til now," she said. "But you're kind of charming." She leaned on a pillar.

"Only kind of?" Beca asked with a twinkle in her eye. Jessica bit her lip and reached out for Beca's hand. Their fingers laced together, Beca stepping in a little closer.

"Can I see you tomorrow? I've got some stuff to work on at the studio downtown, but I'd like to buy you lunch," she said. "I owe you."

"Text me the address, I'll be there." Beca wanted to see the girl as soon as possible.

"And uh –" Jessica began. Beca looked at her. She didn't say anything else, but she leaned down and pressed her lips to Beca's. Beca gently put a hand on her hip, nothing skanky for a first date, and stepped into her a little more. She felt Jessica's lips part and their tongues met, just briefly, before they broke apart. They both smiled and leaned in again, sharing a few more kisses until Beca swore she saw movement at the window.

"Not to kill the moment," she said. "But I think someone's watching us at the window." Jessica rolled her eyes.

"Sorry," she said. "I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Definitely," Beca said. She kissed her on the cheek. "Tomorrow." She headed back to her car, Jessica watching from the porch with a tiny wave. She was just about to go inside when her mother came out.

"And who was that?" she asked.

"That was Beca," she said.

"Is Beca your girlfriend?"

"It's way too early for anything like that," she said. She was perfectly comfortable talking to her mom about these things. "She transferred in from Greenhill this semester. We spent all of Stacie's party talking last week and she asked me to the Panthers game."

"But you did kiss her," her mom teased.

"So she wasn't imagining the person in the window?" Jessica asked. "Jesus. Yeah I kissed her. She's cute and I like her a lot. We had a good time."

"She really was cute," her mom said. "If it turns into something, ask her to dinner."

"God, mom," she sighed, following her mom back inside.


	4. Chapter 4

The studio ended up being the top level of an art school in downtown Barden. The space wasn't specifically Jessica's, there was space allocated to a few different artists who had undergone tutelage there. Beca dropped by just before one o'clock, Jessica showing her what she was working on. Beca was again impressed with her work.

"I will never understand how you can look at those watercolors and then just make pictures like that happen," Beca said. "It's seriously awesome."

"Yeah, well, I can't understand how you hear two completely random songs and think that they'd go together perfectly, but you do," Jessica said.

"Touché," Beca said.

"Lunch?" Jessica said. "My treat. There's a pizza place down the street." They headed there together, Beca sensing that Jessica was still a little nervous and deciding not to take her hand. She didn't want to hurry the blonde into coming out, if she was even planning on coming out. They had plenty of time to talk about stuff like that. They got to the restaurant and headed for a booth in back, settling down and ordering their food.

"I had a lot of fun yesterday," Beca said. "I've been to a couple of football games with my friend Luke, but I never enjoyed them as much as I did when I was with you."

"I had fun too," Jessica said, blushing a little. She spotted something across the room.

"What?" Beca asked, following her eyes. "Oh." It was Chloe and Stacie, which wasn't a problem for them really. The two other girls already knew that they were seeing each other. But they were with Aubrey, and the three of them looked like they were headed over to say hi. Beca wondered for a moment if Aubrey was the kind of girl who would spread information like that around.

"It's fine," Jessica said before they reached the table. "I trust Bree." Beca just nodded and smiled at the intruders as they arrived and sat down for a moment.

"Hey," Jess said. "What's up?"

"Nothing much," Stacie said. "Bree finally tore herself away from the books so Chloe and I are dragging her out and then to the shops for some much needed R&R."

"I had to get that Lit paper done," Aubrey said. "It was a killer."

"Yeah, right?" Beca said. "I only finished mine yesterday." Aubrey nodded emphatically.

"See? Beca gets it. I still have so much AP work to do," she sighed.

"So do I," Beca said. "Hey, if you ever want a study buddy sometime, I'm up for it." Chloe was beaming at her.

"What?" Aubrey asked.

"Well, we take almost all of the same classes, the two of us are clearly both insane," Beca said. "Maybe we should study together sometime."

"Okay," Aubrey said. "That might be nice." Beca thought she didn't sound displeased with the idea, but she didn't sound thrilled either. The girls didn't stay long - they'd apparently been finishing up as the two of them had entered. Once they left Beca addressed Jessica.

"What's Aubrey's deal, man?" she asked. "I feel like I can't get a good read on her. She's just… uneasy. Like I know she's got all the pressure from her dad, but I feel like she's… not fake. That's not the right word. Guarded? But like to the extreme, like even repressing herself a little." Jessica thought for a moment.

"That wouldn't be entirely inaccurate," Jessica said. "Her dad doesn't encourage anything apart from academics. Even all her extra curriculars are academic. She is really nice, she's generous and she can even be pretty funny. But she rarely gets the opportunity to show it. She's way too worried about grades and college. I don't even remember the last time I saw her laugh."

"That's… kind of sad," Beca said. "Let me guess, her dad wants Ivy League?"

"Her dad is going to have a complete fit if she doesn't get accepted to Harvard," Jessica confirmed. "He's a Harvard educated lawyer, his father is a Harvard educated lawyer, you can follow."

"So Aubrey wants to be a lawyer?"

"No," Jessica said. "But she will be anyway." She returned to the pizza in front of her and Beca mused on that for a second. It was a little confusing to her why someone so smart and focused would spend all that energy going after something they didn't even want to do. But families were weird.

"Families are weird," she said. That brought a nod from Jessica, and she picked her slice back up.

They didn't stay at the pizza place too long, Jessica had a bit more work she wanted to get done and a late shift at Starbucks as well. But Beca kissed her at the door to the art studio and told her she'd see her the next day.

She headed home and pulled out some homework. Her dad wasn't home - not a real surprise - so she spread herself over the kitchen table and turned her music up. She began plowing through the work but she also thought momentarily that she would definitely see if Aubrey wanted to study together sometime. Surely her parents wouldn't see it as a social activity if it was clear that they were both taking the same subjects. And it wasn't even that she thought either of them needed the help, she just knew sometimes it helped having someone else there.

She broached the topic with the guarded blonde on Monday. She was sitting with a group of people at lunch, including Cynthia Rose, Stacie, Amy, Jessica and Aubrey. She and Jessica hadn't exactly made any kind of announcement about their relationship, but it was fairly evident to the people around them that they were moving well past friends.

"Hey Aubrey," Beca said. "How are you going with that Government assignment?"

"It's not exactly a fun time," she said, making a face.

"If you want, I was thinking maybe we could hang out sometime this week and work on them?" Beca said. "I know they're single assignments but it might help if we have someone to bounce ideas off." Chloe was looking at Aubrey expectantly, hoping the blonde would take a chance and make a friend out of Beca.

"Sure," she said. "Um, not today, but maybe tomorrow?"

"Yeah for sure," Beca said. "We can hang out at Starbucks or at your place, save you driving to Greenhill?"

"Starbucks is fine," Aubrey said. Jessica reached a hand toward Beca under the table and rested it on her knee. She felt good about going to study with Aubrey. Everyone seemed to give her the impression that Aubrey was super stressed out and that it was just an assumed fact of life that she would always be that way. That didn't really jive with her, she knew there had to be something that made her happy, and she wanted to help Aubrey find that out for herself.

She got to Starbucks first the next afternoon and scoped out the biggest table out of the ones that were free. She already knew she liked to spread out when she was studying, so if Aubrey was the same they would need the room. Jessica had gotten a ride with her, since she had to work that afternoon, the two of them chatting on the drive over.

"It's nice of you to reach out to Aubrey," Jessica said. "She doesn't make friends easily, and with all the classes you guys have in common she might actually make the effort with you."

"From what I can gather about her, she's smart, under pressure and probably lonely," Beca said. "I can sympathise with some of that. I had a couple of friends at Greenhill but none really in my grade. Plus my dad was the kind of teacher who tried too hard to be cool, which I'm sure you can imagine, doesn't endear someone to the other students. Then there was the whole being gay thing. Barden is a lot more chill about that, I can promise you."

"Was it hard for you?" Jessica asked.

"Well, yes it was," Beca said. "But I had Luke and a couple of the guys. I had Karla - til we broke up - and yeah, I'm not really bothered by what idiots like Tom think of me. It could feel never-ending at times, but it's done now."

Jessica had kissed her quickly and left her to it, Beca promising to come get coffee as soon as Aubrey got there. She didn't have to wait long, it was about another ten minutes or so before the other girl showed up.

"Hey," Beca said. "Want some coffee? My treat."

"Sure," Aubrey said. "Nonfat latte please." Beca headed up to the counter. Aubrey watched as the brunette flirted with Jessica over the counter and waited for their drinks. She thanked Beca as she was handed her latte, but instead of diving straight in to their homework she chose to make some small talk.

"How are you finding Barden?" Aubrey asked.

"Not so bad," Beca said. "School is school, but at least I'm not getting hassled regularly about being a lesbian. Barden's more tolerant like that. People just do what they want and don't really care about everyone else's private lives quite so much."

"That's true," Aubrey said.

"And everyone's really nice," Beca said. "Except Bumper and his little dickhead friends." Aubrey smiled a little.

"He really is a piece of shit," Aubrey said. Beca didn't think she'd ever heard Aubrey say anything like that about anyone before. "My dad and his dad tried to set us up once and I almost puked on his shoes when he mentioned it."

"Oh god," Beca said. "I can't imagine what kind of poor girl he'll end up dating." They fell into silence and Beca tugged her books out of her bag.

"So are you and Jessica dating?" Aubrey asked quietly as she opened her own books. Beca looked up at her in surprise. She paused for a moment but then remembered that Jessica had already said that she trusted her.

"We've been out," Beca admitted. "No actual discussion about dating status yet, but I think it's pretty solid. We're not exactly shouting it out from the rooftops just yet, we want to make sure it's a thing first."

"Okay," Aubrey said. "You're not… just, be nice to her okay? She's such a sweetheart and I'm sure you're not a dick, but -"

"But I'm the new chick and Jess is literally the nicest person in the universe," Beca said. "I get it."

"Heard that speech a few times?" Aubrey asked.

"Yeah, Stacie and Chloe," Beca said. "And I'll tell you the same thing I told them. I'm not like that, and I intend on treating her properly."

"Good," Aubrey said. She finally picked up her pen. "So this assignment is a piece of work, right?" Beca grinned and they quickly talked about the assignment before they got stuck into the respective papers. It was easier to work through it with another person there. They could at least stop and ask each other questions, and by the time they figured they should be getting home, they'd made significant progress.

"We should do this again sometime," Aubrey said. "I don't study with the others much. Sometimes Stacie and I do, but you and I are taking a lot of the same classes."

"Sure, anytime," Beca said. "Seriously. If I'm not studying or hanging out with Jess, I'm goofing around with music. I'm down whenever you are."

"Okay," Aubrey said. "I'll see you tomorrow." She left and Beca took a second to see Jessica before she left, the two of them organizing a date for the following night.

When Beca got home, she was surprised to see that her dad's car was actually in the driveway. She pulled up behind him and headed inside, hearing that he wasn't the only one there. It didn't really bother her either way, Sheila was nice enough she just didn't have much to do with the other woman.

"Hey," she said to them both as she passed through the kitchen.

"You only just getting home?" her father asked.

"Yeah, I hung around and studied with Aubrey," Beca said. "She and I are taking almost identical course loads."

"Oh yeah?" Sheila asked. "That's nice. So you've settled in okay?"

"Yep," Beca said. "No homophobic jocks trying to shove their junk in my face or anything." Her dad rolled her eyes.

"It wasn't like that," he said. Beca didn't want to fight with her dad, but the one thing that absolutely drove her crazy was his refusal of what Tom had done to her.

"He literally forced my face into his crotch after telling me I should give him a blow job to make sure I was gay," Beca sighed. "But whatever. I still don't regret punching him." She grabbed some water and an apple and headed up to her room, hearing her dad and Sheila dissolve into discussion as she left.

She didn't feel like doing any more homework after that exchange so she opened her laptop and worked on some music for a while, until there was a tap on the doorframe. She looked up and saw that it was Sheila.

"Hi," the woman said. "Got a sec?" Beca nodded and gestured to the bed for her to sit down.

"What's up?" Beca asked.

"Um, we've never really talked," Sheila said. "But what you were saying before? That happened? Your dad never really talked about it."

"It wasn't even that it was a one off thing," Beca shrugged. "That guy and his friends tortured me daily for years, Sheila. The words I could shrug off, but I will not let some entitled asshole put his hands on me like that."

"I'm a little surprised that the school didn't take the whole thing a lot more seriously than that," Sheila said.

"Well I can't figure that one out either," Beca said. "So when I decked him it was pretty much a given that I was getting kicked out, but Dad didn't even come to my defense. But it's nothing, whatever. I'm happy now."

"I didn't even know you, you know, dated girls," Sheila said. "Met any nice girls at Barden?"

"I might be seeing a girl," Beca said. "We've hung out a few times. She's an artist, very sweet."

"That's nice," Sheila said. "I won't bug you any longer. I just feel like your dad is at my place so much that I've never really had the opportunity to actually talk to you properly."

"Yeah," Beca said. "Any time. I'm not really against to having you guys around." Sheila excused herself, and Beca wondered for a second what that had been about. She hoped it was just what it appeared to be - Sheila wanting to actually have a conversation with her. She assumed it was that, plus partly her dad wanting to know something, which ended up being a good assumption because he was at her door a moment later.

"Hey," he said. "Got a minute?" Beca repeated the process of gesturing to the bed.

"What's up dad?"

"Sheila just told me that you and her talked about you - you know."

"Being gay? Getting bullied and assaulted for being gay? Getting kicked out of school for defending myself against said bully? Or starting to date a girl at Barden?"

"I guess, all of that," he said. "I'm not very good with raising a girl, Beca. That was really your mom's domain. Even less with a girl who dates girls."

"It's not hard," Beca said pointedly. "Love and support, you know, the basics."

"But what she pointed out is that I really dropped the ball with Tom and defending you against the school board," he said. "I guess I was scared. Of losing my job. Which is actually kind of stupid because in the process I've managed to drive a big wedge between us."

"Yeah, well it's hard for me to come to you when I don't feel like you support me," Beca said frankly. "Case in point - you've come up here because Sheila and I had a conversation. But I already told you all of that stuff. Repeatedly. For months, often while crying, and your response was that I was overreacting." He sighed.

"I am not good at this," he mumbled to himself. "Dinner in ten, okay? I don't know how I'm gonna fix this Beca, but I do love you."

"Yeah, I love you too," she said. He got up and left. Beca sighed. She did love her dad and she knew he wasn't a bad guy, but that didn't magically make his lack of support for her disappear. Especially the fact that Tom hadn't just provoked her in a one off event, it was constant.

She managed to be pleasant throughout dinner but retired to her bedroom soon after - more homework to do, and she was almost done with a mix. She worked solidly for a couple of hours, hoping to get as much done as possible so she didn't have to rush her date with Jessica the next night. She also texted back and forth with Cynthia Rose, who wanted to get together on the weekend, which she was down for. Apparently there was some kind of band comp a couple of towns over and she wanted to go check it out.

When she did finally shut all of her stuff down and shower before crawling in to bed, she couldn't help but wonder how different her life might have been if she'd never punched Tom, never got kicked out of Greenhill. She'd probably still be getting picked on every day, which didn't sound like fun. And she'd also still be without Luke and Isaac and Henry and the guys, because they were all in college now.

She ultimately decided that she didn't regret it, even though it had effectively killed her already tenuous relationship with her dad. Because at least she could walk down the halls at Barden and not be apprehensive about what might happen to her or who might be waiting around the corner. And she had some friends already, and a girl who was sweet and pretty and maybe her girlfriend. She snuggled further down into her bed and let herself drift off to sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

The next few weeks went steadily for Beca. School was the same as it always was. In the afternoons she studied - she even studied with Aubrey kind of regularly now, at least once a week anyway - and hung out with Jess when she wasn't working. Things with Jessica were going pretty well, in Beca's opinion. Beca had taken to dropping past the studio occasionally and sitting in a corner out of the way while Jessica painted and she either worked on a mix or studied.

People were aware that they were together now. They hadn't exactly been hiding it, but it was out there for everyone to see. Not that anyone really cared. Almost nobody even batted an eyelid in their direction, except for Bumper Allen.

"That's not about you," Jessica said after yet another vicious spray on their way to lunch. "I turned Bumper down for Homecoming and prom last year. He didn't take it well, especially when I ended up coming stag to both."

"First time I met Bumper I told him to go fuck himself in front of his friends, and then at Stacie's party I told him with practice he might figure out how to suck his own dick," Beca said, "since it would be more likely that almost all of the girls at Barden would rather come home with me and not him. All of which was overheard by his friends and Stacie, who told him I was right." Jessica laughed so hard she had to wipe tears from her eyes.

"So maybe it is a bit about you," she said. "Wow."

"He asked you to Homecoming _and_ prom?" Beca asked. "Dude." She held the door to the cafeteria open for Jessica.

"He doesn't take rejection very well," Jessica said. "I told him no for Homecoming, and when I showed up on my own he was all angry because he thought I should, like, be flattered that someone like him would ask me. So when he asked me to prom and I said no, he was even more angry because the last time I had basically implied I'd rather be on my own than with him. So when I showed up to prom stag, he lost it."

"Because you were smart enough to go stag to something instead of with a guy you don't like?" Beca asked. "Dude's unhinged."

"And like I said, I don't date," Jessica said. "I didn't want my first dating experience to be Bumper Allen. I didn't even have anything to do with him before he asked me out."

"Good call," Beca said. They got in line for their lunches and then made their way to a table, Cynthia Rose and Amy sitting on one side, Donald and Jesse at the other.

"Hey," Amy said, noting their slightly down expressions. "What's up with you guys?"

"Nothing," Jessica said. "Just Bumper being an asshole, as usual."

"Again?" came Stacie's voice as she dropped down next to her boyfriend. Aubrey was close behind. "Maybe you guys should say something."

"He isn't getting to us," Beca said.

"Not really the point, though, Shorty," Amy said. "Barden's got a zero tolerance policy for harassment. Sexual orientation is covered. He shouldn't get away with it just because you don't give a shit."

"Maybe," Beca said offhandedly.

"It's about the example," Jesse offered. "Because you and Jess can just blow it off. But what about the freshman kid who sees you two getting ragged on daily and figures it isn't safe to come out?" Beca could see his point, but it still made her uneasy.

"We'll talk about it," Jessica said. She reached a hand out to Beca's knee and squeezed it gently. She could tell the smaller girl was a little on edge about the conversation although she wasn't sure why, but she figured they could talk about it later.

Beca stayed kind of quiet during the lunch period. She still answered when spoken to, but she wasn't as engaged as she normally was. About fifteen minutes before it ended, Jessica tugged her up and they left the cafeteria together. She found a quiet spot out by the English building.

"You okay?" Jessica asked.

"What?" Beca asked.

"Are you okay?" Jessica repeated. "Since they all started saying we should report Bumper you've got kind of quiet."

"Yeah," Beca said. She was fidgeting with her hands. "I know we probably should say something. But that's just kind of how things started going from bad to worse at Greenhill, you know?" Jessica sat down on a step and Beca sat next to her.

"Tell me about it," Jessica said.

"I thought I was doing the right thing," Beca said. "I still maintain that I was doing the right thing by going to the principal. He promised he'd take care of it, and he hauled Tom and his friends into his office, but I knew that he'd done nothing except give them my name. Because after that it just got worse. Instead of just giving me a hard time when they saw me, they'd go out of their way to find me. It was relentless."

"I'm so sorry, Beca," Jessica said gently.

"The only time they left me alone was when I was with Luke," Beca said. "It didn't matter what teachers saw. Nobody did a damn thing about the teasing, the innuendo, the graffiti on my locker, leaving lesbian porn on my desk, none of it. Not even my dad. So as much as I don't want Bumper to give us shit, you especially because you've never done anything to anyone, I guess I'm afraid of what happens if we do. Which I'm well aware doesn't make sense with this supposed tough girl image I have."

"It's okay to be afraid," Jessica said. "But there are a few differences. One, you don't just have Luke. You have me, and the others as well. Bumper might think he's god, but nobody else here does. Two, Barden will actually do something about it. They're actually really proactive with all this sort of stuff. You missed it because you were at Greenhill, but the first week of school is always packed with seminars about discrimination and harassment, online stuff, social media and all that." She wrapped an arm around Beca.

"Okay," Beca said. "It's just… hard. Not to mention Principal Wallace isn't a fan already."

"I'll be right there with you," Jessica said. "I'll go to him. You don't even have to be there if you don't want."

"We should do it together," Beca said. Jessica leaned in and kissed her softly.

"Then we'll do it together," Jessica promised. Beca kissed her again, her lips lingering on the blondes for a moment.

"Thanks," Beca said. She leaned her head down on Jessica's shoulders a few minutes. The other girl hummed softly and kept her arm wrapped around her.

"I'll drop into the office after last period and see when he can see us," Jessica said as they finally got up. She slid her hand into Beca's as they made their way to the next class.

She had a study date with Aubrey that afternoon, and for some reason the blonde was also curious about her quiet lapse at lunch.

"Hey Beca?" Aubrey asked as she set down coffees for each of them.

"Yeah?" Beca asked.

"Are you... Like, okay?" she asked. "You seemed a little uncomfortable at lunch."

"Uh, yeah," Beca replied, twirling her pen in her fingers. "I know everyone meant well before when we were talking about Bumper but it just brought back bad memories for me. It was kinda rough at Greenhill and when I tried to involve faculty it just got worse."

"How bad is worse?" Aubrey asked.

"The usual. Writing stuff on my locker, saying shit to me, leaving lesbian porn on my desk, sticking naked pictures of girls all over the windscreen of my car," Beca rattled off. "Just being crude and vulgar every second of the day. Tom was by far the worst."

"I'm sorry you had to experience that," Aubrey said. "But your dad didn't do anything?"

"My dad still thinks it was right for Greenhill to expel me," Beca said. "He never- " she shook her head.

"Sorry," Aubrey said automatically.

"No, it's fine," Beca said. "It just gets me worked up all over again. Because dad keeps saying he wants to fix things between us, sending his girlfriend to help mend fences or whatever, but he's never even apologised for taking the schools side."

"Seriously?

"No," Beca said softly. "And I get it. That's his place of employment or whatever. But the second Tom put his hands on me, the second he tried to shove his dick in my face, it should have been about me."

"I don't think it's unfair to feel as though he should apologise," Aubrey said. "At the very least."

"It just makes everything so much harder," Beca said, for some reason letting herself actually talk about it for once instead of bottling it up. "Like he's always saying he wants to have a better relationship with me but I don't feel like I can talk to him at all, you know?"

"Because you came to him with something that was big, and important, and really affecting you, and he dismissed it," Aubrey said.

"Exactly. But he didn't just dismiss it, he dismissed me. Because I'm gay and that's what started this whole thing off," she ranted. "And I don't care that there are people out there who think it's weird or unnatural or anything. But that's my dad. And his paycheck shouldn't rank above me."

"And then, of course, when you don't feel like you can go to your dad with anything, it feels very isolating and you just feel... disappointed," Aubrey said. Beca looked up at Aubrey. "That one I can relate to."

"People have told me things in passing about your dad," Beca said. "Mainly that you're under a lot of pressure. But I wouldn't presume to pass judgment."

"Pressure is putting it nicely," Aubrey said, finally sharing something personal about her family life. "I had to convince him that you're someone worth studying with before he'd even let me come."

"What does he think of the others then?"

"He approves of Stacie because she's a science geek and she's also a chess player," Aubrey said. "Chloe gets a pass because our parents have known each other forever and we've been friends since we were four. Everyone else is... tolerated. And that's a loose application of the word."

"So if he found out that I was kicked out of Greenhill?"

"He thinks you've moved because Barden offers better AP timetabling," Aubrey admitted with a smile. That made Beca laugh, and they returned to their work. By the time they left each others company, Beca had felt like she'd actually made a friend out of Aubrey.

Jessica had told her that Principal Wallace would see them the next morning before class. So she met Jessica out the front of the admin building, a little nervous about being back in his office. But Jessica assured her she'd do all the talking, so she felt a lot better about it. He showed them in and they sat down.

"What can I do for you ladies this morning?" he asked.

"Well, sir, we've come to speak to you about something that's not entirely pleasant," Jessica said. She didn't sound nervous in the slightest. "I don't know that it's well known amongst the faculty that Beca and I are dating. We're not exactly shoving it in people's faces or anything. But we're having a recurring problem with a student saying incredibly offensive and degrading things to us every single time we see him. We have plenty of witnesses to his behavior if needed."

"What kinds of offensive and degrading things?" he queried. Jessica gave him the uncensored version of Bumper's commentary to them over the past couple of weeks, the man scratching notes as she went.

"And which student is this?" he asked.

"Bumper Allen sir," Jessica said. "And it may even have a little to do with the fact that I twice turned him down for a date. We're not looking for expulsion or anything drastic, but as you well know his behavior contravenes the Barden student code of conduct."

"Well," he said, "it indeed does. I will speak with Mr Allen and suggest he learn to speak to other students in a more respectful manner, or keep his mouth shut."

"Thank you sir," Jessica said.

"Yes, thank you," Beca said with a clear note of surprise. The principal looked at her for a moment.

"Is there anything else?" he asked.

"No, thank you," Jessica said. "We'll be on our way."

"I'd like a moment with Miss Mitchell," Principal Wallace said. Beca felt a knot forming in her stomach but told Jessica she'd catch up. While the blonde excused herself, the man used his intercom to ask the woman at the reception desk to find out what class Bumper Allen had first period and summon him to the office before it began.

"I thought it might be prudent for me to follow up with you," he said. "I think at our first meeting both of us may have misjudged the other."

"Sir?" she asked, confused.

"The letter from your father requesting your transfer indicated that you were somewhat of a magnet for trouble," he said. "I may have let that color my perception of you, and I'd like to apologise."

"I appreciate that," Beca said. "And for what it's worth, I can be very defensive about certain topics so I apologise also."

"You seemed surprised when I said I was going to take care of the situation," he said. "Bumper isn't exactly a model student."

"Would you mind if I was just completely frank about the matter?" Beca said. He gestured for her to continue. "Once I informed faculty about the bullying I experienced at Greenhill, it just got worse. Considerably worse. But my father didn't want to jeopardise his teaching position. So on any given day I was shoved, abused, had slurs written on my locker, people left porn on my desk, glued pictures of naked women to my car… I also once found a photoshopped picture of my face on an extremely graphic image stuck on a board in the music room."

"That all happened?" he asked with a note of amazement.

"Regularly," she said. "So yes, it surprised me that your first reaction was to believe us and deal with Bumper."

"Well, like I said, Bumper isn't an angel," he said. "Jessica is a model student, and since you've arrived, all your teachers find you intelligent and polite, if not a little stubborn."

"That would be a fair assessment."

"We take equality and matters of bullying and harassment very seriously at Barden," he said. "I'm sorry Greenhill couldn't offer you the same courtesy. But you do have my word, Ms Mitchell. He will not become a nuisance."

"I really appreciate that," she said.

"Now, unless you'd like to run into Bumper, I might suggest you leave," he said. Beca nodded and thanked him again on the way out. Jessica was waiting, anxious to hear what had gone on after she left the room. Beca filled her in as they walked toward their respective homerooms, explaining that it looked like she and Principal Wallace had buried the hatchet somewhat.

"But you feel better about Bumper and everything?" Jessica asked.

"Yeah, I do," Beca said. "Thanks for doing that."

"It was as much for me as it was for you," Jessica said. They reached her homeroom door and Beca kissed her quickly on the cheek before she went to her own homeroom. Chloe, Stacie and Aubrey were waiting to find out how their morning meeting had gone.

"It went fine," Beca said. "Wallace is handling it, and I believe he actually will handle it. I get the impression that Bumper isn't exactly a favorite student of his."

"Bumper?" Stacie said. "Hell no. Pulled four times from starting position on the football team because of academic performance, spends at least one day a week in detention because of his smart mouth and is just a routine dick to anyone. He thinks he's untouchable because his dad's a member of the school board, but the way my mom tells it, even his dad thinks he's an insufferable piece of shit."

"Well, he said he'll handle Bumper," Beca said. "And I know I was a bit… hesitant when you guys all brought it up yesterday, but thanks. For supporting us."

"Any time," Chloe beamed. Beca walked with Aubrey to their first class. Aubrey was quiet on this particular morning, but that wasn't entirely unusual. Chloe had been very forthcoming with details about Aubrey once she'd learned that Beca intended on befriending her. One was that if she was feeling pressure or stress, she was likely to clam up. She processed all her stuff internally, without drawing attention or creating fanfare. So Beca was happy to let her remain silent.

It only took until lunch for Beca to see that Wallace had dealt with Bumper. She passed him in the hallway en route to another class and the boy hadn't so much as glanced at her, whereas he previously would have leapt at the opportunity to say something vulgar to her. At lunch, as they sat around their table, Bumper sat at his table with his regular clique, but with his back to them.

"So you know how I know everything?" Jesse said in a low tone. They all rolled their eyes. Jesse did actually know all the gossip at any given time in the school which was both impressive and annoying, since he liked to remind them of that as often as possible.

"Yeah," Stacie said.

"I heard that Bumper got told if he comes near Beca and Jess, makes a single remark, he gets a twenty day suspension," Jesse said.

"That's pretty serious," Chloe said. "But he already had one this calendar year, right?"

"If he gets another twenty day suspension during this year, he loses his football spot," Jesse confirmed. Beca was impressed. It looked like rules were actually enforced at Barden.

When she got home that afternoon, Sheila and her father were there. She made sure she stayed to say hello and catch up with them for a few moments before she disappeared.

"How was school?" Sheila asked.

"Pretty good actually," Beca said. "There was this guy giving Jess and I a hard time, and Principal Wallace sorted him out today, and he didn't even so much as look at us all day. It was nice to not feel that target on my back."

"That's good," Sheila said. But her father had a funny look on his face.

"Yes," he said shortly. "Good." Sheila sensed that he'd suddenly changed his mood and Beca excused herself to shower and berate herself at the stupidity of bringing up her being gay and bullied at school in front of her father and expecting anything different.


	6. Chapter 6

School became almost pleasant now that Bumper was steering clear of her and Jess. There were two things that had been plaguing at her thoughts, however. One was that Aubrey seemed to have retreated back into her shell. They still studied together, albeit with less frequency. But they'd been chatting a little, Beca learning a bit about Aubrey and vice versa. Now Aubrey was back to talking about schoolwork only, nothing else. She figured something was up, but she didn't want to pry, she figured she might just make mention of it to Chloe sometime soon.

The other thing was Jess. They were still hanging out a lot, dating, whatever. But it was starting to feel… more platonic than it should. There was nothing explicitly wrong. She still liked the girl a lot, but it was like there was something not quite right. And she thought Jess might be able to tell, because even though they did hang out a lot, there was less of the coupley stuff. They still talked a lot, laughed a lot, but the rest of it was lagging.

One afternoon, Beca offered to drive Jessica to Starbucks after school. The blonde accepted. Just before they turned the car off, though, she spoke.

"Beca, I think we need to talk," she said. She sounded incredibly nervous.

"Sure," Beca said, killing the engine. "What's on your mind?"

"We are," she said. "I don't want to seem like an asshole. I'm not an asshole. But I feel like… I don't know. Like there's something that might be missing with the dating thing?" Beca let out a sigh of relief.

"You do?" she asked.

"Yeah," Jessica said. "I still like you, and I like spending time with you, I just - I don't know."

"Hey," Beca said. "Don't freak out, I was kind of thinking the same thing. Like maybe the spark just isn't there? I mean, yeah we hang out a lot and there was nothing wrong with the kissing, but it's just not there, is it?" Jess looked immensely relieved.

"So you don't hate me?" she said.

"No," Beca said. "Not at all. We were good together, but I think it's better if we maybe just be friends?"

"I think so," Jessica said. "I don't regret this, mind you. It was a nice first foray into dating. And dating girls on top of that. So… thanks, I guess. I could have done a lot worse."

"So we're still friends?" Beca asked.

"Definitely," Jessica said. "I want to hang out with you, you're still one of the coolest people I've ever met." She leaned over and kissed Beca on the cheek.

"And thanks for the ride. Are you coming in for coffee?"

"Yeah," Beca said. "One for the road." She followed Jess into the store, feeling really good about how they'd left things. She knew that despite the tendency of people to break up and not stay friends, she and Jess would be fine. So she bought her coffee and told Jess she'd see her the next day before she headed home.

Sheila and her dad were there, apparently they were going to be cooking dinner a bit later. She came in and spent a few minutes with them before she had to go upstairs and do some homework.

"So," Sheila said. "How's the girl?"

"You're seeing a girl?" her dad asked. Beca managed not to roll her eyes.

"I was," she said. "Jess and I talked today and we think we might be better off as friends."

"Oh, I'm sorry," Sheila said.

"No, it's fine," Beca said. "We both agreed that there was something missing. The spark, you know? We really will stay friends, I don't doubt it."

"That's nice then," Sheila said. "What are you going to be working on this afternoon?"

"Whatever book I pick up first when I stick my hand in," Beca said unenthusiastically. "I've got a lot to do today."

"We'll let you know when dinner is ready," her dad said. She grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and headed upstairs. Her Chem book was the first one she landed on, so she tugged it out and quickly changed out of her uniform and into something comfortable. Then she turned some music on and started studying.

The next morning Cynthia Rose found her before school. Beca wasn't surprised to hear that it had already started making its way through their social circle that she and Jessica had broken up. She expected Jessica would tell Chloe straight away, because Chloe was the person everyone seemed to tell everything to. She wasn't upset at it, either, because it meant she didn't have to tell anyone.

"You okay?" Cynthia Rose asked.

"Yeah, dude, I am," she said. "Honest. We were both kinda feeling like it was nice and all, but it lacked a little chemistry. And that's something you need. So we decided we'd go back to being friends, which won't even be hard because Jess is pretty cool. So, yeah, I promise, I'm fine. It was all very mutual."

"Okay," she said. "But if you get a bit bummed out about it later, you call me and we'll chill."

"Thanks," Beca said. She slowed to a stop at her locker. "I'll catch you later." She opened her locker and sorted out which books she'd need before first break. As she slammed the metal door closed, she jumped a mile when she saw Aubrey standing behind it.

"Holy mother of god!" she exclaimed. "Shit, Aubrey, are you a ninja? Because you were not there like three minutes ago. Jesus, I'm dying here."

"I hear you broke up with Jessica," Aubrey said coolly. Beca immediately caught the tone in her voice.

"It was mutual, actually," Beca said carefully.

"You better not have hurt her, Beca," she warned. "I mean it."

"Uh, we agreed that we'd be better off as friends," Beca said. "What does it matter to you?"

"It matters to me because Jessica deserves more than to be treated like shit by some attention seeking transfer," Aubrey said.

"Whoa, will you back the fuck off?" Beca said, raising her voice. "It's none of your god damned business why Jess and I broke up, and you totally don't get to start throwing bullshit accusations like that around!"

"What's going on here?" interrupted a voice. It was Jessica.

"Just making sure Beca understands that she can't treat good people badly," Aubrey said.

"Who said she did?" Jessica asked. "Do I look upset to you? Beca didn't do anything wrong, and she certainly didn't treat me like shit. Bree, you're better than that. We just felt like the spark wasn't there. And we're still friends, truly." The blonde didn't say anything, just kept staring at Beca with cold eyes.

"Right," she said. "Jess, I'll see you in Music. Aubrey, thank you for making this morning a motherfucking delight." She stalked away and Aubrey immediately leaned against the locker with her eyes closed.

"Dammit, Aubrey, what was that?" Jessica said. "I don't need you defending me against something that never even happened. We left things on really great terms."

"Something about her just does not sit right with me," Aubrey muttered. Jessica watched Aubrey's eyes follow after the shorter girl who was carving a path through the students, and realised what was happening.

"Oh, god, Aubrey."

"What?" Aubrey asked.

"You have a crush on Beca," she said quietly.

"Um, what?" Aubrey said. "No."

"Yeah, you do," Jessica said.

"Please. Imagine what my dad would do if I brought someone like her home?" she retorted, though she was failing miserably at hiding how she really felt.

"Screw your dad," Jessica said.

"I can't be gay, Jess," Aubrey whispered, almost desperately. "I just can't." The other girl smiled at her sympathetically.

"Aubrey, honey, everything will be okay."

"Nothing about that would be okay," she said, now panicking hard. Her breathing grew rapid and she began to pale. Jessica hurried her into the bathroom across the hall in case she was going to start vomiting.

"Calm down," she said soothingly. "Take some deep breaths." She waited until Aubrey had returned to a normal color. She looked at Jessica in the mirror. She needed this conversation to never have happened.

"Don't worry," Jessica said. "I won't say anything. And if you do need to talk to someone about… you know. Anything. I'm here for you, okay?" Aubrey just looked down, so Jessica squeezed her arm and left her there. When she was gone Aubrey looked back up at herself in the mirror. The girl in the glass looked scared.

"I can't be gay," she said to herself. "I can't be."

Beca wasn't surprised to see that Aubrey pretty much had relegated her back to not speaking to her at all. But she didn't care in the slightest, as far as she was concerned the blonde had crossed a line and until she got an apology, she wasn't interested in trying to befriend her. Due to this, she found herself sitting at a different lunch table, with Cynthia Rose, Amy and a few of the others. Jessica did stop by to make sure she was okay, which was nice, and said that she'd spoken to Aubrey.

"Aubrey went off on you?" Cynthia Rose asked.

"Yeah dude, she basically said that I treated Jess like shit and that I'm nothing but an attention seeker," she said. "Neither of which are true."

"Damn," Cynthia Rose said. "I wonder what got up her ass."

"I don't even care," Beca said. "I fucking tried with her. I was patient, tried to get her out of the house to study, interact with other humans. But if gets me that, it ain't even worth it."

By the end of the day, she'd forgotten about Aubrey. They'd normally be studying together that afternoon, but instead she headed straight home to work on her own. She'd been going for about forty minutes when her phone buzzed. It was Chloe.

 _I take it you & Bree aren't study buddies any more. _Beca rolled her eyes.

_Nope. I thought we were getting to be friends, but apparently I treat girls like shit. All good. I don't have time for shit like that, she can think what she likes._

_I don't think she actually thinks that._

_Who can fucking tell what she's thinking? She never lets any little piece of herself out. She might not think I treat people like shit, but she actually treated me like one when she made unfounded accusations about me & J breaking up. None of her business. But I won't be spoken to like that, not by anyone._

_I understand._

That was enough for Beca to stick her phone in the bottom drawer. She didn't have time to get into an hour long texting conversation with a chem assignment due in two days. And it was nothing against Chloe, but she didn't want anyone running to Aubrey's defense to her. Aubrey was a big girl, she knew exactly what she was saying, and if she couldn't sack up and admit she was talking out of her ass, Beca had no interest in anything to do with her.

Which was a little disappointing, really, because she'd thought they were friends. As much as Aubrey was actually anyone's friend.

The next day at school, Aubrey was waiting by her locker as she walked in with Jesse and Benji. They shot a look at her as if to check if she wanted them to stay, but she sent them on their way.

"I hope this isn't going to be a repeat of yesterday morning," Beca said pointedly, opening her locker.

"It's not," Aubrey said. "It's an apology. Because I was wrong to say those things about you, and you and Jess breaking up was none of my business. I'm sorry."

"Well I accept your apology," Beca said. "Though I still don't understand what would possess you to say those things in the first place. I thought we were friends and you had more respect for me than that." Aubrey chose not to say anything, but Beca could see a thousand thoughts running through her mind. Eventually, Beca closed her locker again.

"I'll see you around," she said, heading off down the hall, even though they had first period together. She was angrier now than she was yesterday, which made absolutely no sense. Aubrey had apologised, which she wanted, but there was still no explanation and that was annoying. The blonde was nothing but a fat pile of contradictions and secrets.

She shook it out of her head as she got to first period, but the fact that Aubrey sat in very close to proximity to her in just about every class she took only brought it up over and over. By the end of the day she was flat out cranky and couldn't even open a book to do any study. She turned her music up and lay on her bed, trying to figure out what the fuck her problem was, but came up with nothing. She was going to have to just avoid her wherever she could until it passed.

Which, naturally, proved easier said than done. Over the next four weeks, she began distancing herself from Aubrey as much as she could. Unfortunately, it also meant distancing herself from Chloe and Stacie, which was a shame, but the three of them were almost always together. Stacie had caught on, though, and cornered her one afternoon.

"What's going on?" Stacie said. "You're avoiding us."

"I know," Beca said. "It's… not you. Or Chloe. Aubrey. But you know what? I don't care."

"I thought she apologised," Stacie said, confused.

"Yeah, she did," Beca said. "But it left me with more fucking questions than it did answers and I don't have time for that. It just makes me mad when I think about the fact that she apologised, but couldn't tell me why she'd even said those things in the first place. Where the thought even came from. Because we were friends, at least I thought we were until she came in and dressed me down for being a piece of shit."

"Oh."

"And everyone just gives her this free fucking pass," Beca said. "What the hell is with that? I get it, her dad's an asshole. So's mine, but I still fucking accept responsibility and don't expect everyone to turn a blind eye. She needs to grow the fuck up, learn to handle her fucking emotional shit, and if she can't then I don't have any fucking interest in spending time with her. Which sucks, because I actually like you guys, and I totally like her when she's not being a hot and cold lunatic." Beca realised she'd been ranting. Stacie was regarding her with a raised eyebrow, and to her immense horror, Beca spotted Aubrey less than ten feet away, having heard the whole spray.

"Shit," she muttered. Aubrey's face was scarlet, and Beca was prepared to be screamed at on an epic level. But Aubrey just hurried away to her car and peeled out of the lot as quickly as she could.

"Look maybe we are more lenient with Bree than we should be," Stacie said. "Which is probably because we've seen all of her. We know that underneath all of the other stuff there's a good person. But to me the more interesting thing about your little rant is how concerned you are with every little thing about Aubrey even though you began your speech by saying you didn't care at all. Perhaps you should think about that." Then she left Beca alone.

Beca got into her car and drove. She didn't go home, she just drove until she began to think a little clearer. She'd realised that she'd ended up in Greenhill, parked at the top of the west side of the high school campus, looking down on the science building. She used to hang out there with Luke a lot. It was one of two places she felt safe in that entire school

But she wasn't there to think about Luke, she was there to think about what Stacie had said to her. Because she'd been right. She claimed not to care in the slightest about Aubrey, but she was in fact hung up to the extreme on the blonde. On what Aubrey thought of her, on why she acted the way she did. It was stupid. It was stupid and unexplainable and-

It hit her like a ton of bricks.

"Fuck," she sighed. She liked Aubrey. _Liked_ her. Because yes, she was frustrating and fucking emotionally crippled it seemed. But she was smart and ambitious and she was pretty god damned beautiful. She groaned and rested her head against the steering wheel. This was an extremely inconvenient thing to have happen. She needed to deal with this, and by deal with this she meant get over it. Because Aubrey was for sure a straight girl. A straight girl with a family about as fucked up as her own, and she wanted to make it through senior year without being the center of a dramatic meltdown.

Her resolve lasted until the next day. Because Stacie and Chloe knew everything about everyone. And the second Stacie saw her the next day, she knew. And Chloe knew, because they would have talked about it the night before. So they both looked at her, and Beca knew that as good as her poker face could be, they saw straight through it.

They weren't assholes about it, though. Stacie kind of just squeezed her shoulder as she walked past. It didn't help. Beca knew she was going to have to talk to Aubrey sooner rather than later and try to apologise for what she'd heard the night before. But the blonde was beyond skittish around her now. She disappeared as Beca showed up at lunch. Sat well away from her in classes. And when Aubrey had spotted her walking her way after school, she turned and headed in the opposite direction.

She was still trying to figure out what to do about the whole situation that afternoon when her dad and Sheila walked into the kitchen. Her dad wasn't particularly good with picking up on her mood, but Sheila was pretty good at it.

"Something up?" she asked Beca. She made a noncommittal shrugging gesture.

"It's hard to explain," she said.

"Try us," Sheila said.

"It's about a girl," Beca began delicately. Her dad looked immediately uncomfortable, but he didn't say anything, so she continued. "I like her. But man, things are really unnecessarily adversarial. We've both said some things. And we've both got our own issues, you know? And I need to talk to her, but I might have gone off one day and said a whole bunch of stuff and now I can't even get close enough to apologise to her let alone have an actual conversation."

"There's not much you can do with this situation," Sheila said. "Just wait it out and hope you can catch her eventually. And if you work it out, great. But don't try and hurry through it, you know? If the two of you are as… explosive… as you say, it's probably best to take your time."

"That's not bad advice," Beca said. "Thanks. And uh… it was good just to get it off my chest." She headed to her room and pulled some books out. She felt better after talking with Sheila and she was going to take her advice to wait and take her time trying to talk to Aubrey. She didn't even know if Aubrey was gay, so she didn't see the point in getting bent out of shape before they were even on civil terms.


	7. Chapter 7

Beca began hanging out with Chloe and Stacie again, determined to eventually be able to speak to Aubrey at some point. She wasn't hounding the girl, just being in the same social circles and hoping that they might reach a point of civility sometime soon.

A few weeks later, Beca had her opportunity. She and Aubrey were both selected as representatives in a debate tournament with the other private schools in the greater Atlanta area. It meant that in a months time, she and Aubrey would be sharing a hotel room during the three days - since the other team member and the reserve were both male, there was no other option.

They were scheduled to meet early Tuesday mornings before class to practice and research current events as a group. Beca knew it was going to be awkward, so she approached Aubrey on Monday afternoon after their first team meeting to try and clear the air.

"Aubrey," she said. "Can we talk? Because we're about to spend some significant time together on this thing and I don't want our weirdness to affect the team."

"I'll be at Starbucks in an hour," she said. "I have to stop off somewhere first."

"Okay," Beca said. "Thanks." She made her way to her car and turned some music up for the drive. Jess was working already, so she went and ordered some coffee, spending a few moments chatting to the blonde.

She settled down at a table and pulled her laptop out, figuring she may as well kill the hour doing some homework. She was just pulling her phone out to text her dad to let her know she'd be late when she felt someone hovering near her table. She looked up. She didn't know the girl, but she was definitely waiting for something.

"Need something?" Beca asked. "Or just going to hover around for a bit longer?" The girl looked around for a second and then sat down.

"My name's Ashley," she said.

"Beca."

"This is going to sound incredibly weird, and I'm well aware it might make me seem like a stalker," the girl rambled, "but I saw you chatting with the girl at the counter, Jess?"

"Yep," Beca said. "We're friends, go to school together."

"I was wondering if you knew… see the thing is…" the girl couldn't really string a sentence together, and her cheeks had colored scarlet. But Beca realised what was happening.

"You like her," Beca said. "And you want to know if she's seeing anyone."

"Yes," Ashley said. "Adding a hopefully-she-dates-girls clause in there."

"Well, she does date girls," Beca said. "And she isn't seeing anyone at the moment."

"Great," Ashley said. "I talk to her when I come in here, which is a lot because I work across the road. And yes, I like her."

"Full disclosure," Beca said. "I know these things for a reason. We dated, briefly."

"Oh."

"Nothing went wrong, exactly," Beca said. "She's awesome, and I'm glad we're still friends. Just lacked a little chemistry, we decided. But she's rad."

"Okay," Ashley said. "Thanks. Sorry for being weird."

"Girls make us weird," Beca said, shrugging. "I'm sure it's a thing." Ashley headed away after that, so Beca turned her focus to her computer and the work in front of her. She almost didn't spot Aubrey come in, but the other girl simply lined up for coffee and then sat at the table opposite her.

"Thanks for coming," Beca said, saving her progress and closing the laptop. " I know you appreciate getting straight to the point as much as I do so I'm just gonna dive right in. I don't like that things have gotten super awkward between us, Aubrey. And I can admit that a lot of it is my fault. You apologized. And I accepted that, but if I'm gonna be honest, I was kinda also hoping for an explanation. It doesn't excuse all the shit I said to Stacie, though, so I want to say that I'm sorry, and that I do want us to be friends."

"I accept your apology," Aubrey said. "I know that you probably expected an explanation and there is one, only… Ugh."

"What's wrong?"

"Okay, you'll have to bear with me for a second because I don't normally talk about stuff like this with anyone except Chloe and Stacie," she said. "I want to tell you why I said those things, only I'm not quite ready to do that just yet. There's a lot more to it than me just flying off the handle, but that's got nothing to do with you. But I really am sorry I said them though, and I don't actually think those things about you. I just need you to give me a little more time before I can explain it fully. I know it has to be frustrating, but if you can just trust me…"

Beca regarded the other girl for a moment. She was quite a puzzle. But it was a puzzle she wanted to - not figure out. She wanted to watch it solve itself. Plus she was happy they were even able to be in close proximity to each other at this point.

"Well, okay then," Beca said. "I'm not going to push you for the explanation, Aubrey. But when you're ready, I'll be happy to listen. And we're friends again?"

"I'd really like that," Aubrey said with a small smile. "I kind of grew accustomed to studying with you. Feels a little weird on my own."

"Well if you're not busy right now, feel free to stick around," Beca said. "I'm going to duck to the restroom and grab a refill."

"I just have to grab some stuff from my car," Aubrey said. The blonde got up and disappeared and Beca watched her go. That had gone well. It actually had her feeling optimistic. She still had a lot to learn about the blonde, she knew, but at least they were friends again.

It improved both of their moods over the following weeks. They were back to how they had been before, better even. That fact didn't go unnoticed by Stacie and Chloe, who were watching Beca and Aubrey interacting and secretly discussing how long it would take for the two of them to get together.

"I have a plan," Chloe announced to Stacie one lunch period as they watched the two discuss something very intently with Jesse and Amy.

"What's that?"

"My birthday party Friday after next," she replied simply. "Force them to figure it out. If they manage not to kill each other after being in Atlanta for three days together, then it's obvious."

"It's already obvious," Stacie said pointedly.

"To everyone but them," Chloe said. "Idiots."

They kept their eye on the two of them as the days progressed. Beca and Aubrey were together just about every day now, if they weren't working on homework, they were prepping for the debate tournament.

When they left for the tournament from school on Sunday afternoon, they and their two teammates piled their bags into the back of one of the school minivans. The faculty advisor was Mr Johnson, and he was pretty good as far as teachers went. He let Beca provide the music for the trip and also had no objections to stopping for food at least once on the journey. Beca and Aubrey sat behind the two boys, with the rear of the van piled with their bags.

The trip was almost three hours, and by the time they arrived they were both aching for some coffee. They were staying in a pretty decent hotel, which was nice of the school, but Aubrey implied that Barden was all about the very best during these sorts of occasions. Mr Johnson handed them their room keys so they could put all their stuff away. The formalities weren't due to start until the next morning, but they were required to eat dinner as a group and then either put a little more work in, or retire directly to their rooms for the evening.

In the end, the team chose not to have another brainstorming session. They could read up on current news events in their respective rooms and they'd already discussed who would be speaking when. Aubrey was a natural to lead off. Han would go second because he had a knack for remembering details and Beca was selected to close because Mr Johnson had been surprised by her ability to leave a formidable impression despite her tiny size, and was hoping to make the most of it.

So the group had separated with a warning not to stay up too late and definitely no charging anything to their rooms, and Beca and Aubrey made their way to their hotel room. Beca offered the bathroom to Aubrey first, and stripped her school jacket off, leaving it hung over the back of the chair. She pulled her laptop out and began playing with some music stuff, not bothering with headphones. She didn't hear Aubrey shut the water off or the door to the ensuite open.

"That's really good," she heard. Aubrey was wearing a soft looking Henley and small shorts, her hair still wet.

"Thanks," Beca said. "It's something I've been working on for a while. Almost done, I just need to find some time and someplace quiet to get some vocals on top."

"You're really good at that stuff, aren't you?" Aubrey asked.

"Yeah, I am," Beca said. "Music is easy like that for me." She saved where she was up to and then collected her stuff to head into the bathroom. She sang a little in the shower, completely unaware that the blonde could hear her. Aubrey was sitting in her own bed with a book open, but was in reality listening to Beca sing and wondering how long she'd be able to keep this charade up.

Because now that they were friends again, she knew Jess had been right. It hadn't been misplaced concern or righteous anger that had her lashing out at Beca. She liked her. A lot. And it was not something she knew how to handle. She couldn't help it though, the brunette challenged her, was able to keep up with her insane pace, she was really gorgeous and she was just… too much. Aubrey knew that before long she'd do something stupid and there'd be no way Beca would feel the same way that she did.

"Hey," Beca said, evidently finished in the shower. "I know you don't do the party thing much, but will you be at Chloe's Friday night?"

"I will," Aubrey said. "I'd never miss Chloe's birthday, she's been my best friend since we were four. Are you staying the night?" She tried to stop her eyes tracking the other girl, who was wearing only a tiny tank top - not helpful when her breasts were rather ample - and what looked like a pair of cotton boxers.

"I hadn't planned on it," Beca said. "I know she said everyone else would be."

"Yeah, we all will be," Aubrey said. "It's one of the few nights of the year I actually get out of the house and enjoy myself." Beca found that an incredibly sad statement for a senior in high school to make.

"Maybe I will," she said. Aubrey turned back to her book. Beca put her things away and then climbed into her own bed.

"What are you reading?" Beca asked. "I think I've seen you with that book a lot."

"It's my favorite," Aubrey said. "It's a book of poetry by Jane Hirshfield."

"Poetry huh?" Beca said.

"If I had my way I'd major in English, poetry even, go to Princeton," Aubrey said. "Hirshfield was one of the first women to graduate from there. First co-ed class."

"So if you're not going to Princeton to major in English, what will you be doing?" Beca asked. She was so confused by this girl. She seemed so… resigned to her fate.

"Yale or Harvard. Poli sci into Law," she said. She recited it as if she'd said it a thousand times.

"Do you want to be a lawyer?" Beca asked. Aubrey closed the book and put it down, quietly taking a moment. Beca knew she was either about to shut down completely or she was going to take a risk and start sharing. She hoped it was the latter.

"Of course I don't," Aubrey said. "I mean, it's a respectable career choice. And I'd be good at it. But I don't want that. But it's not that simple."

"Want to tell me about it?" Beca said gently.

"It's not a very interesting story," Aubrey said. "My dad's a lawyer, his dad's a lawyer, his dad's a lawyer. It's the family business."

"Is it one of those deals where if you don't go to their school and do their study, they don't pay?" Beca asked.

"You sound like you have experience with that," Aubrey said. "That's exactly right."

"Not that I don't think you're smart enough, or that you wouldn't, but what happens if you don't get admitted?" Beca asked.

"I can't even entertain the thought without wanting to throw up everywhere," Aubrey said. "My life would not be worth living."

"I'm gonna say something that will potentially cause you to stop talking to me for the night," Beca said. "But is living a life that you don't want, chasing a career you don't want at a school you don't want to go to, is that a life worth living? Because man, I'd rather be dirt poor and clawing my way up the ladder but happy, than rich, successful and miserable."

Aubrey sank into silence but she didn't roll over or tell Beca to mind her own business. She just thought about it for a while. And she didn't say anything, but Beca saw the tears fill her eyes from her spot on the bed. So she didn't speak, she just got up from her bed and climbed onto Aubrey's. She didn't know how the blonde felt about hugging, and she normally wasn't much of a hugger herself.

But the second her arm slid around Aubrey's shoulders, the blonde buried herself against Beca's side. It wasn't a full sob, it wasn't even particularly teary. It was almost like she was afraid to let herself fully emote. But she clung to Beca for a long time, so Beca held her.

"I shouldn't have said that, made you so upset," Beca said softly. "I'm sorry." Aubrey just shook her head.

"No, everything you said is true," she said. "But I have no choice. I have no choice in any of it."

"You'll figure it out," Beca said, hand stroking her hair. "But we should try and get some rest for tomorrow. Man I could have had better timing with this thing."

"That's what it does, though," Aubrey said. "Sneaks up on me when I least expect it, when it's least convenient. It's not quite as easy being me as people would expect."

"Will it make you feel better if I share something about me?" Beca said.

"No, you don't have to do that. Could you maybe play some music?" Aubrey asked. "Just for a while?" Beca nodded and set up her iPod to play for a while, picking something calming. She turned the lights off but left a lamp on and they both got into bed. Beca worried that she'd thrown Aubrey off for tomorrow, but it didn't take long for the blonde to fall asleep. After she was sure that she was in a deep sleep, she flicked the music off and tried to get some sleep herself.

The next morning, Aubrey had shaken it out of her system, it had seemed. She had her game face on, that was for sure. They joined the others for breakfast in the hotel restaurant before making their way to the convention center where the debate tournament would take place. They had to sign in and were then herded to another table where they were given their first school assignment for the round of 32.

It ended up being a school none of them had heard of, and they easily won the round. After lunch their round two opponent was Beca's former school, and upon seeing their name below Barden on the draw, Beca wanted to beat them badly. Aubrey gave her a quick pep talk during their preparation time and Han was on board, committed to crushing them. It was barely even a contest. Greenhill were obliterated. The adjudicator commented that Barden had severely outclassed Greenhill and were setting themselves up as one of the teams to beat. The faculty advisor from Greenhill approached Beca after the debate was done.

"Well done," she said to Beca. "I wondered how you were getting along at Barden, your dad doesn't really talk about you that much."

"Not surprising to hear," Beca said. "But thank you."

"It was almost him coming here," she replied. "But I'm glad it wasn't. Barden seems to be doing you a world of good, Beca. And we'll be watching for you guys in the final rounds."

"Thanks," Beca said. Aubrey had come up beside her.

"Who was she?"

"Ms Tracy," Beca said. "She was okay. New to the school last year so wasn't really sure how far she could push all the bullying stuff without losing her job." There were a few other scheduled debates for the day, so they hung around to watch some more before they headed out for dinner.

The next day went along fairly similarly. They suffered a close scare in the round of eight, beating St Xavier's by a very narrow margin. One of the tournament aides had commented that it would be a shame that Barden and St Xavier's couldn't both make the final round because they were clearly the two best teams. Aubrey tried not to let that seep into her brain; she didn't want to get complacent. The round of four was a breeze, and they soon found their name on the draw with only one other - Atlanta Preparatory College.

Mr Johnson was impressed with his group, even Alan, who had not participated but in the spirit of teamwork had sat in on a number of other debates to try and glean any information about the other teams. He said that the Prep team was slick, and they talked rapidly but articulately. The only faltering seemed to come when other teams rebutted their statistical claims, which Han liked. He was a whiz for statistics and figures and could recall studies on just about everything under the sun.

They headed back to their rooms after a long dinner, and after changing Beca simply sprawled out on the bed and put some music on. Aubrey mimicked her actions, groaning after the big meal they'd just ingested. She was clearly thinking about things though.

"Do you think it's normal?" she asked eventually.

"What's normal?" Beca asked.

"For someone my age to worry this much about their future," Aubrey said. Beca sat upright.

"Probably not," Beca said. "But we all do it. I mean, let's be honest. I know that the chances of me actually breaking into music and having a successful career are really, really small."

"So why do it then?" Aubrey asked.

"Because if I never try, then the chance stays at zero," Beca said. "A tiny chance is better than no chance." Aubrey nodded a little.

"I'm just so worried that in twenty years I'm going to wake up and hate my life," Aubrey said. "I really don't fit any of the molds that the Posens have spent so long crafting."

"Well, I can't stop you from going off to Yale or Harvard to be a lawyer," Beca said. "I also can't make you run off to Princeton and study English, write poetry or whatever you want to do. But dammit Aubrey, you gotta know, this isn't living."

"Beca, what-"

"I'll admit I don't know you like Chloe does," Beca said, well aware that she was beginning to rant. "Or like Stacie. Or the others. But man, it kills me to see how caged you are. It's frustrating, even. Because you're amazing, right? Smart. Dedicated, you work your ass off. You've achieved so many incredible things. But just imagine what you might achieve if it was something you were chasing of your own accord and not something your parents put in your path. Now that would be something to see. I wanna see that, see you blow it out of the water because _you_ want to."

Aubrey simply sat up, tears streaming down her face. She threw herself toward Beca and hugged her hard. Beca wasn't sure what was happening but she knew that she just had to hug it out of her. So she wrapped her arms around Aubrey, letting her cry against her for the second time in the past few days.

After a while her back began to ache and she shuffled them up so they were leaning against the headboard of the bed. Aubrey still hadn't said anything, and Beca didn't want to make her cry more. She managed to untuck the blanket and pull it up around the two of them. It wasn't about her feelings for Aubrey, not this time. It was about the fact that the other girl was clearly experiencing something and she obviously didn't want to be alone.

"It's okay," Beca said. "I don't mind if you don't." Beca got up and turned the lights out before squishing back into the bed, glad for a change that she was so tiny. Aubrey latched onto her and whispered quietly.

"Thank you," she said. "I'd like to talk to you about all of this tomorrow after we're done, if that's okay."

"Of course," Beca said. She didn't know how long it took for her to fall asleep, but it wasn't long, not with the warmth of Aubrey's body lulling her away.


	8. Chapter 8

The debate final was almost anti-climatic. Atlanta Prep opened and the basis for their argument seemed to be some shaky statistical data. Han hastily scribbled some notes down for Aubrey and she came out of the gates roaring, after which Atlanta Prep never recovered. Barden Academy were crowned Greater Atlanta Debate Champions by a considerable margin.

They took a long lunch to celebrate before heading back, all the students except Aubrey dozing off on the ride back home. She stayed awake, sunglasses on, body slightly angled so she could watch Beca, who was curled up in the seat quite comfortably. She was going to have to tell this girl how she felt, tell her everything. And she wanted to do it before she lost her nerve.

They got back to Barden, and the parking lot was almost deserted. Alan and Han left relatively quickly, but Mr Johnson headed inside to take care of some things and get their shield displayed somewhere prominent.

"Can we go somewhere and talk?" Aubrey asked. Beca was surprised that she sounded so nervous asking the question.

"Yeah, for sure," she replied. "Wanna like, go somewhere not here or find an empty classroom?"

"Yeah, let's grab some coffee and find somewhere."

"Want me to drive?" Beca asked. "I can drop you at home after if you like. Your car should be fine here another day."

"Okay." They loaded up into Beca's car and instead of swinging past Starbucks they just got drive through at a Dunkin Donuts and Beca drove them to a park nearby. She turned the engine off and they sat on the hood of the car, drinking their coffee silently. Beca knew if she pushed Aubrey it would just take longer so she waited.

"I needed to demonize you, Beca," was the first thing she said. "It was easier that way. I didn't necessarily want to -" she fell silent again.

"I needed to make you into the bad guy because it was better than the alternative," she said. "Except that hasn't worked out very well for me, because you've been proving to me over and over that you really aren't the bad guy."

"So what's the alternative?" Beca asked.

"The alternative is that I accept something that I've made an effort to deny and I'm not well equipped to handle," Aubrey said. "Which is that I'm gay, and that I'm also attracted to you. And the more time we spend together, especially after how great you've been the past couple of days even though it's ended up with me crying on two separate occasions, the more I have this overwhelming need to kiss you. Which is fantastic but I'm really running out of reasons to stop myself."

Beca couldn't help but smile at Aubrey's rambling. She was flustered and nervous and it was actually kind of adorable.

"If you're looking for a reason, I'm not going to give you one," Beca said. "Haven't I just spent the past couple of days challenging you about things you want to do as opposed to things you're expected to do?"

Aubrey's fingers ran around the rim of her coffee cup and she looked deep in thought. Beca continued.

"But if you're looking for me to kiss you, Aubrey, I'm not going to do that either, even if I do want to," she said. "Because it's about time you made a conscious decision for yourself instead of letting people to make them for you."

So she did. She took Beca's face in her hands, holding her eyes for a second, before bringing their lips together. Beca was careful not to take it too far, letting Aubrey set the pace. She felt Aubrey's tongue sweep out just a tiny bit, but moreso than that, she felt the blonde trembling.

"You're shaking," Beca said, breaking off. "Are you okay?"

"Yes," Aubrey said. "This is just very new to me and I don't know what I'm doing." Beca took stock of the situation. This was going to be a big deal for Aubrey. Doubled, she suspected, by whatever family issues were going on behind that. The blonde was leaning back in, but Beca stopped her.

"Wait," Beca said. "We should stop."

"Why?" Aubrey asked, fear filling her chest.

"It's not bad," Beca said, taking her hand. "I just really want you to take some time and think about what you're doing. I'm happy to support you whatever you decide and I am hoping that you decide you want to try something here, but this has been a really emotional couple of days for you."

"Okay," Aubrey promised.

"Do whatever you need to," Beca said. "Hash it out with Chloe. Or call me if you want to talk. But yeah, maybe we can catch up at Chloe's party?"

"That's a good idea," Aubrey said. They got back into the car and didn't speak much more apart from Aubrey navigating them to her place.

"Will you be okay for a ride in the morning?" Beca asked. Aubrey nodded.

"I'll be fine," she said.

"Before you get out," Beca said. "You should know that if you decide that this is something you want to pursue, I am interested. This isn't one sided. And regardless of what you decide, I'm going to support you through it, okay?"

"I really appreciate that," she said quietly. "And that you're making me take my time."

"I'll see you tomorrow?" Beca asked.

"Yeah," she replied. "Thanks for the ride."

She waited as Aubrey tugged her bag from the back seat and made her way inside. Then she headed home, before going inside to take a hot shower and get started on the mountain of work that had accumulated while she was away.

Aubrey was at home and sitting at her own desk. She, too, had a pile of work she'd missed while they'd been in Atlanta. But she couldn't focus because her mind was racing with everything that had happened between her and Beca in the past few days.

Namely that she had kissed her. There had been so many moments where she all she could think about was kissing her. But she had tried to ignore that urge for as long as she could, and it hadn't worked. Because Beca somehow knew her, understood her, and when she'd broken down crying she'd held her and shared her bed even though she had no idea what was going on.

She picked up her cell phone and texted Chloe.

_Hey Chlo are you busy?_

Her phone rang a few minutes later, the redhead in question on the end of the line.

"Hey Bree, how did you guys go in Atlanta?" she asked.

"We won," Aubrey said. "Are you doing anything?"

"Not really," Chloe said. "Something up?"

"I need to talk," Aubrey replied. "Do you think you could come over?"

"Sure thing. Twenty minutes?"

"Thanks."

"You okay, Bree?" Chloe asked, sounding concerned.

"For the most part, yes," she said. "I'll explain when you get here." She hung up and waited, doing a little work until she head the doorbell. She let Chloe in and they headed upstairs to her room. She didn't really have to worry about privacy, her parents almost never came into her room. Chloe spread out on her bed and waited for Aubrey to talk, the blonde perching next to her.

"I'm about to drop a whole lot of information on you, Chlo," she said. "But I need you to hear me out. You're my best friend and I trust you."

"Always, Bree," Chloe said.

"Okay," Aubrey said. "So the first thing is something that I'm pretty sure you've suspected for quite a while, but I've never been ready to say it out loud. Chloe, I'm gay." Chloe immediately reached out for her hand. This was huge.

"Well, yes I did suspect, but that's your business, Bree," she said. "But thank you for telling me."

"The reason I'm telling you this is because of Beca," Aubrey said. "I've known that I was gay for quite some time, years even. But not until she arrived did I realise that I couldn't push it down any more. She made it impossible to ignore."

"She did?"

"Because I'm attracted to her," Aubrey continued, "and this afternoon I kissed her."

"You what!?" Chloe asked. That was a surprise. Sure, she and Stacie had hoped the two of them would get their shit together and talk, but kissing was a whole other thing.

"It's more complicated than it sounds," Aubrey said, "But I did kiss her."

"So un-complicate it," Chloe said. Aubrey filled her in on what they'd done over the past few days, and some of the conversations they had shared. She finished where she'd started, by telling Chloe that she'd kissed Beca on the hood of her car that afternoon.

"So what happens now?" Chloe asked.

"Well, she told me I need to take some time to think about it," Aubrey said. "That she's interested if I am, but the past couple of days have been really emotional and I should figure that all out before we do anything."

"Wow," Chloe said. "Bree, this is huge. Firstly - are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," she assured her. "A little worried about future conversations I need to have with mom and dad, but on the whole I'm fine."

"Good," Chloe said. She impulsively wrapped her best friend in a hug. She was pretty much the only person who could hug Aubrey any time without her flinching away.

"But now I've got a lot going on and I need… well, I need you," Aubrey said. "I can't really think clearly."

"Well, yeah, it's a big deal," Chloe said. "Here I am. You talk."

Chloe spent most of the evening at Aubrey's as they talked over everything that had been on the blonde's mind. Chloe had had no idea how far back Aubrey had been repressing these things. It was good to hear her talking freely and openly about them, though. A lot of the talk was centered on the reaction that her parents were likely to have once they found out. The only other real question Chloe had was whether she'd be telling anyone else.

"Not until I've spoken to Beca," Aubrey said. "I don't think - I mean, I know Beca is very much out. But I still have to contend with mom and dad, and I think she'd be okay with taking things slowly. At least I hope she would be."

"Yeah, she probably would, she isn't really an asshole like that," Chloe agreed.

"Can I ask you a question?" Aubrey asked.

"Sure."

"Did you see this?" she asked. "The me and Beca."

"Stacie and I thought you had chemistry and we hoped you guys would figure out if you were compatible," Chloe admitted. "But I had no idea you were already like, all about each other. Though Beca's been nursing some heart eyes for you for a while, she just knew she had to keep a lid on it so she didn't scare you away."

"Oh," Aubrey said. "I know we've been talking all night, Chlo. I shouldn't keep you. But thanks for coming."

"Hey, you're my best friend, Aubrey," she said seriously. "This is what I'm for. If you need me, all you have to do is call." The blonde hugged her warmly and saw her back out to her car.

The next morning, Aubrey was waiting for Beca in the parking lot. The brunette smiled as she saw her, because she didn't really look like she'd changed her mind about anything.

"Hi," Aubrey said.

"Hey," Beca replied. "How are you doing?"

"Pretty good," Aubrey said. "I just wanted to let you know that Chloe knows. As a matter of courtesy. I needed to talk to her last night so yeah, it's safe to say she knows everything."

"Well, that's perfectly fine by me," Beca said.

"And I know we said we'd talk about this on Friday," Aubrey continued, "But I do want to tell you now, Beca, that I'm still in. A lot of what's going on for me has to do with the relationship between me and my parents, not me and you."

"I'm glad to hear that," Beca said. "The first bit. Second bit blows. Anything I can help with on that front?"

"Not really," Aubrey said. They began to head toward the gates.

"Just Chloe?" Beca asked.

"Well, Chloe and Stacie are kind of a package deal," Aubrey said. "Though she didn't mention telling her. I'll ask her. But there's one more person who may know, or at least pick up on it."

"Who's that?"

"Jessica," Aubrey said. "It was after I said those things about you. She kind of realised what was happening. But I don't think she'd say anything."

"Nah, she wouldn't," Beca said. "She's really not that kind of person. Anyway, I'm comfortable with you talking to whoever you need to."

"Okay," Aubrey said. "I just wanted you to be forewarned." They walked toward their lockers in silence, but the feeling Beca got just from being this close to Aubrey, she was surprised the air between them wasn't erupting in flames.

Aubrey could feel it, too. Her skin was crawling. Because they'd walked together before, this was nothing new. But there was an undercurrent now of knowing how the other person felt, knowing that all it would take would be a single action and the other would be willingly kissing them back. But it wasn't the time or the place.

They tried their best to act normal throughout the school day, and they managed pretty well. Chloe did approach Beca and tell her that she hadn't spoken with Stacie, and that she'd keep their business to herself until Aubrey was ready. Beca appreciated that. Jessica didn't even say anything, but as Beca helped Aubrey juggle her books and her lunch, there was a knowing glance toward Aubrey and then back to Beca.

She didn't care. Jessica was talking to the girl from Starbucks a few weeks back - not quite dating yet, but they were definitely headed toward that. Ashley was pretty nice from what Beca could tell of their limited interactions, the two of them exchanging pleasantries from time to time when they saw each other.

The next day was Friday, and Beca had already told her dad that she'd be going to Chloe's and staying the night with all the other girls. He seemed glad that she was willing to socialize with others apart from study dates, so he didn't really mind. Beca had brought stuff to school with her because she didn't really feel like driving all the way to Greenhill just to drive back in a couple of hours. After school let out she just headed to Starbucks and studied for a while. Jessica dropped off a refill and took a seat opposite her.

"Hey, are you coming to Chloe's later?" Jessica asked.

"Yeah, I was just gonna hang around here for a bit, screw driving home and back," Beca said. "You?"

"Yeah," she said. "I'll be done in an hour, so I'll have enough time to head home and change. Did you want to come with me? I mean, to my house, change if you need to."

"Yeah, thanks," Beca said. "I was just gonna end up changing at Chloe's otherwise. What about Ashley, she coming?"

"Yeah, she's meeting me there," Jessica said with a blush.

"You're blushing," Beca said. "I think she's pretty cool. Don't know her too well. But things are going okay?"

"I think they are," Jessica said. "She makes me laugh. I like her a lot."

"That's great," Beca said.

"And what about you and Aubrey?" Jessica asked quietly. "I can tell something's happened there."

"It's still undefined," Beca said. "She uh, kissed me on Wednesday. But I know she's got a whole lot of other shit going on so I made her take a couple days to really think about things. We're going to catch up tonight and see what happens. But I do want it to happen."

"Aubrey struggles internally more than any single person I've known," Jessica said with a sigh. "She process absolutely everything within herself, with the exception of maybe talking to Chloe once in a while. Are you going to be able to handle that?"

"I know being with her wouldn't be without its challenges," Beca said. "But a few things happened while we were in Atlanta and I know she's really trying to deal with a lot."

"And her family?"

"Whatever she needs from me, she can have it," Beca said. "And I'd be saying that even if I wasn't interested. I know - I mean, I can't speak for her specific family situation. But I know what it's like not to have that family support. To feel alone in it. And I don't want that for anyone."

"You're a good person, Beca," Jessica said. "And I think you and Aubrey would be good for one another." She left Beca so she could finish the rest of her shift. Once she'd clocked out, she and Beca headed back to her place. Beca only really needed to change, so Jessica left her in her room while she headed to the bathroom. She changed quickly, fixed up her hair and was touching up her makeup when Jess came back in, fully dressed. They both finished up and headed out, Beca making a little polite small talk with Jessica's mom on the way. She had met the woman a few times, and she was nice.

By the time they actually made it to Chloe's place, most of the girls had already arrived, as well as the rest of their year it seemed. The music was loud and the chatter of their classmates only amplified it. Beca's eyes immediately began scanning for Aubrey as Jessica dug her phone out to see if she could locate Ashley. She spotted the blonde outside milling around near the pool with some of the others and smiled, beginning to push her way through the crowd. Aubrey saw her approaching and broke out in a wide smile, meeting her near the back door.

"Hey," she said. "You look really great."

"Thanks," Beca said. "Jess loaned me some changing space and a mirror. You look gorgeous as always." That made Aubrey blush.

"Thank you," she said.

"Seen Chloe?" Beca asked. "I got a flash drive full of music for her."

"She's out here," Aubrey said, leading her into the yard. The girl in question was holding court by the side of the pool. Once she saw that Beca had arrived, she threw her arms around the smaller girl, squealing when she produced the promised flash drive of music.

"You're the best, Beca," she said. "I'm going to get them playing right now." Having successfully delivered her music, she turned to Aubrey.

"Wanna grab a drink?" she asked. Aubrey said something that she couldn't hear in response. "Sorry, didn't catch that."

"I said it's noisy as hell and I can barely hear," Aubrey said, craning up to speak into her ear. Beca grinned and took her by the hand. They detoured inside, stopping to grab a couple of Cokes. It was quieter inside the kitchen.

"Wanna find somewhere quiet so we can talk?" she said.

"Is that, like… talking? Or something else?" Aubrey asked.

"Actual talking," Beca said with a laugh. "If you want."

"I know the perfect place," Aubrey said. She aimed for the stairs, the two of them stopping to chat for a second with Jessica and Ashley before they went up. There was a sitting room upstairs, and a small study off of that. It was quiet and they would likely be undisturbed there for as long as they wanted to be.

"Should I just dive right in?" Aubrey asked. There was only a single chair, so Beca took off her jacket for Aubrey to cover herself up with since she was in a dress and they made themselves comfortable on the floor, leaning against the wall.

"If that's what's going to help you most," Beca said. She could still feel the bass of the music through the wall. Aubrey paused.

"I can't help but feel like this an inappropriate place for us to be having this conversation," Aubrey said. "Feels like I'm hiding from someone."

"So let's blow the party for a while," Beca said. "I haven't eaten, I could go a burger if you want. Nothing dodgy, I promise."

"Yeah, that might be nice," Aubrey said. "I'll tell Chloe though, so she doesn't wonder what's happened to us." They got back up and headed downstairs. Aubrey quickly located Chloe and Beca went out to her car.

"All good?" she asked the blonde.

"Yeah," Aubrey said. "Let's go." She started the car and shifted it into gear. She was surprised to feel a hand on her knee, Aubrey's palm gently resting on her kneecap. She smiled and placed her hand on top as she headed away, fingers interlocking.


	9. Chapter 9

They ended up getting burgers and sitting in the parking lot near the park. Beca had left the car running so they could listen to music while they ate. Once they’d eaten, Aubrey sat silently in the car for a moment. Beca could see she had her pensive face on, so just waited it out. 

“So I already told you that I’m still in for this,” Aubrey said. “I’m still interested in dating. But I guess I need for you to know complicated it might potentially be getting involved with me. It wouldn’t be fair to you if I just said yes and you get blindsided by it later.”

“Okay,” Beca said. She swiveled a little in the drivers seat, racking the chair back further. “Talk to me.”

Aubrey started by telling her a little about her family. Extremely strict parents. Rigid, controlling, demanding. A pair of brothers that preceded her who easily lived up to the expectations placed on them - both Harvard educated lawyers working in prestigious firms. She didn’t have any trouble understanding what was expected of her. 1550 or above on the SAT. Harvard undergrad, Harvard law. A long and distinguished law career. 

Beca listened as she explained it all, not asking questions, but making sure Aubrey understood that she was listening. Any idiot would know that it was hard living with that kind of pressure. She stopped and started a lot while she spoke, clearly trying to stop herself from getting too emotional. That was the thing that niggled at Beca.

“Here’s the kicker,” Aubrey said, “My parents expect me to be perfect, and so far as they know, I am. But they don’t know that my Tuesday four pm tutoring appointment with Sam Geiss is actually a four pm therapy session with Dr Carol Geiss.”

“You’re in therapy?” Beca asked. This was big news.

“Only three people in the world knew until now,” Aubrey said. “Me, Dr Geiss, and Chloe. Sam doesn’t even exist.”

“Stacie?” 

“She has no idea,” Aubrey said. “I know, there are a lot of people who would be more than happy to support me, help me even. And it’s not even that I’m ashamed of it. But I absolutely cannot run the risk of my parents finding out. It would be a critical family failure on my part, and in turn their part.”

“Bree, that’s… so unfair to you,” Beca said. “Anxiety?”

“Anxiety,” Aubrey confirmed. “Fairly severe. But I’ve gotten incredibly good at masking it. At repressing any and all emotion. My walls are always up, and people think it’s because I’m being stand offish.”

“I didn’t think that,” Beca said.

“No, you didn’t,” Aubrey said with a smile. “You just slid right in. And when I moved them to keep you out, you set up camp and waited for me. And that’s how I knew, Beca.” 

Beca reached over and took her hand. Aubrey looked down at it and smiled. Aubrey’s thumb brushed the back of her hand.

“You’re not the first girl I’ve ever been attracted to,” Aubrey said. “But until you it was easy to talk myself out of it. Call it lust or whatever, rationalize it away. But you, you were someone I talked to. Someone who challenged me. And even though you didn’t really know exactly what was going on, I always felt like you understood me.” 

“So what do you want to do from here?” Beca asked. 

“I do want us to date Beca, but I don’t want to force you back into the closet to protect me from my family,” Aubrey said. 

“So we won’t go out much in Barden,” Beca said. “We already hang out to study. And if we date, we can go out closer to Greenhill. I don’t want to do anything that puts you in a position where you’re afraid. But I do want to be with you, and I think we can find enough places where we can be safe, together.”

Aubrey closed her eyes. The tears were few, but they were there, and Beca grabbed an unused napkin to wipe them away.

“Even after everything you just learned about me,” Aubrey said, “You still want to be with me?”

“I do,” Beca said simply. “I think we’d be great together. I think you’re incredible. And I think that even though I said this was supposed to be about talking, I’d like to kiss you, if that’s okay.” Aubrey’s eyes opened and she nodded, leaning across toward Beca, who met her halfway.

It was soft and slow, Beca not wanting to rush Aubrey into anything. The blonde’s hand reached around the back of her neck as her tongue slid out, and Beca shifted in her seat. Aubrey had a faint smile on her lips when they pulled back.

“So let’s play this by ear,” Beca said. “We’ll tell whoever you want. Or nobody.”

“I’d like the girls to know,” Aubrey said. “Honestly I think they’d be happy I was taking a chance.”

“So we’ll start there,” Beca said. “I’m sure we’d be okay around them. But let me reassure you, I’m not going to do anything crazy like make out with you at school. I want it to be clear, Aubrey, that you’re leading this. I know we’re in it together, but I don’t want to hurry you or make you anxious.”

“Can I confess something to you?” Aubrey said.

“Anything,” Beca said. 

“You are the first person I’ve ever kissed,” she said. Her cheeks turned bright pink. 

“Well, you’re pretty great at it for a new kid,” Beca said. She nudged the still silent Aubrey. “I get it. Your folks have kind of stressed you into not wanting to go there with anyone. Don’t be embarrassed, Bree.” The blonde just nodded and then leaned over and kissed her again.

“Let’s head back,” Aubrey said. “We’ve been gone for ages.” Beca kicked the ignition over and they headed back to Chloe’s place. They party was just starting to die out, so Beca watched Aubrey carefully, waiting for her to take the lead. She dropped Beca’s hand and shot her an apologetic look as they passed a pair of boys on the way in.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

“It’s okay,” Beca said honestly.

“One of those boys, his dad is a deacon at church with my dad,” Aubrey supplied. “I’m not ashamed of you or of this-” Beca could see she was starting to panic, so she tugged her into the first empty room she could find.

“Hey,” Beca said, kicking the door shut and taking both her hands. “We’re okay. I know how you really feel, I know that we’re going to be taking things really slow and we’re going to be low profile. You don’t have to worry about me, okay?” Aubrey was nodding, but she still looked anxious and jumpy.

“Okay,” she said.

“Trust me,” Beca said. “I wouldn’t lie to you. I just want you to be comfortable and that’s it.” There was a knock on the door and they both looked at it like they’d been busted. Instead, Chloe let herself into the room and they let out a sigh of relief almost in tandem.

“Hey,” she said quietly. “Saw you two sneak in here. Everything okay?”

“Yeah,” Aubrey said. “Just had a bit of a freak out.”

“But you guys have talked?” Chloe asked, looking from one girl to the other.

“Yep,” Beca said. “Bree’s told me everything.”

“Everything?” Chloe asked, looking at Aubrey. 

“Yeah, Chlo. Everything,” she said pointedly. The redhead understood what she meant.

“Good,” she said, cracking a smile. “But I’m assuming the two of you don’t want to be outed just yet, so it’s best if the three of us leave this room together, don’t you think? The girls are hanging out around the pool, people are starting to leave though.” They left the room and headed out the back. Beca picked them up a couple of drinks and they joined some of the others by the pool. 

In just over an hour, everyone had left except for the girls who would be staying the night. Beca grew cold and went inside to grab the hoodie she’d left in her bag. As she reclaimed her seat next to Aubrey, the blonde reached over and took her hand, holding it in her lap. She squeezed her fingers. 

“Hold up,” Stacie said, interrupting whatever story it was that Amy had been telling. Her eyes were focused on the two girls sitting hand in hand and huddled together on a bench seat. “What’s going on here?”

“Something,” Beca supplied. “Very new.” Everyone was looking at Aubrey, so Beca just stopped talking.

“Beca and I are dating,” she said quietly to the group, “but as you guys are well aware that’s not going to be easy with my family… We’d appreciate it if it just stayed amongst the people here for now.”

“Of course,” Stacie said. “We got your back.” Everyone seemed to be nodding in agreement.

“Thank you,” Aubrey said. “And it is very new, and we’re going to be taking things really slowly. But I am - we are - happy.” 

“Awww,” Amy said bounding over to give them both a hug. “Beautiful.” Beca rolled her eyes at Amy. She liked that girl, she was hilarious. But it put an end to the focus on being on them, the Australian resumed her storytelling with gusto.

After a while they went inside, the air getting just a little too chilly to hang around out there much longer. They took turns going to get into pajamas, Cynthia Rose and Stacie pulling extra pillows, blankets and sleeping bags from a cupboard. Beca went upstairs to change, pulling on some sweatpants and an old Greenhill gym tee. When she opened the door, Chloe was waiting on the other side.

“We need to talk,” she said. Beca followed her and they went and sat on the edge of the bed in the master bedroom.

“Hit me,” Beca said.

“You don’t seem surprised by my ambush,” Chloe said.

“It makes sense,” Beca said. “Aubrey told me everything, and she meant everything. That means you and I know the same things. But you don’t know me, so you just want to make sure I’m not going to do anything to hurt her.”

“That’s pretty accurate,” Chloe said. “She’s very important to me. I feel protective of her, almost. There aren’t many people looking out for her best interest, and now you and I are on the same team.”

“I promise you, Chloe, I only want her happy,” Beca said.

“Inside six months you’ve dated Jess and now Bree,” she said delicately. “If I was to call one of your friends at Greenhill, would they tell me that I should be worried?”

“No,” Beca said. “I had one girlfriend at Greenhill. And one not really a girlfriend that didn’t last very long before that. And I’m on good terms with both of them.”

“And what about her folks?” Chloe said.

“Yeah,” Beca said. She shifted a little. “I would never do anything to put Bree in danger. And it kills me to see how anxious she gets just thinking about her family. I’m not going to rush her out of the closet, I’m not going to do anything stupid. We want to just have you guys know, and when we do actually start going on dates, it’s going to be in places I know are safe, in Greenhill.”

“Then I only have one part of this talk left,” Chloe said. “If you hurt Bree, even unintentionally, I’ll make your life miserable and that’s a guarantee.”

“And I completely understand that.” Chloe surprised her by laughing.

“You aren’t remotely afraid of me at all,” she said. 

“We can tell everyone that you were sufficiently scary and threatening,” Beca said. 

“Deal,” Chloe said. “Let’s go.” They headed back downstairs, Aubrey shooting Beca a somewhat worried look.

“It’s fine,” Beca said. “Just doing her best friend duty.” She claimed the space next to Aubrey in a corner of the room that had a couple of pillows and blankets heaped on a puffy sleeping bag. 

“You okay?” she added. Aubrey had gone quiet.

“Just happy,” she said. “And it’s nice to be able to sit here with you, with our friends, that’s all.”

“Yeah, that’s pretty great,” Beca agreed. Everyone had claimed some space and were settling in, but not exactly sleeping. They sorted through what they had. 

“What if we unzip that sleeping bag and use it almost like a mattress?” Aubrey said. “We still have a blanket and pillow each.”

“Sounds fine to me,” Beca said. They quickly assembled their makeshift bed and settled in, facing the rest of the group so they could keep up the chatter. Aubrey wasn’t the first asleep, but she was getting drowsy.

“Hey,” Beca said softly. “You tired?”

“I’m normally in bed hours before now,” Aubrey said. She shifted on the sleeping bag. 

“Yeah, me too, most nights,” Beca said. “Occasionally I might stay up late and work on a mix, but I’m the kind of girl who loves her sleep.” Aubrey scooted a little closer.

“Is this okay?” Aubrey asked. “You’re really warm.”

“I always am a little warm,” Beca said. “But I don’t mind.” Aubrey’s eyes fluttered closed and Beca smiled. She could almost pinpoint the exact moment the blonde fell asleep. Everything in her face relaxed, she looked so calm and peaceful. Beautiful. Some of the others were still talking, quietly, but Beca was quite happy to let herself drift off to sleep as well. 

When she woke the next morning it was with her arm draped lightly over Aubrey’s waist, and the blonde’s hand tightly entwined in hers. They were kind of hidden from view of everyone else, the rest of the guests also in the early stages of waking up. Aubrey shifted, stretching a little and then rolled over to face Beca.

“Hey,” she said. 

“Hi,” Beca said. She let her arm fall off Aubrey’s waist. “We got a little cuddly last night, I hope you don’t mind.”

“Not at all,” Aubrey said. “Thanks for keeping me warm.”

“Do you have plans for today?” Beca asked.

“Not really,” Aubrey said. “I’ll be expected home around lunch time. We’ll make breakfast soon, it’s normally a pancakes for days kind of situation.”

“Where are Chloe’s parents?” Beca asked. “Out of town?”

“Staying at her aunts,” Aubrey said. “She only lives a couple of streets away. Chloe’s never let things get out of hand and they’re close enough that if anything happens they can deal with it ASAP.”

“That’s pretty cool,” Beca said. 

“Chloe’s parents are the best,” Aubrey said. “They’re like my surrogate parents in a way. I talk to them from time to time. They’re nice. Friendly. What I feel like parents should actually be, you know?” Beca nodded and pushed some hair out of Aubrey’s face. 

“Do you need a ride home?” she asked.

“That’d be nice,” Aubrey replied. “My parents might be home though.”

“That’s okay,” Beca said. “I’ll keep it cool. Just a friend dropping you off after a night out.”

“You’re so sweet to me, Beca,” Aubrey sighed. “Are you sure-”

“Yes,” Beca insisted. People were sitting up and talking now. She gestured for Aubrey to come with her. They got up and Beca led her outside. The weather had turned a little downcast overnight, but it wasn’t particularly cold. 

“Bree, you have to trust me,” Beca said. “I want to be with you. And I’m willing to be patient, wait as long as you need me to. And you can ask me a thousand times, but I’m going to keep saying the same thing. I just want to be with you. Whatever it takes. You need to be safe, and secure, and I want to help you feel those things.” Aubrey wrapped her arms around Beca and held her tight. Beca just kept her close for as long as she needed. 

“It just seems really unbelievable that someone would go to all this trouble for me,” she said softly. “I mean, you’re out and okay with all of it, and now you’re basically going back into the closet for me. It doesn’t seem fair.”

“A lot of things aren’t fair,” Beca said. “But dating you is something that’s going to make me incredibly happy, which isn’t something I’ve had a lot of in my life. So let’s not think about fair and unfair, let’s just think about both of us being happy.” Aubrey kissed her gently. They went back inside, and Jessica was hovering inside the door, evidently waiting for Aubrey.

“Hey Aubrey, got a second?” she asked. Aubrey nodded and Beca headed toward the kitchen. Everyone else was in the kitchen so they didn’t feel the need to disappear back outside.

“What’s up?” Aubrey asked.

“I just wanted to talk to you about Beca,” Jessica said. “I wanted to reassure you that she’s going to be really good to you. I mean, she was to me. She’s a good girlfriend, and you won’t need to worry about anything with her. She’s sweet, she’s not going to pressure you or hurry you.”

“Um, thanks,” Aubrey said. “I just keep worrying about why she’d want to go through this painful stuff with my family just to be with me.”

“Because she likes you, you idiot,” Jessica said with a grin. “Have you not noticed the way she lights up when you come into the room?”

“I don’t feel like I’m worth it,” Aubrey said. “Worth the trouble.”

“Well, the whole time I’ve known Beca, even when we were dating, she never once said anything I suspected to be a lie,” Jessica said. “If she says she’s sticking around, I’d trust her. Think about it. She’s never shied away from saying exactly what she thinks, even if it was an unpopular opinion. So why would she start lying to you? She wants to be with you, and I think you two will be great for each other.”

“Thanks, Jess,” Aubrey said. “I don’t want it to feel like I’m doubting Beca, but it-”

“It’s got more to do with your parents than Beca, I know,” Jessica said. “Just remember all of us love you and we want you to be happy.” She gave Aubrey a quick hug and they went into the kitchen. Aubrey immediately sought out Beca, who grinned at her and beckoned her over. 

“I made you coffee,” she said. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, great,” Aubrey said. “I know I keep freaking out over and over. But I’m happy, Beca.”

“Good,” she said. She slid the mug toward her. Stacie and Cynthia Rose were manning the griddle, turning out pancakes at an impressive speed. Clearly this was a routine they were used to. The girls all grabbed what they wanted and settled around the long table, eating and laughing. Beca looked around. She didn’t really have many female friends at Greenhill, but she did here. It was a nice change. 

After they’d had breakfast and taken turns washing up and changing, they helped Chloe pack up all the sleeping stuff and making sure the house was in a presentable condition. But it got to eleven and Aubrey kept checking the time.

“It’s okay,” Chloe said to her. “I know you’ve gotta be home by lunch. I’ll run you home in a tick, I promise.”

“Beca can take me,” Aubrey said. 

“Sure?” Chloe asked the brunette.

“Yeah,” Beca said. “Not a problem. I’ll drop her off and be right back to help.”

“We’re almost done,” Chloe said with a shake of her head, “And you still have to drive all the way back to Greenhill. But thanks for helping, Beca, and coming to the party.”

“Thanks for the invite,” Beca said. “I’ll see you Monday, then.” She gathered her and Aubrey’s bags and saw that Chloe and Aubrey were talking in the entry to the study, so she just bypassed them and said goodbye to the girls as she headed to the car. She dumped their bags in the backseat and then rifled through her glove compartment for her sunglasses. It still wasn’t particularly sunny but there was glare bouncing off of everything. 

“Sorry,” Aubrey said, sliding into the passenger seat. “Chlo was just checking up on me.”

“I like Chloe,” Beca said. “All of the girls, actually. I was thinking earlier that I didn’t really have many friends at Greenhill who were girls. It’s nice. What do you have planned for the weekend?”

“This afternoon, not much, but there’s a function on tonight my dad’s firm is sponsoring so I have to go and shake hands with about sixty old white guys,” Aubrey said. “Then Sunday I’ll have to do all the homework I won’t get done today.”

“Text me, I’ll come down and we can study at Starbucks,” Beca said. 

“Great,” Aubrey said. “I will.” She navigated Beca toward her house, and the brunette pulled into the long driveway. She wasn’t surprised by the house, it was about what she’d expected. Sprawling and meticulously maintained. 

“My mom’s coming this way,” Aubrey muttered. 

“No prob,” Beca said. “I’ll meet her. Probably about time one of them met the girl you do so much study with.” She instinctively tugged the arms of her hoodie down to cover the tattoo on her wrist.

“Hi mom,” Aubrey said, getting out of the car. “This is Beca Mitchell. We study together a bit.” Beca had tugged Aubrey’s bag from the back and handed it to her.

“You’re the transfer student,” her mother said, holding out her hand.

“Yes ma’am,” Beca said politely, shaking it. “Barden offered much better timetabling options for the amount of AP classes I wanted to take. I was pleasantly surprised to find another person doing so many of the same classes.”

“Yes, Aubrey has told us a little about you,” she said. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“You too,” Beca said. “I was just dropping Aubrey off on my way home.”

“Yes, thank you for the ride, Beca,” Aubrey said.

“No worries,” Beca said. “Again, nice to meet you, Mrs Posen.” She headed back to her car and left Aubrey with her mother. She stopped at Starbucks and picked up a coffee, only to see that she had a text from Aubrey.

[Mom thinks you’re polite and lovely. Also - thanks for pulling your sleeve down.]

Beca smiled. Aubrey worried so much. She was hoping that she could help relax her.

[That’s because I am polite and lovely. ;) I’ll see you tomorrow.]

Then she got in her car and headed back toward Greenhill. Her plan would be to crash out for another hour or two - she hadn’t slept badly but she preferred her sleep to be in a bed. She sipped her coffee as she drove, remembering with a smile how nice it had been to wake up next to Aubrey.


	10. Chapter 10

Aubrey texted her just after ten the next morning, saying that she was heading to Starbucks if she wanted to join her for a few hours. Beca smiled like an absolute idiot when she got the text, replying that she’d head straight there.

 

The blonde had already spread out over one of the larger tables. Everything was stacked neatly and there was already a cup of coffee and a bottle of water in front of her. Beca dropped her bag on one of the chairs.

 

“Hey,” she said to Aubrey. “Need a refill?”

 

“No thanks,” Aubrey said. “I haven’t been here that long.” Beca headed up to the register where Jess was taking orders. They chatted a little before Beca took her coffee down to the table. They were starting with an English paper, not even something either of them needed help on. They worked quietly, just happy to be hanging out together.

 

Aubrey got them both refills shortly after twelve. They took a little break, Jess coming over to tell them she got off at one if they wanted to grab some lunch with her and Ashley, who would be stopping past soon. They decided that sounded like a great idea, and returned to their work.

 

Ashley came in not long after and sat with them, not interrupting their workflow, just waiting with them until Jess finished work. Beca and Aubrey packed their stuff up and left it in Beca’s car as the four of them headed to the pizza place.

 

It was nice. Jess and Ashley were in the new stages of their relationship too, so the four of them looked like any other group of teenagers out for some lunch. Beca and Aubrey were quite enjoying getting to know Ashley - the girl was funny and it was clear that she liked Jess a lot. After they’d finished demolishing the pizza, Aubrey’s hand came to rest on Beca’s knee under the table. Beca held it, fingers curling tightly against her hand. Nobody in the room would have seen the small movement, but it meant the world to Beca.

 

Once they’d finished lunch they headed back to Starbucks. Ashley had offered to drive Jessica home, so they went off to her car, Aubrey and Beca both seeing as the darker haired girl planted a soft kiss on their classmate.

 

“Ashley seems really nice,” Aubrey commented. They stopped at Aubrey’s car, since they’d both brought their own, and sat on the hood for a moment.

 

“Yeah,” Beca said. “Jess deserves someone nice. So… can I take you out some day this week?”

 

“I’d really like that,” Aubrey asked. “I mean, I have to tell my parents it’s a study thing, obviously. But yes, I would love to go on a date with you.”

 

“I was thinking Wednesday,” Beca said. “Nothing fancy. I just want to spend time with you.”

 

“This sucks,” Aubrey said. “Because I’d like to kiss you right now, but half the people who own these shops know my parents.”

 

“It’s okay,” Beca said. “I understand, Bree. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

 

“Call me when you get home? I know it’s not far and you drive it all the time-”

 

“I’ll call,” Beca said with a grin. She headed home with a bright smile on her face. When she got there, her father and Sheila were home and making coffee in the kitchen. Sheila offered her a cup so she sat down, remembering to pull her phone out.

 

_Just got home having coffee with dad and Sheila. Will call after._

“How has your weekend been?” Sheila asked. Beca only just realised she hadn’t seen much of them the past couple days.

 

“Really great,” she said. “Chloe’s party was a blast. But uh, Sheila, remember how I told you about that girl I was really into?”

 

“Yeah, the complicated girl,” Sheila said.

 

“Well, we talked. A lot,” Beca said. “While we were away for debate. And after that. She’s having some problems personally that are messing her around a little, but we’re completely cool now. She’s actually my girlfriend.”

 

“How complicated?” her father asked, worried.

 

“Well, she’s pretty sure her folks are going to lose it when they find out that she’s gay,” Beca said. “She’s under extreme family pressure. Ivy League, law school. She wants to study English but there’s no way. But man, she’s so smart. And she’s beautiful. And I know it sounds like it could be really hard, but I want to be with her.”

 

“And it’ll be worth the potential trouble?” her dad said.

 

“Definitely,” Beca said. “I think she’s incredible and she really just needs someone to be patient and help her see that she’s enough on her own, you know? No conditions, no caveats.”

 

“You should ask her to dinner or something sometime,” Sheila said. “We’d make the effort to be here.”

 

“Maybe in a couple weeks?” Beca said. “It’s only been a few days, and she’s just really jumpy at the moment.” She excused herself and went up to her room. She definitely had a lot of work to get into now, but first she wanted to look at first date options. She didn’t want to go fully overboard and scare the girl, but she wanted to treat her to something nice. But first, she owed Aubrey a call. She dug her cell out of her pocket and dialed her number.

 

“Hey,” Aubrey’s voice came.

 

“Hi,” Beca said. “I’m safe at home. I told my dad and Sheila about you, they want you to come for dinner but I asked them to hold off a couple weeks.”

 

“Thanks,” Aubrey said. “It might take me a minute to really settle into this. Which sounds awful-”

 

“No, it sounds completely rational,” Beca said. “But I’m going to add that I’ve enjoyed spending time with you this weekend.”

 

“Me too,” Aubrey said. “I know I seem a bit nervous, but trust me, the happiness far outweighs that.”

 

“I’m glad to hear it,” Beca said. “Studying?”

 

“All night, probably,” Aubrey said. “You?”

 

“Same,” Beca said. “But I’ll see you tomorrow?”

 

“Definitely,” Aubrey said. “About tomorrow, though.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“I don’t want to hide this away,” Aubrey said. “But my dad is quite friendly with Bumper Allen’s dad. And given how he feels about you, he’d probably be the literal worst person to find out about us now.”

 

“So we avoid Bumper,” Beca said. “I told you, Aubrey. I’m happy to keep it as chill as you like while we’re around the others.”

 

“Chloe said that if we need cover to go out on a date, she and Stacie will help,” Aubrey said. “I think she’s almost as happy as I am that you and I got together.”

 

“Speaking of which, I have a date to plan, so I’ll let you go,” Beca said. “But I’ll see you in the morning. I might even bring coffee since I have to drive right by Starbucks.”

 

“Sounds perfect,” Aubrey said. “I’ll wait in the parking lot for you.” They hung up and Beca could feel the goofy grin on her face. She opened her laptop and began looking up ideas for a date that would be awesome but not take them too far away or be too ridiculously romantic.

 

It didn’t take her long to narrow it down, she just started thinking about all the stuff she knew Aubrey liked and after a little looking around she managed to get incredibly lucky. She knew Aubrey was going to love this date, so she made the necessary calls and settled it all before she started her homework. The next couple of days weren’t going to go fast enough.

 

Aubrey was waiting for her in the parking lot the next day as promised, and Beca also had the coffee she had promised. Aubrey’s eyes quickly scanned the parking lot, but seeing nobody of concern, she pressed a kiss to Beca’s cheek.

 

“Thanks,” she said, taking the coffee. Beca shouldered her messenger bag and they headed into school together. It was actually pretty easy to be with Aubrey at school and not have it raise red flags. She generally sat next to her in almost half her classes anyway, and in others where she didn’t, Aubrey was normally sitting next to one of their friends who happily moved to let them sit together.

 

They also sat next to each other during lunch, being screened from much of the cafeteria by their friends. They took full advantage of it, Aubrey taking Beca’s hand and tangling their fingers together. It was nice. Their friends were being very supportive, not bringing it up and talking about it relentlessly, but quietly giving them space and also helping by masking their general couple-ness from the rest of the student body. It was a huge relief for Aubrey, she’d worried a lot about how they’d manage school. But if today was an indicator, they’d be fine.

 

They headed to Starbucks after classes let out, to get some study done. But they were able to be a little more free with the affection - the only people inside the store who knew they were a couple were Jessica and Ashley, who had stopped by to visit Jess after her own classes had let out. Ashley even joined them for a few minutes. It sounded like she and Jess were really happy, and Beca was glad.

 

The next day went much the same, except after school Aubrey headed off for her therapy session, Beca kissing her quickly and reminding her they had a date planned for six pm the next night. Aubrey nodded and said she’d probably call later to talk, if Beca didn’t mind.

 

So Beca headed home and dug into her mountain of schoolwork. As she was typing an essay, she saw a notification from Messenger pop up from Chloe. The redhead and Stacie were together, and they were wondering what she had planned for a first date. At first Beca wasn’t too keen on divulging the specifics, she wanted it to be a surprise. But Chloe and Stacie were just as invested in Aubrey having a blast as she was, so she called and told them on speaker.

 

Chloe was dumbfounded at what Beca had managed to pull together and she wagered that Aubrey might actually cry when she found out what was happening. Beca made a mental note of that so she could bring Kleenex. Beca also asked for advice in dealing with the Posen parents, if she ran into them. Chloe just advised her to be polite, respectful, and if they saw her parents to stress that they were having a nice, fun, educational evening.

 

“Oh and if you’re invited in to wait,” Stacie supplied, “Make sure you compliment the hall table.”

 

“What?” Beca asked.

 

“It’s a Chippendale and Mrs P’s pride and joy,” Stacie said. “Trust me.”

 

“Okay, whatever,” Beca said.

 

“You nervous?” Chloe asked.

 

“Not really,” Beca said. “Definitely looking forward to it though.”

 

“Well, we’ll look forward to hearing all about it from Aubrey after she gets home,” Chloe joked. They broke up the call and Beca returned her attention to her homework.

 

The following day dragged on and on for both girls, but Beca was soon picking Aubrey up from her house to go on their date. Beca was wearing a fitted button down in navy blue and she made sure her sleeves were pulled down far enough to cover the tattoos on her forearm and wrist.

 

She knocked on the door and waited to see if she would be greeted by Aubrey or one of her parents. It was Aubrey, looking breathtakingly gorgeous in a tailored sheath dress and long boots.

 

“Wow,” Beca said. Then she lowered her voice. “You look amazing, Aubrey.”

 

“My parents aren’t home,” Aubrey supplied, so Beca leaned in and kissed her.

 

“Good, because I didn’t really want to hold that in,” Beca said.

 

“They’re at dinner with some investor dad represents,” Aubrey said. “They think we’re off to an application seminar for AP weighted students.”

 

“Great,” Beca said. She took Aubrey’s hand and led her toward the car, opening the passenger door for her. She got into the drivers seat. “Dinner first, and then something I’m pretty sure you’re going to love. Are you okay with surprises?”

 

“Normally I’d say no,” Aubrey said. “But I trust you.” Beca just grinned and navigated out of the Posen estate.

 

“Do you get to Exley very often?” Beca asked as she drove, turning the music down.

 

“No,” Aubrey said. “It’s up near Greenhill, isn’t it?”

 

“Closer than Greenhill but more east,” Beca said. “There’s a bit to do there. So dinner is there because there’s this really great Spanish place.” Aubrey smiled and they lapsed into chatter as they drove. Aubrey let her hand rest on Beca’s knee, and the smaller girl occasionally grasped it with her own until she needed it to drive.

 

Luckily, the food was as good as Beca remembered. She’d only been to the place a few times, but she had recalled it was always delicious and whilst it was a nice little restaurant, it wouldn’t be too romantic. Beca checked her watch a bit before eight and said they had to go. She paid for the meal and held the door open for Aubrey.

 

“Where are we going?” Aubrey asked.

 

“There’s a community college about four blocks from here,” Beca said. “I know, sounds crazy, but trust me.”

 

“I do,” Aubrey said. The slight thrill in her chest was an incredible feeling. Beca drove to the college and then she opened Aubrey’s door, earning herself a soft kiss. Beca smiled and then opened the rear door.

 

“Now, I had Chloe do something for me earlier and I don’t want you to hold it against either of us,” Beca said. She reached in and pulled out a paperback book. Aubrey recognized it straight away.

 

“That’s… my book?”

 

“Correction,” Beca said. “It’s your favorite book. I had her swipe it out of your locker and hoped you wouldn’t notice.”

 

“What’s the book got to do with anything?” Beca took her hand and they walked toward the entrance. A big board proclaimed words that caused Aubrey’s jaw to drop and she stopped walking.

 

“Poetry by Jane Hirshfield?” Aubrey said. “Are you seriously telling me that she’s here?”

 

“I got lucky,” Beca said. “I just started googling poetry events in the area and by some small miracle… I mean, if we’d scheduled our date for tomorrow we’d have to be driving to Atlanta for this and not Exley.”

 

“Oh my god,” Aubrey said. She did begin to tear up, and Beca tugged a Kleenex from her pocket and handed it to her before she pulled her in for a hug.

 

“You’re okay,” Beca said.

 

“This is the most amazing thing anyone’s ever done for me,” Aubrey said. “Beca, I can’t thank you enough.”

 

“Well, let’s go inside,” Beca said. “It’s supposed to run late, though, so we’ll only have time for the first session and then hopefully a little intermission.” They headed inside and Beca gave her name to the student working the entry - the night was free but still by RSVP, so she had been smart to call ahead.

 

Aubrey was in absolute rapture. She couldn’t tear her eyes off the front of the room where her literal idol was sitting and talking about poetry. One hand held the book tightly, and the other was firmly grasping Beca’s. Beca was listening to the presentation too, she really was, but she was also getting heavily distracted by how radiantly happy Aubrey looked right now. The light shone out of her, she looked completely alive.

 

When the intermission began, a throng of people surrounded Jane Hirshfield. Beca knew how these things worked thanks to her buddy Luke. He knew how to get access to someone when there was a crowd surrounding them and Beca had seen it done enough times. Aubrey went to go join the milling crowd as Beca excused herself for a second and went to find one of Jane’s people.

 

She quickly explained the situation to the handler, not choosing to play the date angle but more the two extremely committed high school students who’d driven a considerable distance to see her, Aubrey was a huge fan and because of Jane wanted to study poetry at Princeton. The minder told her to give her about ten minutes and wait by the back of the room, away from the crowd. Beca thanked her profusely and then waited about five minutes, extricating Aubrey from the crowd.

 

“There’s too many people milling around,” Aubrey sighed.

 

“Please,” Beca said. “As if I would bring you all the way here, to see Jane Hirshfield and not have a plan up my sleeve.” For the second time that night, Aubrey’s jaw dropped.

 

“What did you do?” Aubrey asked. Beca just motioned for her to turn around. The minder had gotten Jane out of the crowd and asked people to give her a moment, and they were making their way to where Aubrey and Beca stood right now.

 

“Got word of two high schoolers who drove a while just to see me,” she said. “That’s some commitment, ladies.”

 

“I’m Beca, this is Aubrey,” Beca said. “Aubrey’s like, your number one fan.”

 

“It is an honor to meet you,” Aubrey breathed. “I carry this book literally everywhere with me, it’s the reason I love poetry.”

 

“Well, thank you,” Jane said. “Glenda here said you want to go to Princeton and study poetry?” Aubrey shot a quick glance at Beca who was nodding innocently.

 

“That would be a dream come true,” Aubrey said. Jane launched into a quick anecdote about her days at Princeton, simultaneously swiping Aubrey’s book and scrawling an inscription inside the front cover.

 

“Thank you so much,” Aubrey said. “Honestly, I’m never going to forget this night.”

 

“Will you be sticking around for the second half?” Jane asked.

 

“Unfortunately not,” Beca said. “We have an AP class at seven thirty in the morning.”

 

“Oh then let’s take a quick picture, one of you girls surely has one of those smartphones handy,” she said. Beca dug her phone out and handed it to Glenda, who snapped a shot of them. Beca and Aubrey shook Jane’s hand again, thanking her profusely. Beca made sure to thank Glenda specifically and then they headed toward the exit. As soon as they got to the car, Aubrey pressed Beca up against it and kissed her hard.

 

“I take it the surprise was good,” Beca said.

 

“Good?” Aubrey said. “I’m getting teary again just thinking about it. I have never, ever had a night that meant as much to me as this did.” She wrapped her arms around Beca and held her close.

 

“Like I said, I got lucky,” Beca replied. “Or maybe this is the universe’s way of saying we should be together.” Aubrey brushed another soft kiss to her lips.

 

“Thank you for this, Beca,” she said sincerely.

 

“It was honestly my pleasure,” Beca replied, and then she opened Aubrey’s door for her. The drive back was relatively quiet, but Beca didn’t mind because Aubrey had the biggest grin on her face. She kept looking down at the book in her lap as if she couldn’t believe that had just happened. Beca could look at that beautifully happy face all night.

 

She pulled up at Aubrey’s house, seeing the lights on in the front room and assuming the Posens were home. She reached into the backseat of the car and pulled a notebook out of her messenger bag that had been stuffed on the floor.

 

“What’s this for?” Aubrey asked.

 

“Look a bit weird if you went to a seminar and didn’t take any notes,” Beca said. "You can just give them back to me in the morning." She dug around in the bag a bit more and came out with a pen. Aubrey was impressed.

 

“Thanks,” she said. “I know I keep saying this, Beca, but I just can’t believe how amazing this night has been.” Beca pecked her softly and then got out to open her door. She walked her to the front door of the house.

 

“I’ll see you in Spanish in the morning,” Beca said. Aubrey looked reluctant, and Beca knew why. “It’s okay, Bree. I can see your folks are home. I’ll catch you tomorrow, I’m just glad you had such a great time. Now go inside, I’m sure Chloe is expectantly waiting for a call to see how tonight went.”

 

“Yeah, she probably is,” Aubrey agreed. “I’ll see you in the morning, just text me when you get home.” Beca nodded and returned to her car for the drive back to Greenhill. She turned the music up and wound the window down, mind focused on just how beautiful the blonde had looked every second of the night.


	11. Chapter 11

The next morning Beca pulled into the parking lot bright and early for their first class, smiling as she saw her girlfriend waiting for her. She had a little cardboard tray with two coffees sitting next to her on the hood of her car, but before Beca could greet her and pinch a cup, Aubrey got up. Without saying a single word she kissed her hard. Then she smiled and handed her a coffee.

“I’m still so blown away by last night,” she said. “It really was the best night of my life, Beca.”

“I’m glad you enjoyed it,” Beca said. “I had a great time, too.” They headed toward the front gate. 

“It took me so long to get to sleep,” she said. “I kept stupidly thinking that if I fell asleep I’d wake up in the morning and it’d be some weird dream. But that inscription is still in the front of the book and I can’t believe I met Jane Hirshfield.”

“You’re all rambly, it’s very cute,” Beca said as they headed toward the AP Spanish room. They took their seats side by side, waiting for their teacher to come in. None of the other students in the room were paying them any mind, so Aubrey subtly linked their fingers together on Beca’s leg.

“Can I take you out Saturday?” Aubrey asked. “We can go to lunch somewhere.”

“Sure,” Beca said. “Any time I can spend with you, I’m taking it.”

“Oh, that reminds me,” Aubrey said. She dug Beca’s notebook and pen out of her bag. “Thanks for the cover.” The teacher walked in so they turned their attention to the front of the room. 

The day went by pretty quickly, and it wasn’t until lunch that Chloe was able to grab Beca on her own, the redhead snagging her arm and tugging her aside. The first thing she did was hug her hard. Beca was a little surprised to see that she was a bit teary when she finally let go.

“What’s going on here?” Beca asked.

“Um… sorry. It’s just that, well, obviously Aubrey called me last night after you dropped her off and she was just so happy, Beca,” Chloe said. “I know it was just your first date but… this sounds horrible. But I’ve wanted to see her this happy for so long.”

“I’m glad,” Beca said. “That’s all I wanted. I mean… 95% of my motivation was making her happy.”

“And what was the other five then?” Chloe asked, her tone changing. Beca realised how that might sound.

“Oh shit, nothing sleazy,” Beca promised. “Not my style, dude, honest. I just thought… maybe seeing Jane Hirshfield, having that moment of contact with her. Hopefully it might plant even the tiniest seed in her mind to consider doing what she wants for her future and not what her parents want.” Chloe smiled. It was a little sad though, and she turned to survey her best friend.

“That’d be something, though, wouldn’t it?” she said.

“When we were in Atlanta for that debate thing,” Beca said, “I might have said a few things.”

“She told me,” Chloe said. “Sorry. I was the first person she called to talk to about, well… you.”

“So you know that I told her how much more amazing I think she can be if she’s doing something she wants?” Beca said.

“Yep,” Chloe said. “And I agree with you. Let’s hope that tiny little seed takes hold.” Beca nodded and the two of them headed to the lunch table. Aubrey had saved her a spot, so she dropped down into it and felt Aubrey’s hand settling on her knee. 

“Hey, are we studying together this afternoon?” Aubrey asked.

“Definitely,” Beca said. “But I did promise Dad I’d be home in time for dinner.”

“I promise I’ll let you go so you’ll be back in time,” Aubrey said. They went about the rest of the school day as normal, then headed to Starbucks, which was fast becoming their study ritual. Aubrey ordered their coffees while Beca staked a claim on their table. As soon as they’d settled down, side by side, Aubrey kissed her.

“What was that for?” Beca asked. “Not that I’m complaining.”

“It’s because you’re amazing,” Aubrey said. “And I feel safe enough in here to do those kinds of things. My dad and people he knows… Starbucks wouldn’t be on their list of appropriate establishments.”

“Bree,” Beca said. “You know I’ll do whatever I need for you to feel comfortable, and if that includes driving you all the way to Greenhill and back for a date where we don’t have to be worried about who can see us, I’m completely okay with that.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” Aubrey said. She leaned in and kissed Beca again, a little longer this time. She enjoyed the little sigh from Beca when they finally broke apart. They enjoyed their coffee before turning their focus toward their homework, just talking and relaxing with intertwined fingers, coffee cups in their free hands. 

But there was work to be done, so they eventually began focusing on their books and laptops in front of them. Jessica came in for a mid afternoon shift, stopping by to say hi and deliver refills once she’d started. Just as Beca got up to deposit their trash in the bin, she got a text from her dad telling her that dinner was at six thirty. Beca made a note of that, checking the time and seeing she only had a little time before she actually had to hit the road. 

“I gotta take off soon,” Beca said. “Dinner.”

“Yeah, I should probably make an appearance,” Aubrey said. They packed all their stuff and just hung on to the last couple of minutes while they could. Aubrey honestly loved the way Beca just had to have a hand on her, had to be touching her. She looked down at the small hand perched on her knee and wondered if it was stupid to be thinking things like this or if she was only just now noticing things that other people had experienced long before her.

“What’s wrong?” Beca asked.

“Nothing,” she said truthfully. “I’m just taking stock of how much I like being here with you.”

“I like it too,” Beca said. “I mean the studying is one thing but this is a lot more fun. Unfortunately, I really do need to get going so I’m not late for dinner.” They grabbed their things and headed out to the parking lot.

“I’ll see you in the morning,” Beca said. Aubrey nodded and pressed quick kiss to her lips. 

“Let me know when you get home safe?” she asked. Beca said she’d text and got into her car for the drive back to Greenhill. She turned her stereo up and sang along like always, the music managing to make the drive seem faster. When she pulled up in front of the house, she grabbed her stuff and headed inside. She dumped it in her room and immediately texted Aubrey to let her know she was home before she headed down. She offered to set the table and made chatter with her dad and Sheila while they finished up cooking and served dinner up. They talked as they ate. 

“So what time did you get in last night?” her dad asked. “Didn’t you say you were out on a date?”

“Yeah, I got in around eleven,” Beca said. “I had to drop Aubrey off in Barden and then drive back here.”

“So what did you girls get up to?” Sheila asked.

“We ate Spanish food in Exley,” Beca said. “And the biggest piece of good fortune ever is that Jane Hirshfield was at the Exley Community College giving a night on poetry kind of deal. Aubrey is really into her work, loves poetry and we went and caught the first half.”

“You went to see Jane Hirshfield?” her dad said with a slightly envious tone. “That sounds like a great night.”

“Yeah, she was pretty cool,” Beca said. “Oh that reminds me, I should probably text that photo of us to Aubrey.”

“You _met_ Jane Hirshfield?” her dad said. “Wow, now I am jealous. Can I see the picture?” Beca tugged her phone out and showed them the picture.

“And I’m assuming the pretty blonde smiling ear to ear is Aubrey?” Sheila asked. 

“That’s Bree,” Beca confirmed. “I kept it a surprise. She cried. But it was a great night. She hasn’t stopped smiling since.”

“So she’s going to study English in college?” her dad asked.

“Uh… no,” Beca said. “Well, I’m hoping I can change her mind on that. I think she should. But she’s aiming for law at Harvard, like her brothers and her dad and her grandfather and, well, you get it.”

“Ah,” Sheila said. “Family pressure?”

“So much,” Beca said. “But hopefully I can get her to see that success isn’t necessarily ingrained in what her family plan is. I just want her to be happy.”

“Just… be careful,” her dad said. “If they’re as overbearing as you’ve indicated, it’d be unwise to meddle in their private business. I’m not saying you shouldn’t encourage her… just be careful.”

“I will dad,” she said. “I’ve only met her mom once in passing anyway.” They finished up dinner, talking some more, and Beca offered to stack the dishwasher while they made coffee. But Beca did have more homework to do and took her coffee with her.

She was about done with her Physics homework when Sheila appeared in her doorway. Beca turned her music down and gestured for her to come in. She could tell the woman wanted to talk.

“So…” Sheila said. “This is a pretty awkward conversation but I feel like if I get it out there we’ll be okay. You seem like a blunt kind of person.”

“I really am,” Beca said.

“Obviously, your dad and I are getting pretty serious,” Sheila said. “And you’ve never made me feel uncomfortable or unwelcome, and I really appreciate that.”

“Of course not,” Beca said. “Look, I miss my mom and everything, but my dad still deserves to be happy. And you make him happy.”

“I don’t want to replace your mom,” Sheila said. “That’d be weird. And intrusive. But I know that you and your dad don’t always connect when you talk about serious stuff. So if you ever just want to talk, Beca. About stuff like dating, or college or girls, or anything. I’d be there. I’m not your mom, but I think I can give advice if you need it.” Beca paused for a second. This was actually really cool of Sheila.

“Thank you,” she said sincerely. “I really do appreciate it. Because you’re right. I love dad but we’re just on different wavelengths. So I might take you up on that from time to time.”

“Great,” she said. “I mean, I’ve never had kids so I’m going to be figuring it out as I go, but I’ll give it my best shot. You’re almost an adult anyway.”

“That’s cool of you,” Beca said. 

“I’ll leave you to your - yikes. AP Physics?” Sheila said. “Please never ask for help with your science homework, regardless of my previous offer.” Beca had to laugh at that.

“The physics I actually don’t really have any problems with,” Beca said. “But I’ll remember that. Thanks Sheila.”

“Any time,” the other woman said. She disappeared and Beca took a couple of minutes to process the exchange. Sure, Sheila wasn’t her mom, but it was definitely going to be an improvement on her current situation in which she and her dad awkwardly talked around issues and regarded each other warily. She felt pretty okay with the idea of it. 

Saturday rolled around and Beca had insisted that she’d meet Aubrey wherever they were going and not make her drive all the way to Greenhill to pick her up. But Aubrey wanted to take her out somewhere she didn’t have to worry about her father or any of his friends being around. She drove to Beca’s place to pick her up from there. She saw Beca’s car on the street and another two cars in the drive, so she figured that the polite thing to do would be to meet her dad and Sheila. 

She knocked on the door, a little nervously, but ready for this moment. She unconsciously went to smooth the wrinkles out of a skirt she wasn’t even wearing before she caught herself. She was wearing jeans. She shook her head fractionally and the door opened. It was Beca’s dad.

“Hi, Mr Mitchell,” she said, holding out a hand. “Aubrey Posen. I’m here to pick Beca up for lunch.” He shook her hand and held the door.

“Come in,” he said. “Beca got caught up in something she was doing on her computer, she’s running a bit behind. But it’s nice to meet you.”

“You too,” Aubrey said and followed him into the living room.

“Sheila, this is Aubrey,” he introduced. “Aubrey, this is my partner Sheila Delgado.”

“Nice to meet you, too, Ms Delgado,” Aubrey said.

“Sheila is more than fine,” Sheila said. “If you want to head upstairs, Beca is second on the left.”

“Thank you,” Aubrey said. She headed upstairs and found the room, but knocked in case Beca was changing. The brunette in question opened the door and smiled when she saw it was Aubrey.

“Sorry I’m running behind,” she said after a quick kiss. “I got caught up in a mix. Come in, I just need to put some shoes on.” Aubrey stepped into the room and looked around. 

It was kind of sparse, to be honest. Just a room with navy walls and grey shades. A big bed with a small nightstand, a dresser, a mirror on the wall. A handful of black and white photos on the opposite wall. It felt incomplete, like there was something missing. 

“I can see that you’re wondering where all my music and stuff is,” Beca said. She opened a door to a small bathroom, which had another door on the opposite side. It led to a second room in a similar color scheme. And the picture was suddenly complete. 

A desk and a bookshelf. A long table holding music gear and a keyboard, facing a shelving unit that held endless vinyls and a stereo system. Two guitars and a couple of small amps, some music stands, and a couch tucked under the window. Evidently the other room was only for sleeping and changing in, this one was where she did all of her living. 

“I like this room,” Aubrey said. “It feels very like you.”

“It should, it’s my room,” Beca teased. “No, I love it too. And I’ve fallen asleep on that couch more than once after a long night. But I’m ready to go.”

“Okay, let’s go,” Aubrey said. 

“Did my dad and Sheila give you a hard time?” Beca asked as they headed to Aubrey’s car.

“No, just introduced ourselves,” Aubrey said. “They were fine.”

They headed toward the north side of Greenhill, which Beca was okay with. Aubrey must have Googled something she was looking for, because she didn’t ask for directions.

“Where are we headed?” Beca asked.

“So, you’re not the only one with sneaky tactics,” Aubrey said. “I found your friend Luke on Facebook and added him on Messenger to get some background.”

“Oh, you did?” Beca asked. She didn’t seem bothered in the slightest.

“Chloe thinks he’s cute, by the way,” Aubrey added. “Stacie said something about his abs, but… well. Not really either of our type, is he?”

“No,” Beca said. “But he is single, so we could definitely introduce him and Chloe.”

“Anyway,” Aubrey said. “Luke told me your favorite place to eat is the Chinese place in North Greenhill. So we’re going to get takeout, and then we’re going to go and eat it in the park, in the sunshine.”

“That sounds great,” Beca said. “Make you a deal, though. We don’t talk about schoolwork at all.”

“Deal,” Aubrey said. She navigated to the Chinese place and they got out to order. They ordered a ton of food and took it all to the park, Aubrey pulling a picnic rug out of her trunk for them to sit on. They claimed a spot under a tree that had them out of earshot of the families with screaming children and a little more privacy thanks to the neighboring trees. They spread their feast out and grabbed containers at random.

Aubrey was really enjoying this date. It was simple and they didn’t have any added pressure, no worrying about her family or who might see them. They could just relax under their tree, steal each other’s food and once they were too full to move, they just packed the leftovers up and lay on the blanket groaning. 

“See why I love that place so much?” Beca said. “The food is too good, Aubrey. Because I’m legitimately full, but I want to eat the rest of it.”

“Well you can take it back to yours and eat it later,” Aubrey promised.

“That’s a great idea,” she said. “Sheila and Dad are going out this afternoon and won’t be back til later tonight so I’d be fending for myself. Do you have to hurry home or can you stick around?”

“As long as I’m back before dinner at seven I’m fine,” Aubrey said. “We have all afternoon.” They lay there for a bit longer, until the food had settled some more, and Beca rolled over onto her stomach so she could look at Aubrey a little better.

“What?” Aubrey asked. 

“You’re really pretty,” Beca said. “Doesn’t matter what you’re wearing. School uniform? Pretty. That dress you wore on Wednesday? Pretty. Right now in jeans and a tee shirt? Pretty.” Aubrey rolled her eyes and hooked an arm around Beca’s neck to pull her down and kiss her. 

It was a slow lazy kiss, and it set the tempo for the next half hour or so. They didn’t push it anywhere that would raise eyebrows given their public location, but they definitely made the most of their semi-secluded lunch spot. Beca was trying to be mindful that all of this, even the physical side of it, was new to Aubrey. But the blonde would barely let her pull back for more than a couple of seconds before she was tugging her back in to kiss her again. She couldn’t really bring herself to protest though, because she was enjoying it immensely. But they soon sat up and gathered themselves together.

“If you don’t have to be home for a little while, did you want to come back to my place?” Beca asked. “We can just hang out, listen to some music.”

“Will you show me what you’re working on?” Aubrey asked. 

“Sure,” Beca said. They headed back to her place, stopping for coffee on the way. Sheila and her dad were already gone when they got back, so they simply headed upstairs and Beca pulled her laptop out to cue up what she’d been working on. 

“This is incredible,” Aubrey said. “I don’t know if you realised it at the time but when we were in Atlanta for debate, you were singing in the shower. I couldn’t help but just listen to you and that’s when I realised I couldn’t keep fighting the way I felt about you. Your voice is gorgeous, Beca. As is the rest of you.” Beca shifted the laptop off to the side and kissed her in response. Aubrey responded eagerly, but Beca caught herself.

They were supposed to be taking things slowly. But here they were making out on a couch in her house, empty of all other people, on only their second official date. This could get out of hand very quickly and that’s not what she wanted. She didn’t want Aubrey to ever look back and decide she regretted any single part of their relationship. So she slowed the kiss and broke it off. Aubrey looked at her with questioning eyes.

“In my experience,” Beca said, “making out in empty houses leads to things we aren’t ready for, Bree. We don’t have to rush. I love kissing you, a lot, but we’re only two dates in.” Aubrey smiled at her and then leaned down against her shoulder.

“So show me some more of your music,” she said. “We can just sit here and listen together.” Beca pulled the laptop over and wrapped her other arm around Aubrey’s shoulders. This was shaping up to be an amazing way to waste an afternoon.


	12. Chapter 12

Over the next few weeks, they happily continued on in the same way. School, study dates pretty regularly, and hanging out together on weekends. They doubled a couple of times with Ashley and Jess, which was nice. But most of the time they just ended up getting something to eat or some coffee and then spent time relaxing, taking a break from the hectic pace of their AP schedules.

It felt like Aubrey was getting more comfortable with being in a relationship. With being with a girl. She still talked about her parents and how she was terrified of how she was going to handle telling them about Beca. It didn’t bother Beca at all that she still hadn’t told her parents - she just wanted Aubrey to be happy and it sounded like no matter who you asked, the Posens were very intimidating people. Aubrey had come to the house more often, and both her dad and Sheila commented on how great a girl she was. Beca could only agree.

Before Beca knew what was happening they’d been together three months. They were on the couch at her place, and her dad and Sheila were out, staying the night at Sheila’s place. They were pretty entangled on the couch, something that had been happening with more and more frequency lately. They still hadn’t gone further than making out just yet, though, just killing time until they met up with Beca’s friend Luke for dinner.

But this time Beca felt Aubrey’s hand slipping just inside her shirt. It was slow and hesitant and didn’t really go anywhere. It was just soft fingers hesitantly stroking against her skin. This was the first time Aubrey had shown signs of wanting to take things further. Beca waited a beat and then pulled back a little.

“Bree?” she asked. “You okay there?”

“Um… I’ve never - done this,” Aubrey said. “I mean, if you’re okay with it… and I mean, I want to…”

“I’m okay with anything,” Beca said. “As long as you’re ready for it. Be honest, Aubrey. What do you want?” Aubrey turned bright red. 

“I want to touch you,” she said. Beca shifted and struggled behind her back for a second, before unclasping her bra, unhooking it and tossing it aside.

“So kiss me,” Beca said. “And when you’re ready, go ahead.” 

They resumed their previous activity, Aubrey leaning down into Beca’s body as they fell back against the arm of the couch. It didn’t take long for Aubrey’s hand to slide back under her shirt. It wasn’t as hesitant as before, the hand was sliding along her skin with more confidence. For the moment, it was just Aubrey becoming accustomed to how it felt. From where Beca was sitting, it felt pretty great. 

It felt even better when the hand began to move up a little higher. It smoothed up her side and then Beca could feel the back of her fingers on the underside of her breast. She had to restrain herself from sucking in a deep breath as Aubrey’s hand closed over her breast firmly. Beca didn’t manage to stop herself from letting out a little noise, which caused Aubrey to palm it and grab it just a little harder. 

Aubrey’s mind was spinning. She literally had her hand on a girl’s boob. And it was awesome. She was touching Beca’s breast. She fleetingly thought that if there had been any lingering thought in her head that she might not be gay, it was one hundred percent gone now. She was so, so gay, and she was ready to explode right now. But she just kept kissing, kept listening out for the little cues from Beca as she touched her in case she was doing anything wrong. But it didn’t seem like she was, it was all going perfectly.

The only thing she wished was that Beca would touch her back. Beca obviously sensed something at this moment, because she pulled back.

“You okay?” Beca whispered. They were both panting a little and Aubrey’s cheeks turned scarlet. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong,” she said. “Just... the first time I’ve done that. And it was really, really great. But I kind of wanted-”

“What is it, Bree?” she asked. “You don’t have to be nervous. You can tell or ask me anything, I swear.”

“I wanted you to touch me, too,” she admitted. Their eyes met and Aubrey bit down on her lip.

“You sure?” Beca asked. She nodded and Beca let her fingers play lightly with the ends of her hair. “Well, I can do that. But if things start to push too far, you gotta promise to let me know. We don’t have to hurry.”

“I know,” Aubrey said. “And I don’t want us to go that far - you know, but I was really enjoying touching you and all I could think was that I wished your hands were on me too.” That was an incredibly hot thing for Beca to hear. She pulled Aubrey onto her lap, waiting until the taller girl had straddled her legs. She tangled their fingers together.

“You one hundred percent sure you’re okay with this?” she asked. Aubrey nodded.

“It’s been almost three months,” Aubrey said. “I don’t think anyone could accuse us of moving too fast. You’ve been really respectful and concerned about my feelings so far, and I appreciate that. But I’m ready for this. And what’s more, I want it.”

“Okay then,” Beca said with a smile.

“Thank you, though,” Aubrey added. She leaned down and kissed Beca softly and they let themselves get carried away in the embrace again. After they had been kissing awhile, Beca let her hands move inside Aubrey’s shirt. She slipped them around and caressed her back gently, marveling at how soft the skin was. She took her time, letting Aubrey get used to the feeling of hands on her skin. When she brushed the underside of Aubrey’s bra with the back of her fingertips, she felt the blonde suck a breath in. So she made the last move and let the fingers gently pry the soft sports bra out of the way so she could touch her properly. Aubrey made a half gasping, half moaning sound as she felt Beca’s hands on her, and helped her get the sports bra off, taking a moment to untangle it from her shirt as they did so, shimmying it out her sleeve and tossing it away.

They wouldn’t have parted if the room was on fire. Beca had no idea how many minutes were passing them by, and Aubrey was equally unconcerned until her phone began to ring. Aubrey sighed, but obediently got up in case it was her parents. Beca wasn’t about to get the girl into trouble at home because she was too busy making out with her to answer the phone, after all. But it wasn’t her parents.

“It’s Chloe,” Aubrey said. “I can ignore it.”

“No, answer,” Beca said. “It’s probably best if we back off just a little bit anyway. I’ll go get some drinks.” Aubrey nodded but stopped Beca as she passed to kiss her mid sentence to Chloe. Beca headed downstairs, breathing deeply to calm her racing heart. Aubrey was so new to all of this stuff, but she was leaving Beca breathless more often than not. And she’d loved what had just happened upstairs, but it was for the best that they cooled off. She grabbed a couple of bottles of Coke from the fridge and headed back upstairs. 

“Hey,” Aubrey said, not even bothering to cover the mouthpiece. “Chlo is in Exley with her mom, she wanted to know what we were doing. Can I tell her to come over and she can come to dinner with us and Luke?”

“For sure,” Beca said. “Tell her we can come pick her up if her mom wants.” Aubrey relayed the message to her, the two of them discussing some details before Aubrey hung up the phone.

“Her mom will drop her here,” Aubrey said. “And I’ll drop her off at home after dinner.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Beca said. “Plus, I haven’t forgotten that she thinks Luke is cute.”

“Neither have I,” Aubrey said with a smirk. Beca handed her a drink and they settled back into the couch. Aubrey immediately tangled their fingers together and they drank their drinks in silence for a few moments.

“You okay with what happened just before?” Beca asked her.

“Yeah, I am,” Aubrey said. “Very okay with it. This is going to sound stupid but… man, I am really, really gay.” Beca couldn’t help but grin at that one.

“Oh really?” she asked.

“You think I’m stupid,” Aubrey fake pouted. Beca kissed her reassuringly.

“No, babe, not at all,” she said. “Everyone has one of those moments where it’s just irrefutable, you know?”

“Coz like, I knew I was gay,” Aubrey said, “But I have to say, when I had my hands on your boobs… it was like that last tiny lingering doubt was absolutely gone forever. Because I liked that a lot.” She put her drink down and pulled Beca toward her again. It was softer and less handsy, but Aubrey still felt her head spinning more and more with every second.

They only stopped when Chloe rang the doorbell to signal she’d arrived. Beca went down to let her in and Aubrey completely forgot about the fact that she and Beca were both sans bra until Chloe walked into the room and spotted said undergarments on the floor.

“Oh, I’m interrupting something,” she said. Beca smiled.

“Oh, shit no, you’re not,” she said. “I swear.” She snagged her bra and excused herself to put it on. Aubrey didn’t mind putting hers back on in front of Chloe.

“Bree?” Chloe asked.

“Well you’re not interrupting anything now,” Aubrey said pointedly. “Earlier, yes.”

“How serious are you talking here?” Chloe asked. 

“Just a little fooling around,” Aubrey said. “It was nice. I liked it a lot.” Beca came back into the room. 

“Sorry about that Chlo,” she said. “Do you want a drink or anything?”

“No, I’m cool,” Chloe said. “So this is the room where all of the Beca Mitchell magic happens.”

“Yeah,” Beca said. They talked about music for a while, Beca played her a few of the songs she’d been working on lately, the three of them killing time until it was time to leave for dinner. It wasn’t anywhere fancy, just down to the place where Luke and Beca liked to shoot pool. The food was pretty good, just standard burger fare, and it played good music to boot.

“Hope you don’t mind,” Beca said as she showed Chloe into the booth, “But we brought an extra. Luke, this is Chloe. Chloe, this is Luke.” They ordered a round of Cokes to start and a bunch of onion rings and cheesy fries, and just sat around talking for a while. 

Aubrey had been up to Greenhill to spend time with Beca and Luke a few times now. It was weird, she didn’t have the same sort of fear of being found out up here, just an hour away. Luke was nice, too. Definitely a good friend to Beca, which was most important to her, but he also never made her feel weird or awkward.

Chloe being added to the mix didn’t make things any weirder either. Not that Beca or Aubrey thought it would, the girl could talk her way into a group in three seconds flat and was everyone’s best friend inside an hour. They ordered burgers and demolished them pretty quickly before claiming a table for a couple rounds of pool. They settled on teams pretty quickly, Luke calling Greenhill versus Barden. He was quick with the trash talk, and Beca was extremely worried when she saw Aubrey and Chloe exchange a knowing glance and a smile. 

Luke and Beca spent a lot of time playing pool over the years. It was a place where Beca felt safe and she didn’t have to talk about anything that was bothering her with Luke if she didn’t want to. So they were pretty good. But it turned out, Chloe was better. 

“Whoa,” Beca said, “Where did this come from?” Chloe had just finished sinking half the table on her first touch of the cue.

“What, like you have the monopoly on pool now?” Chloe said. “There’s a table in our basement, Beca. My dad taught me when I was like five.” Luke and Beca’s expertise was no match for Chloe’s game and Aubrey wasn’t exactly a pushover either, with her understanding of physics, the two Barden girls wiping the Greenhill pair off the table easily.

“I’ll grab drinks,” Aubrey said as Luke began to reassemble the balls for a second game. Beca couldn’t help but notice the way Luke’s eyes instinctively tracked to Chloe’s ass as she leaned across the table to retrieve an errant ball. She almost rolled her eyes, but Luke was a nineteen year old boy and Chloe was an eighteen year old girl with an admittedly nice ass. She had to concede that at least. 

At the end of the second round they figured they should call it a night since Chloe and Aubrey still had to drive back to Barden. They paid the bill and headed out to the parking lot. They said goodbye to Luke, but before Beca got into the car, he pulled her aside. 

“So that Chloe chick,” he said quietly. “Do me a favor and see if she’d mind giving me her number? She’s something else.”

“Will do,” Beca said. “We’ll catch up soon?” He nodded and waited until they were in the car before he headed toward his own. Beca drove them back to her place so Aubrey could drive herself and Chloe home.

“So Chlo,” Beca said as they pulled into her driveway, “Luke asked me for your number, if you’re interested.”

“In that guy?” Chloe said. “Uh yes, I’m interested. I know I said he was cute from your Facebook Beca, but damn. Plus that accent?”

“I’ll pass it along then,” she said with a grin. They got out and Beca ducked inside to grab Aubrey’s stuff for her. Chloe was already in the car. 

“So call me when you get home,” Beca said to her girlfriend. “And drive safe.” Aubrey leaned in and kissed her for a moment.

“I will,” Aubrey said. She got into the car and began heading toward Barden.

“You seem really happy, Bree,” Chloe said after a while.

“Sorry?” Aubrey said.

“With Beca,” Chloe said. “I mean, I know I see you guys at school all the time and at Starbucks and stuff, but up here with no pressure and all that… you just look really happy.” Aubrey couldn’t help but smile.

“I am,” she said. “I really am. I’m so happy I sometimes wonder if mom and dad can’t tell. Because I feel like it’s something people can tell.”

“I can,” Chloe said. “I love it. I love seeing you like this.” She squeezed her best friend’s hand for a second.

“I still feel bad for having to hide this though,” Aubrey said. “But she says she doesn’t even mind. She’s been so incredible about the whole thing.”

“Are you thinking you’re going to tell your parents one day soon?” Chloe asked. 

“I think about it a lot,” Aubrey confessed. “Like maybe I’d tell mom first. She’s met Beca a few times now. She likes her. I don’t think it’d be too bad. But then I just worry about dad and I throw the whole thing out the window again.” 

“Well if you need me to be there when you decide to do it,” Chloe said, “You know you only gotta say the word.”

“Thanks,” Aubrey said. She sighed. “It just feels unfair to Beca.”

She dropped Chloe off at her place before heading home, getting in at about ten thirty. It wasn’t too late. Her mother was up, making tea in the kitchen.

“How was dinner with your friends?” her mother asked.

“Really good,” Aubrey said, an involuntary smile making its way across her face. 

“Sit down. Want some tea?” her mother offered. Aubrey nodded and sat at the kitchen counter with her mother. Something felt big about this moment. She wasn’t sure what yet. 

“Thank you,” she said, taking the cup.

“I’ve noticed recently,” her mother said, “how much happier you seem. Not to say you were miserable before. But the past four months or so, you’ve really… it’s a noticeable change. You seem happier than I really remember you being before. I like it. I sometimes used to worry that you weren’t… fulfilled.”

“I am happy mom,” Aubrey said. She could see her mother was waiting for something more. But she didn’t think she could do it.

“I’m glad,” she said. She made a move to get up and Aubrey felt herself speaking again.

“Mom, wait,” Aubrey said. She took a deep breath. “It’s not accidental that I’m this happy, or that you’ve noticed it recently.” She was out there now. Her heart was beating faster, she could feel it. But she may as well go for it.

“It’s not?”

“No,” Aubrey said. “I’ve met someone and we’re dating. They’re the one making me really happy. But I’ve been really scared to say something to you and to daddy because… well…” She began to tear up. This was precisely what she didn’t want to happen. 

“Aubrey, what’s the matter?” her mother asked. “Why are you crying?” Aubrey took a moment to pull herself together.

“Mom, I’ve been terrified to tell you…” she said, dropping her eyes to the floor. “It’s Beca. The person I’m dating is Beca.” She looked up hesitantly. Her mother’s face changed a couple of times as she realised what that meant.

“Oh,” she said. “Little Beca with the earrings?” Aubrey nodded, fiddled with her teacup. This was unbearable. The few small seconds felt like a year.

“That Beca, yes,” Aubrey said. “And I want you to know mom, that she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. She’s kind and courteous and respectful, she challenges me in every regard, she just wants the best for me.”

“So you’re a - - lesbian?” her mother said. “Or is it just Beca?” Aubrey was surprised that her mother was still sitting there and not yelling. 

“Um, I’ve always known that I was gay,” Aubrey said. “Beca was the one who made it impossible to ignore any more.”

“Aubrey please don’t tell me all this studying you two have been doing-”

“No, mom,” Aubrey said. “We really do study. And neither of our grades have declined since we got together. In fact, both of our government scores have gone up. She knows how important school is to me, and she’s the same.”

“And she’s not… pressuring you?”

“No, she would never do that,” Aubrey said. “She’s sweet and thoughtful and considerate and patient. And it might border on too much information but we definitely aren’t sleeping together. I’m not ready for that, and she’s perfectly okay with it.” At that exact moment her phone buzzed. 

_Hey are you home yet? Bit worried._

“She’s just texting to make sure I got home safe,” Aubrey said with a soft smile. 

“Aubrey, I’m not going to pretend this isn’t a shock,” her mother said. “It is. But how can I be upset when I’ve just said that I’ve noticed how happy you’ve become?”

“You’re not mad?” Aubrey asked.

“Mad?” her mother asked. “Aubrey, come here. How can I be mad at you for being happy?” She held her daughter close, and Aubrey felt herself crying again. 

“But what do I tell daddy?” she asked.

“Well… let’s just not tell him right this minute,” her mom said. “He might be a bit tricky to handle with this one, so we can come up with a plan together. But you don’t have to hide from me, Aubrey. I love you. And if Beca’s making you happy, then who am I to stop that?”

“I love you too, mom,” she said. 

“And we should set up dinner for the three of us,” her mother said. “Soon.”

“Thank you,” Aubrey said. She was still sniffling.

“Now go call her back so she doesn’t worry,” her mom said. “But if you want to talk, Aubrey, come find me.” Aubrey nodded and took her tea with her, pulling out her cell phone to call Beca once she’d reached her room.

“Oh you’re okay,” Beca said. “Thank god. I was about to call Chloe.”

“Um, I just told my mum about you,” Aubrey said with a slight sniffle. “About us.”

“Are you okay?” Beca asked. “Are you crying?”

“I was,” Aubrey said. “I was scared. But it actually went okay. I haven’t told my dad, and we’re not going to do that just yet, but mom was… okay.”

“Wow,” Beca said. “I’m really proud of you, Bree. How did it even happen?”

“Well on the way back Chlo and I were talking about how happy I am and when I got home, mom said the same thing. That’s she’s noticed how much happier I’ve been since we got together,” Aubrey said. “So I told her there was a specific reason why, and that it was you.”

“You make me happy, too,” Beca said. “Like, ridiculously happy.”

“She wants to have dinner though,” Aubrey warned her.

“I’m okay with that,” Beca said. “Any time she likes. You’re definitely okay though? You don’t need me to come down there or anything?”

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Aubrey said. “But thanks. I know you’d be down here in a second if I asked.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” Beca said. Aubrey hung up and before she went to bed she realised she wanted to tell Chloe as well, since they’d just been talking about it.

“Bree?” Chloe asked.

“Hey,” Aubrey said. “So I just um… you know. Came out to my mom and told her about Beca.”

“Oh my god,” Chloe said. “Are you okay?”

“I am,” Aubrey said. “Truly. Still not going there with dad just yet but it feels so good not to have that weight on my shoulders, you know?”

“That’s huge,” Chloe said. “And awesome. Your mom was okay?”

“Yeah, she kind of just was saying that she’d noticed how happy I’ve been lately so I told her why,” Aubrey said. “She said that me being happy wasn’t anything she could be mad over.”

“That’s really cool, Bree, I’m so happy for you,” Chloe said. 

“We can talk more tomorrow, but I wanted to tell you,” Aubrey said. “Since you’re my best friend.”

“See you tomorrow, Bree,” Chloe said. Aubrey hung up but she couldn’t get the smile off of her face, not until she fell asleep that night.


	13. Chapter 13

Aubrey kind of wanted to get dinner with her mom over sooner rather than later so she asked Beca if the Thursday of the following week would be okay. Beca was fine with it and Aubrey set up dinner for the three of them.

Whilst Beca wasn’t exactly nervous about the dinner, she wasn’t planning on going in completely unprepared. She figured rather than burden Aubrey with any additional stress, she’d talk to Chloe about it. The redhead had said that Mrs Posen was definitely a bit old school but she was nice, and she really just wanted her daughter to be happy more than anything. Beca was at least confident that she could impress upon Aubrey’s mom that they basically wanted the same thing. 

Beca met them at a restaurant in Exley - a suggestion of Mrs Posen, lest someone see them and tell Aubrey’s father what they were up to. She’d debated wearing a dress for all of ten minutes before she decided she’d rather not be uncomfortable and settled on pants and a perfectly tailored button down in a deep burgundy. Aubrey looked amazing in her mint coloured dress and Beca was stuck in a daze for a moment before she realised she should greet Aubrey’s mother.

“Mrs Posen, it’s nice to see you again,” Beca said. They chatted while they waited to be led to their table, Beca pulling the chair for her girlfriend. A few moments passed as they perused the menu and drinks were brought to the table, but then they settled in and talked comfortably. Beca had expected this. She was pretty sure Mrs Posen wouldn’t make Aubrey uncomfortable during the meal, she’d wait til her daughter ducked to the bathroom and talk to Beca then. 

She was dead right, naturally. Aubrey excused herself after the main course and shot Beca a nervous glance as she shuffled off toward the bathroom. Beca turned to face Mrs Posen expectantly.

“Go ahead,” she said. “I’m sure there are things you want to say.”

“I was surprised when Aubrey filled me in to the extent of your relationship,” she admitted. “It honestly had never even entered my mind that she might be gay. But she’s just so happy with you, Beca. It was a noticeable change.”

“I want to apologise for the fact that we kept it from you so long,” Beca said. “I really just didn’t want to pressure Aubrey into coming out before she was ready. I didn’t want her to have to undergo the things I went through.”

“It was bad for you?” 

“Quite bad,” Beca said. “Not at home. My mom was fine with it. Same with my dad and his new partner. But school was unbearable. Let’s just say class schedule wasn’t the only reason I switched to Barden.”

“Oh I’m sorry to hear that,” Mrs Posen said. “But Aubrey - at school? Is everything okay?”

“We don’t flash it around,” Beca said. “People don’t pay us any attention. I’m not really an in your face kind of person. I just love your daughter a lot. She makes me happy. And I’m pretty sure I make her happy too.”

“You love her?”

“More than anything,” Beca said. “And I know you probably have a lot of questions and concerns about everything. I don’t mind answering them if you want me to. Even if it’s not now.”

“You’re not pressuring her or anything? You’re respecting my little girl?” Mrs Posen asked.

“I promise you that she’s being treated properly. I would never rush her or hurry her,” Beca said. “In fact when this all started I made Aubrey take the time to figure out whether this was something she really wanted.”

“Okay then,” her mother said. “I guess I can’t ask for more than that. And like I said, Beca, she seems so happy. I can’t be against that. But her father might not be so understanding.”

“I know,” Beca said. “That’s why we tend to go up to Greenhill.” Aubrey returned to the table and they picked up the evening right where they had left off. Dessert was brought and not long after Beca said it was probably time to call it a night since they both had an early class. Aubrey’s mom paid for the meal, for which Beca thanked her profusely, and pressed a kiss to Aubrey’s cheek as she walked her to the car.

“I’ll see you in the morning,” Aubrey said.

“Yep,” Beca said. “I’ll end up stopping for coffee, probably. Want me to bring you one?”

“Thanks,” Aubrey said. “And text me when you make it home.”

“I will,” Beca promised. Aubrey’s mom waited until she saw Beca get into her car on the opposite side of the street before she navigated out. The stereo came on automatically and she turned it down, fully aware that Aubrey was about to say something.

“So what did you think of Beca?” Aubrey asked nervously.

“I have some questions,” her mother said. “Is she always pulling your chair and opening doors or was that just to impress me?”

“No she does that all the time,” Aubrey said. “And she offers her jacket if it’s cold.”

“And she said school used to be rough for her?”

“She was bullied pretty badly,” Aubrey said. “But not at Barden.”

“She said she loves you,” her mother said. That brought a smile to Aubrey’s face. “Do you love her?”

“I do,” she said. “Mom she’s smart and she’s sweet, she’s kind and thoughtful and she’s so talented when it comes to music that it amazes me.”

“She’s a musician?”

“She can play anything, it feels like,” Aubrey said. “I’ve seen her play a piano, guitar, ukulele, violin, cello, flute, drums, she can write music and arrange it and it’s so good.”

“You do love her,” her mother said. “You should see your face.”

“Mom when I met Beca, I’d been ignoring the being gay thing for so long,” Aubrey said. “I just ignored it, hoping it would go away. But she just made it impossible. I love her a lot.”

“We’ll have to come up with a way to break this to your dad,” her mother said. “But I’m all for it. Honest. Answered everything I asked. She’s a nice girl. Even if she does have tattoos.”

“You saw those?”

“How many does she have?” her mother asked.

“Four,” Aubrey said. “She had a bit of a hard time when her mom died. Rebelled a little. But she got through it. She wants to make her mom proud.”

“Oh, she did mention her dad had a new partner but not that her mother had passed,” she said. “That’s horrible.”

“I know Beca still misses her,” Aubrey said. “I can see it when she talks about her. But I’m glad you like her mom.”

“She offered to answer questions for me,” her mother said. “On any of this stuff, whenever I like. It was a brave move for someone in her position. I’d like to learn a bit more about her, but you don’t need to worry, Aubrey. What I know about her, I like.”

“Except the tattoos,” Aubrey said with a smile.

“Well… I’m not a fan of tattoos in general,” her mother said. “But you kids are a different generation and that set of headphones, I guess, suits her very well. What are the rest?”

“She has a grasshopper,” Aubrey said. “Bit further up her arm. It’s a childhood nickname. She has flowers on one shoulder. And some song lyrics on her back, a favourite song of her mom’s.”

“Which song?” her mother asked. Aubrey was surprised that she wanted to know.

“Ruby Tuesday,” she replied. “It’s a Rolling Stones song, but Beca said her mom used to love a cover version Melanie Safka did.”

“I know the version,” her mother said. “But it’s clear to me that you do know a great deal about this girl.”

“I keep telling you, Ma, she’s really important to me,” Aubrey said. Her mom looked over and smiled at her.

“I am so, so glad you’re happy,” she replied. They drove the rest of the way in relative silence, Aubrey turning the radio up slightly so she could hum and sing along as they drove. 

Beca arrived to class the next morning a few minutes before it started and handed Aubrey a cup of coffee. Then she slid the messenger bag off of her shoulder and dug her books out. She looked tired, and Aubrey worried a little.

“You okay?” she asked. 

“Oh, yeah,” Beca said. “It’s self inflicted, so I’ll be okay. I got caught up writing a song and then all of a sudden it was after two thirty am.”

“Two thirty!” Aubrey said. “Beca.”

“I know,” Beca said. “Like I said, self inflicted. Let’s just hope I gave you the right coffee, because one has three shots in it.” Aubrey’s eyes widened and she swivelled both cups to make sure she wasn’t about to consume a ridiculous amount of caffeine. Beca’s did have a notation on the side for extra shots so she picked up her own.

Beca struggled to get started all day. She managed to not do anything incredibly stupid all day but she was definitely off her game. During the last class of the day, Aubrey told her she should come back to her place after school.

“Come home with me,” Aubrey said. “I’ll drive you back to my place, you can have a nap. I don’t like the idea of you driving back home when you’re about to fall asleep in class.” Beca just nodded, eyes and head heavy, too tired to argue.

Class let out and Beca gathered what she needed from her locker before meeting Aubrey at her car. She got in, Aubrey driving, and texted her dad to tell him she’d be home later. Aubrey shook her head at her girlfriend as she almost dozed off in the car. But she made it all the way back to Aubrey’s place. Her mom was home, but her dad was not. So after a little small talk, Beca and Aubrey headed upstairs. Aubrey changed and Beca tugged her shoes off, removed her jacket and tie, and immediately climbed onto Aubrey’s bed.

“Mind if I study in here while you rest?” she asked.

“Not at all,” Beca said. “Just wake me if I don’t resurface by five so I make it home for dinner.” Aubrey leaned down to kiss her on the forehead gently and Beca smiled as she closed her eyes. It didn’t take her long to fall asleep, Aubrey had barely cracked her first book. She covered Beca up so she didn’t get cold and kept on with her homework. 

She didn’t hear a peep out of Beca until just before four thirty, the smaller girl shifting and rolling over on the bed. She sat up, stretching a little and Aubrey turned around.

“Oh,” Aubrey said. “Feeling a bit better?”

“Yeah, definitely,” Beca said. Aubrey got up and came over to the bed, settling down next to Beca.

“Promise me you’ll get to bed at a decent hour tonight,” she said.

“Promise,” Beca replied. “Thanks for letting me nap in your bed.” Aubrey kissed her gently, tongue slipping into her mouth.

“I love you,” she said to the brunette. “A lot.”

“I love you too,” Beca said.

“But it’s almost four thirty and you do have to get home for dinner,” Aubrey said. “I can drop you back at your car.”

“Yeah, I’ll wash up and then it’s probably time to start heading back to Greenhill,” Beca said. She got up and headed into Aubrey’s bathroom and then came back to put her shoes and jacket back on. 

“I don’t feel like this was an adequate use of time spent together,” she said to Aubrey, who slid her arms around her. “Let me make it up to you and take you out on Saturday.”

“Definitely,” Aubrey said. She left a soft kiss on her lips before they headed back downstairs, Aubrey stopping to tell her mother she was just dropping Beca off at the high school so she could pick up her car.

Once Beca got home she texted Aubrey to tell her she was there and greeted her dad and Sheila. They were cooking, and Beca said she wanted to take a quick shower before dinner so she went upstairs. She was now behind on homework, but she knew that if she’d attempted anything being as tired as she was that afternoon, it would have been horrible anyway. 

After dinner she pulled some homework out and made steady progress. She had music playing as she did - she didn’t like silence - and barely noticed her phone flashing at her. It was just Aubrey.

[It’s almost eleven Beca go to bed. You don’t need a repeat of today.] Beca smiled at her girlfriend’s concern.

[Yes dear. Though sleeping in a bed that smelled like you was mighty nice.] She began packing all of her stuff up, sticking the books she needed for the next day into her bag, and then climbed into bed. Her phone was showing another message.

[I love you.] She sent back a reciprocal text, finding that despite her afternoon nap she was still exhausted. Normally it took her a while to power down and fall asleep, but tonight it was almost instantaneous. 

School progressed fine for the rest of the week. Nothing was out of the ordinary, though Beca had received a couple of texts from Luke. He and Chloe were texting a bit, flirting definitely, and he was thinking about asking her out and wondered if she might be more comfortable on a double date to begin with.

Beca responded that Chloe was the kind of girl who would be fine on any kind of date, she was just a social, interactive creature, but that she’d talk to Chloe and Aubrey and see if that was something they might be interested in.

It turned out they were, and Luke and Beca were soon booked in to take Chloe and Aubrey to dinner and to see a band Luke liked up near where he went to school. It wasn’t until the weekend after next though, so Beca still made good on her promise to take Aubrey out on the weekend. 

They had made plans to have a picnic in the park and just enjoy a free Saturday. The weather had other plans though; it was rainy and kind of cold for that time of year. So Aubrey drove up to Beca’s place, the two of them planning to order a pizza and just hang out. Aubrey knew Beca didn’t really like watching movies, but the smaller girl had said she didn’t mind watching one every now and then if Aubrey wanted to. Plus, Beca said, it was definitely the best kind of weather for curling up under a blanket together.

Beca’s dad and Sheila were home when the pizza arrived, but left not long after. They were staying at Sheila’s that night so Beca had the house to herself. The two girls just camped out in the living room under a thick quilt and ate their pizza, then Aubrey put a movie on while Beca snuggled up against her. Aubrey was warm and Beca got drowsy, dozing off a little against her for the middle of the movie. 

When the movie was over they stayed there, talking, fingers fiddling with each others a little as they did. After a while it turned into soft kisses, and then Aubrey began pushing against Beca to lay her down on the couch. They let their bodies settle into place against each other and Beca just looked up at her for a moment. 

“You’re pretty,” she said. Aubrey blushed. She always did, she couldn’t help it. She leaned down and kissed Beca, revelling at the feeling of Beca’s arms wrapping around her. She was positively tiny, to be frank, but for some reason Aubrey was always so comforted by the slight weight of those arms. 

They began to get carried away, hands moving under shirts now as the kisses grew deeper and longer. Aubrey’s body was pressed tight against Beca and they were absolutely lost in each other. Beca’s body was on fire, pure and simple. Aubrey was something she would willingly drown in over and over. She still seemed a little nervous at times and then she’d kiss her like she was doing now and it felt like there was no hesitation at all. 

She let her hand smooth downward, sliding it into the back of Aubrey’s jeans. There wasn’t much room for her to grab onto her ass or anything, so she slid it out and squeezed her ass over her jeans. She felt Aubrey gasp slightly and the taller girl’s pelvis rocked slightly. Beca felt Aubrey’s teeth nip at her bottom lip and the blonde pulled away just a little.

“Beca?” she asked.

“Yeah?” she replied, brushing some hair from Aubrey’s face and tucking it behind your ear.

“I’m really enjoying this but I honestly… I think we need more room,” Aubrey said. “Can we go upstairs?”

“Bree?” Beca asked. “This is what you want?”

“I don’t know if I’m ready to have sex,” she said simply, her face coloring a little pink. “But I love being able to touch you and I want to be able to keep doing what we’re doing but with a bit more freedom.” Beca nodded and they got up, ignoring the mess and headed up to Beca’s room.

“Want me to put some music on?” she offered. Aubrey nodded and Beca picked something that seemed to fit their mood. But this time as they crawled up onto the pillows, Aubrey shifted underneath Beca so that the smaller girl was now straddling her. It definitely was a lot easier now they had more space. Their elbows weren’t colliding with the back of the couch and there wasn’t the ever-present fear that one jolt too far would send someone crashing to the floor. 

They made out for a while longer, hands comfortably brave as they slid surely across each other’s skin. Beca soon discovered that her girlfriend was, in fact, braless underneath her knitted cardigan and tee. But Aubrey began to fidget underneath her before long, attempting to wrestle the cardigan off. Beca sat up, straddling her thighs, giving her room to take it off. But she noticed that the blonde was also fidgeting with the hem of her shirt. She took stock of the moment for a second.

“You wanna take it off?” Beca asked. Aubrey bit her lip and nodded.

“Is that okay?” she asked. “Or is it too much?”

“Babe, I’m happy with whatever you want,” she said. “I just don’t want to push you, but if you’re comfortable, then go for it.”

“Will you take yours off?” she asked. 

“If you want me to, absolutely,” Beca said. Aubrey removed her t-shirt and then helped push Beca’s shirt off as well. She waited as Beca undid her bra and tossed it away, after which she just sat there for a moment looking at her half naked girlfriend’s chest. Beca’s hair was spilling over her shoulders and the contrast with her pale skin was incredibly abrupt. It was beautiful. She pulled Beca back down on top of her again and they resumed where they’d left off.

Aubrey loved the way Beca felt in her hands. She had bigger boobs than she should, Aubrey felt. She was so tiny, but the breasts in her hands were comparatively large. She also was really into the way they were skin on skin now. It was definitely a cold day, but they weren’t feeling it at all. 

Beca began kissing her way down Aubrey’s neck, along her collarbone, the blonde sighing as she did. The lips moved further down and began to slow. Aubrey knew she was waiting for some kind of signal to keep going so she murmured that it was okay, and then she almost died.

She was not ready for how a girl’s lips felt on her nipple. How a tongue felt, swirling over it, the soft sting of teeth. Her eyes rolled back in her head and she closed them, unable to focus on anything but Beca’s mouth on her. They were completely lost, ignoring the fact that the wind and rain outside was getting a lot worse, until everything around them went dark and silent. 

Beca sat up and waited for a second. She noticed that the storm had really picked up outside.

“Babe, I think the power blew,” she said.

“Okay,” was all Aubrey could manage. She was still very much fighting her arousal. 

“I can check the fuses, they’re in the basement,” Beca said. She felt her way off the bed and grabbed a hoodie, tossing it on. She found her phone, which had disconnected from her sound system thanks to the power cut, and flicked the light on.

“Do you want to come with me?” she asked. Aubrey nodded, and put her shirt and cardigan back on. They made their way to the kitchen, where Beca pulled out a much more substantial flashlight so they could go down into the basement. Aubrey had no idea what she was looking at. Fuses looked confusing. But Beca seemed to know what was happening, because she flipped a couple of circuit breakers and the power came back on.

“Okay,” Beca said. “Think I might keep this flashlight with me though.” Aubrey smiled at her and they went back upstairs. Beca opened the front door so they could see how bad it was getting outside.

“Wow,” Aubrey said. “Um… I don’t think I want to drive in that.”

“I don’t want you to drive in that either,” Beca said. “Will your mom care if you stay the night?”

“I’ll call her, but I think given the weather she’d be fine,” Aubrey said. She didn’t know how true that would be now that her mom was aware she and Beca were dating. She went and got her cell while Beca called her dad.

“Aubrey?” her mother said. “Thank goodness. I was starting to worry, with this weather.”

“I’m still at Beca’s mom,” she said. “I uh, don’t like the idea of driving home in this storm. Beca said it was okay for me to stay.” There was a brief silence.

“Aubrey, are you and Beca sleeping together?” her mother asked. 

“What?” Aubrey said. “No, mom. We’re not. I’m not ready for that yet, which she understands.”

“Can I ask you a really weird favour?” she asked. “Don’t keep it a secret from me when it starts happening. I know it’s bound to happen soon, you’re a senior in high school.”

“I swear mom, we’re not having sex,” Aubrey said. “But I will tell you when it happens. So, about staying the night?”

“Oh sweetie, stay there,” her mom said. “If it’s half as bad in Greenhill as it is in Barden I don’t want you out in that. But call me in the morning?”

“I will,” Aubrey said. “I promise.” She hung up and went and found Beca at the dining table. 

“Dad made me swear we didn’t need him and Sheila to come home,” Beca said. “I told him I knew how to reset the circuit breakers and we’d be fine.”

“Mom said I should stay,” Aubrey said. Beca was looking at the table in front of her, thinking.

“Bree, I want you to stay,” she said. “And I loved fooling around with you just before. But we need to pull it back a bit because I was starting to get incredibly turned on and we’re here alone and it would be easy to just keep going. Which would be great except you said you weren’t ready yet. Is that okay? Does it make sense?” Aubrey made her way over and sat on Beca’s lap and pressed a soft kiss to her lips.

“I love that you are always so concerned with me and how I’m feeling,” Aubrey said. “And of course it’s okay. I was having a really good time, but to me it would be just as great to be curled up in bed next to you.” Beca looked relieved. 

“Good,” she said. “Now, if you’re anything like me you’d feel incredibly guilty calling for takeout again, especially since the weather’s gotten so much worse. So get prepared, because I’m going to see what we have so I can cook you dinner.”

“You’re going to cook for me?” Aubrey asked. Beca nodded, and Aubrey kissed her hard. 

“Let me help?” Aubrey said. “I’ll start by making coffee.” They got up and headed into the kitchen together, Beca opening the pantry and Aubrey setting the coffee going so they could cook as a team.


	14. Chapter 14

The double date went off without a hitch. Aubrey and Chloe had driven up to Beca’s place and Luke picked all three of the girls up from there. He and Chloe seemed to be getting along great, and the four of them made a comfortable group as they grabbed dinner before they headed to see the band.

It was definitely more Beca and Luke’s taste than Aubrey and Chloe’s, but they still had a good time. Aubrey was just always happy to have her arms around Beca, to be anywhere near her. And Chloe and Luke did end up making out during the concert, which surprised nobody. They also held hands on the way back to Luke’s car which was adorable. But Beca didn’t hassle him and Aubrey didn’t mention it to Chloe until she’d kissed Beca goodbye and they’d gotten in Chloe’s car to head home.

“So you and Luke are dating now?” Aubrey asked.

“Yeah, we are,” she said. “I was pretty sure that’s how tonight was going to end up. We’ve been texting for weeks and he’s nice. Really good looking. Not an asshole.”

“Well that’s good,” Aubrey said. “Maybe we could hang out again sometime. I like Luke he’s never made me feel like I’m wasting Beca’s time.”

“Well, you aren’t,” Chloe said as she changed lanes. “How are you guys doing anyway?”

“Um... I kind of wanted to talk to you about something,” Aubrey said. “Related to that.”

“What is it?” Chloe said. “You’ve gone pink. Oh. This is about sex.”

“It’s been over five months,” Aubrey said. “Beca has never once pressured me or made me feel like a tease for wanting to take things slowly. And we’ve come close and... I’m ready but I don’t know how to say that. And I have questions but I don’t want to seem like a complete idiot.”

“What are the questions?” Chloe asked. “You can ask me anything.”

“It’s more being worried I’m not doing things right,” Aubrey said. “How will I know?”

“Well as long as you’re paying attention to how Beca is responding you’re gonna be fine,” Chloe said. “But you’re ready?”

“We’ve fooled around and clothes have been removed,” Aubrey admitted. “Never all at once. But she’s very careful not to hurry me. Now I’m at the point where I don’t want to stop.”

“So that’s what you say,” Chloe said. “Next time you guys are fooling around and she puts the brakes on, just say something like ‘please don’t stop’ and she’ll probably stop for a sec to make sure you’re serious, but she definitely wants you.”

“She does?”

“Uh, of course she does. She is so into you,” Chloe said. “It’s in every single thing she does. I don’t know why you’d doubt it.”

“I guess I just sometimes feel like it’s too good to be true,” Aubrey said. “That someone would love me like this, make me feel like this, when I’ve fought against it myself for so long. Still am fighting myself, really.”

“You deserve to feel loved Aubrey,” Chloe said seriously. “Honestly, Beca has been so good for you. I’ve been your best friend since forever, but you’ve never been happy like this. Never been comfortable with yourself like this. She brings out the stuff I’ve always seen in you.”

“I love her so much Chlo,” Aubrey said. “She makes me feel... hopeful. For the future.” Chloe smiled to herself. That was an interesting choice of phrase but she didn’t want to call it out. But it sounded like Beca had sowed at least one tiny seed about her future being different than the Posen Plan. They chatted about more mundane things for the rest of the drive and as Chloe dropped Aubrey at home she reminded her that if she had any questions or wanted to talk, she only had to call.

“Or you could talk to Beca,” she pointed out. “She won’t think you’re crazy.”

“Thanks Chlo,” Aubrey said. She headed inside and texted Beca to let her know she’d arrived home safely. Beca responded saying she loved her and would see her tomorrow for a study date. She was grinning and stuffing the phone back into the pocket of her jeans when she spotted her mom watching some old movie in the living area. 

“Hey mom,” she said settling down in the couch next to her.

“Hey sweetie how was your night?” her mom asked.

“Really great,” Aubrey said. “The music was pretty good, and it looks Chloe is hitting it off with Beca’s best friend Luke. They’re dating now.”

“How’s Beca?”

“She’s amazing,” Aubrey sighed. Then she remembered her recent conversation with her mom about sex. “Um... you asked me not to keep a secret when we start sleeping together.”

“You slept with Beca?”

“Not yet,” Aubrey said. “But I’m ready for it. I feel like it’s going to happen soon. And it’s not something I’m doing lightly or being hurried into. I love her.”

“Okay,” her mother said. “Just be smart, be responsible. Don’t do anything stupid like the backseat of a car.”

“We won’t,” she said. “I expected more questioning than this.”

“You’re almost eighteen Aubrey,” her mother said. “I’m not an idiot I know these things start happening.” Her mom gave her a quick hug. 

“I’m off to bed,” Aubrey said.

“I would be too but Strangers on a Train only has about ten minutes left,” her mom said. Aubrey headed up to bed and was just sliding under the covers when her phone buzzed.

[You awake?] It was Beca naturally.

[Yeah just getting into bed now.]

[Check out this picture Luke just sent me that he took of us.]

The photo came through almost straight away and Aubrey loved it from first glance. She and Beca were watching the band play. Aubrey had her arms wrapped around Beca from behind and she was smiling as Beca had her neck craned slightly so she could kiss Aubrey’s cheek. They were both lit up by the different coloured stage lights and they looked happy.

[Oh god I love it!]

[Me too. It’s my lock screen already. xx]

The next day around lunch she met Beca out the front Starbucks for a full afternoon of study. They planned to eat first, choosing to walk up to the pizza place and grab a few slices. But today was about study so they ate quickly and made their way back to the coffee shop to get stuck into it. It wasn’t the ideal thing for the two of them to be doing on a Sunday but they were at least together. Jess appeared for an afternoon-evening shift, dropped off by Ashley. The two of them shared a few kisses in the car park before Jessica entered, Aubrey watching with an indecipherable expression on her face.

“What’s on your mind?” Beca asked. Aubrey shook her head, trying to indicate that it was nothing. But Beca knew something was up so she just went and grabbed them both a pick me up and returned to the table.

“Talk to me,” she said. Aubrey’s face fell into an expression Beca was getting familiar with. ‘I do want to say something but you need to wait so I can pick my words properly if that’s okay.’ So she waited a while, humming to herself until Aubrey was ready to talk.

“I wish I was brave enough to not worry about kissing you in public like that,” she said softly. “I hate that I’m still so afraid of my dad that it’s making me restrict showing how I feel about you.”

“I don’t mind,” Beca said.

“No this isn’t a you and me thing, I don’t think,” Aubrey said. “It’s a me thing. Because you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, it’s the me stuff that’s ruining it all.” She looked quite upset now. Beca scooter around the table to sit next to her.

“Hey,” Beca said. “I love you, Aubrey. You’re not ruining anything. It’s okay to be scared and hesitant and stuff. But I’m not going anywhere. I’m here with you because I want to be, and I always will be.”

“It gets harder and harder to like myself when I feel like I’m being really unfair to you,” Aubrey mumbled. 

“Well I don’t feel like it’s unfair,” Beca said. “I get to sit here with you, and know that I’m yours and you’re mine. I get to be the person who knows you best. I get to share my life and stuff with you. That’s a fair deal to me. And if I have to choose between kissing you in private or not at all that’s not a hard choice.”

“I hate this,” Aubrey sighed to herself. She felt Beca’s hand on her knee and squeezed it.

“I hate that I can’t really make this one go away,” Beca said. “But I love you. That’s a promise.” They returned to their work but Aubrey had settled in a funk now. After a while Beca got antsy looking at how down she was, so she started packing up their stuff.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“Come with me,” she said. “Road trip.” Aubrey checked her watch.

“Um...”

“I’ll have you home by seven,” Beca said. “It’s early, just trust me.” Aubrey didn’t feel like studying any more so she got up and followed Beca to her car.

Beca headed to Greenhill. She drove to the west side of her old school campus, stopped the car and killed the engine.

“What’s this?”

“This is Greenhill,” Beca said. “I hated this place so much. I’d come and sit here and just absolutely tear myself to pieces over it. Why couldn’t I just be straight and avoid this hassle? Why couldn’t I just be strong enough to let it roll off me? Why couldn’t I just make them leave me alone? I cried sitting here more days than I can count. But I still come and sit here and think sometimes.”

“Why?”

“Because I’ve made it above that shit now,” she said, gesturing down. “Because I made it through that. Because all of that absolute shit that I went through brought me to Barden and it brought me to you. It reminds me that as deep as the shit seems sometimes, I survived. And you will too. If your dad finds out and it hits the fan, I’ll be there with you and you’ll make it through. If he finds out and he’s okay with it, I’ll be there. I’ll be there if you go off to be a lawyer at Harvard or Yale or if you decide to break outta that plan and go to Columbia to study poetry like Jane Hirshfield. But whatever happens, Aubrey, you’re going to make it. That’s what I know. Fuck the variables. You’re going to make it.”

“I’m so tired of feeling like I’m in a cage, Beca,” Aubrey whispered. “So much of me is not what I want it to be.”

“So break out,” Beca said to her. “Whenever you’re ready.” She brushed her lips softly against Aubrey’s cheek and then started up the car to drive back to Barden. Aubrey didn’t speak but she did keep her hand firmly planted on Beca’s knee. When they pulled up back at Starbucks, Beca turned her car off and Aubrey broke her silence.

“I love you,” she said to Beca. “I guess I’m just struggling because the more and more I fall in love with you the more it hurts keeping it all bottled up. And I’m getting so tired of fighting it, because it’s really hard to contain how I feel about you. Half the time I just freak out and imagine all the ways my dad can make my life hell but the other half I just want to rip the bandaid off.” She sighed.

“You know you can call me any time right?” Beca said. “Middle of the night, even. I don’t care. Or Chloe, she wouldn’t care either.”

“I know,” Aubrey said. She leaned over and kissed her. “Thank you. I’m ready to go home.”

“Hey,” Beca said. “Call me if you need, Aubrey. Promise me.”

“I promise.” Beca waited to make sure Aubrey had driven away before she got out of the car and headed in to grab a coffee before she headed home. Jessica was still at the machine and she noticed Beca’s down expression.

“You okay?” she asked her.

“Oh yeah,” Beca said. “Aubrey.”

“You guys okay?” Jessica asked. “You didn’t break up or anything?”

“No, it’s just...” Beca shrugged.

“I get a break soon,” Jessica said. “Wait a few minutes and we’ll talk.” Beca checked her watch. Her dad was at Sheila’s that night so she wasn’t in a hurry.

“Yeah okay,” Beca said. Jessica handed her coffee and Beca went and took a seat where she always sat with Aubrey. In a few minutes, Jessica dropped down into the chair opposite her with a bottle of water and a container of fruit salad.

“So what’s up?” Jessica said. “You seem bummed, and it’s not usual for you.” She began picking at the fruit salad.

“She just had a rough afternoon,” Beca said. “It uh, started when Ash dropped you off. We could see you guys through the window and she was really beating herself up about not being brave enough to be with me in public, you know?”

“Oh, sorry,” Jessica said.

“No, don’t apologise,” Beca said. “She said it’s a her thing. She’s scared and everything, you know her dad still doesn’t know about us yet. And she said she’s just finding it harder to keep how she feels about me to herself and then she starts in again beating herself up about being scared and weak. It’s hard to hear. I keep trying to reassure her that I love her and I’m not going anywhere but it didn’t really help today.”

“I can’t imagine how hard it must be to feel that,” Jessica said. “She’s got so many people ready to support her once she starts making steps on her own but it would still have to be terrifying.”

“And she’s just gone home to like, stew in it all night, I know it,” Beca said. “God I hate seeing her like this.”

“I think as much as you want to fix it all for her, you can’t,” Jessica said. “But you’re doing all you can. As long as you’re with her, she’ll be okay. This is still all really new to her, too.”

“I don’t even think it’s just about the gay thing any more,” Beca said. She sighed. “I don’t know it just sucks when she’s upset. I want to just make her feel better but I don’t wanna smother her either, or just be someone else in her life making decisions for her.”

“No she doesn’t need that,” Jessica said. “She’ll figure it out. Eventually.”

“I guess,” she replied. “I should probably get going. Thanks for the talk though. I appreciate it.”

“Hey, we’re still friends,” Jessica replied. “Any time.”

“And how are you and Ashley doing anyway?” Beca asked.

“We’re doing pretty great,” Jessica said. “I’m happy.”

“Good,” Beca said. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Yeah,” Jessica said. “Drive safe.” Beca got back into her car with her half empty coffee and headed back home. She texted Aubrey to let her know she was home and went to take a shower. When she got out she realised Aubrey still hadn’t texted her back. That was unusual. She called her cell, immediately hearing the sniffle of a crying Aubrey on the other end.

“Okay I’m coming down there,” Beca said. “Be there soon.”

“No,” Aubrey said. “My dad’s here. He’ll want to know why you’re staying so late. Why you aren’t in the guest room.”

“Bree you’re crying,” she said. “I can’t just sit here.”

“I’ll be okay,” she said. “Just a bad day today.”

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come?” Beca said.

“Stay there,” she said. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

“I love you,” Beca said intently. 

“I love you too,” she said in response. But then she hung up and Beca was feeling worse than before. She wanted to drive right down there but Aubrey had expressly said not to. She couldn’t just do nothing though. So she called Chloe.

“Hey,” came Chloe’s voice. 

“Hey,” Beca said. “Are you busy?” Chloe responded not really because she was okay ignoring her math homework if it was required. So Beca explained to her the afternoon she’d just had with Aubrey and how she’d just been on the phone in tears.

“I don’t know what to do Chloe,” Beca said. “Can you like call her or something? She doesn’t want me to come down there but I can’t stand the thought of her being alone right now.”

“I’ll call her see if she wants me to go over there,” she said. “We had a talk last night that makes me feel like she might be approaching a crossroads between what makes her dad happy and what will make her happy.”

“Thanks Chloe,” Beca said. “I just hated hearing her cry and being all the way up here.” She hung up and texted Aubrey one last time, just to say that she loved her and would see her in the morning. Then she called for some Chinese for dinner, pulling out her music paper to work on while she waited.

She got a text from Chloe after she’d finished dinner, still plowing through her music paper.

[I’m staying the night. She’ll be okay.] 

Almost immediately she got one from Aubrey.

[I love you too Beca. More than anything.]

She felt an immediate wave of relief wash over her. She didn’t think Aubrey was going to break up with her or anything but even just that one text was enough to make her feel a whole lot better. She was able to concentrate and finish up her music paper before heading to bed. 

The next morning she waited for Aubrey on the hood of her car. She knew the residual feeling of something heavy in her stomach wouldn’t go away until she saw her. When Aubrey pulled up and got out Beca saw her smiling. Aubrey had her backpack in one hand and dropped it next to Beca, pulling her to her feet and kissing her hard. Beca was shocked for a second but she reciprocated the kiss happily, wrapping her arms around her.

“Bree?” Beca said once she’d been released. She wasn’t going to complain but Aubrey had never kissed her like that in the parking lot where everyone could see before. 

“I love you,” Aubrey said sincerely. “And I’m done hiding it now. My dad is going to react however he’s going to react. So why hide?” 

“Sounds like you and Chloe talked a lot last night,” Beca said, picking up Aubrey’s bag and handing it to her before shouldering her own. She slung it over her opposite side so they could hold hands as they walked. A few heads turned and they ignored them.

“I’m hoping you’re free this afternoon so we can talk,” Aubrey said.

“Of course,” Beca said. “I’m glad you’re feeling better today.” She walked with her to homeroom, Chloe beaming at them both as they entered. Aubrey immediately began chatting to Stacie, so Beca leaned over to Chloe.

“Dude she’s...” Beca couldn’t even put it into words.

“I know,” Chloe said. “She wants to tell you all about it.” Beca shot a look over at her girlfriend. She was even sitting straighter like she was lighter, like some weight had come off her shoulders. All Beca could think was that she was ridiculously beautiful and she was content to stare at her for the rest of homeroom.


End file.
